damned_institute | Day 30: Cafeteria, Dinner

And just like that her good mood was gone. The mention of torturing at night caused her to wince, and while she couldn’t show it, Kairi was exceedingly grateful for the hand squeeze. She returned the motion quickly before releasing his hand so she could rest her elbows against the table, her chin nestled against her knuckles as she listened to the two boys speak.

“They also sound like heartless,” she whispered softly once the two were done commenting, her heart beat beginning to beat even at the word. She was able to keep her slight twitch under control, at least. “From my world. Except they don’t steal souls, just your heart. And you … die, for the most part.”

Trying to make the conversation a bit lighter, Kairi looked to Harry with a curious smile. “I take it you know magic then? That’s pretty cool. I tried to learn magic once from Sora and Riku, but it was too complicated for me.”

Harry was thankful for the subject change and he was also glad that Renji had escaped the dementor. From what he had read on the bulletin though, they were the least of the worries here at Landels.

Harry ate a bit of his food as he nodded and swallowed before responding. "On my world there's an entire school for wizards," he pointed out. "My parents were both magical, but they died when I was really young..." There it was again, talking about his parents. He frowned and put his fork down. He would gladly continue the conversation, but first he needed to know something.

"Renji?" he asked, looking at the man. "The visitors that come. What do your people make of them? Are they really the people they look like or are they fakes? On my world there's plenty of ways for people to look like other people, but considering everything I've seen here I think it's also possible that they've been brainwashed or are being controlled some other way."

"I bet you could learn kidou, Kairi. You've got a strong soul," Renji said. "You should ask Rukia to show you some, one night at dinner. She's real good at it." He chuckled. "Though it is pretty complicated. We're a lot alike, I guess. I'm not... real good at kidou."

Listening to Harry talk, he wondered if maybe these people were something like Quincies. Before they'd been wiped out, they'd sounded pretty organized. Still, pondering aside, he said, "I'm sorry to hear that." Death wasn't a big deal, but he supposed it still sucked for the people that got left behind.

He set his fork down when Harry asked about the visitors, losing his smile, his face going still. "I didn't have a visitor last week. The one from this week... he wasn't someone from home. He was someone I knew from here." His voice got quieter as he spoke. He looked at the wall past Harry's head. "It was him. Like the real person. You can't disguise a soul."

“I’m sorry to hear about your parents, Harry,” Kairi whispered softly to the boy, a sad smile crossing her lips. “I never knew my parents. Or, at least, I don’t remember them.” A pause, and she continued. “The magic school sounds pretty fun, though. You’re lucky.”

A strong soul. That made Kairi wince once again, and she turned to look at Renji with a forced smile. “You think so? Thank you.” It made her wonder – if she had a strong soul, would the darkness have affected it in any way? She knew she was a strong person (it was her mantra lately) but she honestly did not know how much damage the darkness had done to her since she had accepted it.

Another thing she’d have to wait out.

“Someone from here?” Shock filled Kairi’s face as Renji’s voice slowly became quiet, and she reached out to place her hand gently against his arm. She had never had a visitor, so to hear about a visitor coming for a friend of hers was quite the surprise. Turning to Harry, she frowned, looking at him with concerned eyes. “Did you have a visitor too?”

Harry nodded at Renji's information. "You're sure?" he asked, just because he didn't want to believe it. "I'm sorry... about your friend."

He looked at Kairi and managed a small smile. At least she could relate in some ways, maybe she could understand why it bothered him so much. "Yeah, my parents."

Renji didn't remember his parents; he'd died too young and Shinigami never recalled much of their living time anyway. He didn't see a reason to add that to the discussion, though. It was different, for him, he guessed. At this point he'd lived so long without thinking about it, with Rukia as his only family, that it didn't bother him in the slightest.

"It was Nowe," he said. "He disappeared about a week ago. Still gotta tell Sora about it."

He looked back at Harry, frowning. "I don't know what it means," he said. "Whatever they did to Nowe, he believed all of the lies they keep telling us in this place. He claimed that he just had some kind of... uh... moment, where he realized that they were right and he was somehow all better. I don't know. But it was him. I don't know if it's the same for the other visitors, though. The things here at night, that look like people we know, don't have souls. It could be something like that. But I don't know. I didn't... look at anyone else while I was there."

He'd been far too upset to think of something that simple, or smart.

“Oh,” came Kairi’s small response to Harry’s parent comment, her eyes lowering to peer at the table in silence. “I’m sorry to hear about that.” She allowed the topic to end there, knowing it was for the best. She didn’t know what she would have done if it were her adoptive parents that ever visited her – it wouldn’t be as bad as Harry’s visit, because at least her parents were alive (as far as she knew, anyway) so she couldn’t even fathom what he had gone through.

Nowe. She vaguely remembered the conversation between Sora and Renji when they had all first met – Renji had been injured and they had gone to visit and she had overheard. She had suspected he was a friend, but from the sounds of things, he was much more than a simple acquaintance.

“Maybe …” Kairi spoke up finally, a frown crossing her lips as she tried to think. “Maybe it’s like what Naminé and I are. Naminé is my Nobody – she and I look quite similar, except she has blonde hair. Her and I have completely different personalities, yet we are still basically the same person in a sense. Maybe it was something like that? It could have been him, but it might not have been at the same time?”

Harry felt a little better at having admitted what happened to him. It had still shaken him pretty badly. All of his life he had wanted to meet his parents and just when he had grown past that they were there, staring him in the face. It was a difficult thing to deal with.

"Even if it is them," Harry added after Kairi spoke. "We'll find a way to save them." He had to believe that, or else what would be the point of continuing. He was a little curious about this 'nobody' thing that Kairi was talking about though he wasn't sure if now was the right time to ask about it. He would have to remember to do so later.

"We will," Renji agreed with Harry. He'd already promised as much to Nowe, even if the kid wasn't aware of it. "No one gets left behind." Perhaps they would find Ichigo on the outside, and Byakuya as well, though that thought was rather disturbing on its own. "And if they're coming here to see people, I bet the former prisoners are still in the general area." He sounded very certain and confident; he didn't allow for the possibility of defeat.

He gave Kairi a rather confused look. "What's a Nobody?" he asked. And the way she'd said it... "Does everyone have one, where you're from?"

Oh. That’s right, she had never explained what a Nobody was.

“Oh!” Kairi perked up suddenly, a slight blush crossing her cheeks as she lifted her good hand to cover her mouth. “I should have explained earlier.” A sheepish smile crossed her lips, and she reached up with her hand to scratch absent-mindedly at the bandage that was covering the scratches on her cheek.

“A Nobody is like … a shell, Harry had mentioned. Not everyone has them back in my world, no. I know Sora has one, but that’s about it. Anyway, one gets a Nobody only if they hold a strong heart … and then they lose that heart. In that instant when the heart and body are separated, a Nobody is created. They’re kind of like a shadow of your original self, but … not,” a pause, and Kairi continued. “They don’t have a heart. They can’t exactly feel any emotions, but they do remember what they feel like, so they are able to act like they have them. Though, for Naminé, she can feel some things. Roxas can too, I think – oh, Roxas is Sora’s Nobody.”

“Anyway, most Nobodies have some sort of power. For instance, my friend, Axel, can control fire. He’s a Nobody too, but …” a pause, and Kairi felt her heart speed up a little. “He’s … different too. Then there’s the other Nobodies, who formed Organization XIII. They’re … … just. I don’t know. Most of them are not good people.”

Harry listened to Kairi and thought about it. It sounded a little more like the Inferi to him, but those were dead people who had their bodies controlled, they couldn't really think on their own. He wished he had someone like Snape, Dumbledore of Remus around who would know if there was anything like that on his world. Actually, he hadn't seen Snape in a while either. He glanced around the mess hall, but caught no sight of his ex-Potions Master. He didn't want to worry about it too much, so instead he kept his focus on Kairi.

She was really cute, actually, in a way where she was younger than Harry and he wasn't actually attracted to her, but where he did feel comforted around her. He wished he had some kind of healing potion or something he could give her to help with the injuries. She didn't exactly remind him of Ginny, but it was close enough that he felt the desire to befriend her and protect her.

He really didn't have anything to add to what she had said, but one thing had unsettled him slightly. "That's got to be difficult. To remember emotions but not have them."

The explanation sort of made sense, if he thought of it in terms of souls rather than hearts. Kind of. He blinked a few times, grasping on to the more curious point. "You and Sora lost your... hearts? Then... got them back?"

Now that was truly odd.

Renji finished up his dinner. He'd wanted a good meal under his belt before he did anything. He still needed to be in good shape for tonight, so he couldn't give Kairi everything he had, but he could at least fix up her hand, and maybe some of the cuts and bruises.

"Hold still for a second." He reached over to rest his hand lightly on top of her injured one, then closed his eyes as he began to recite the incantation. He didn't push as much of his energy in to her as he could have, stopping short of giving himself one of those concentration destroying headaches. Still, he was feeling very dizzy when he opened his eyes again.

“Mhm. Actually, it happened –“ but she decided not to speak about last night. She had barely even spoken to Sora about it, anyway. “… I’m sure Sora would be able to tell you more about it than I could.”

When Renji told her to sit still, Kairi did as she was told. Turning back to Harry, she nodded her head and smiled sadly. “It does. I don’t know what I would do if I couldn’t … feel genuine things. I mean, I’m sure they can feel something …” a pause, and she frowned. “Actually. I know they can feel hate and anger. But other than that? Nothing, I don’t believe. Envy, maybe. But that’s all I can think of from what I’ve seen.”

Looking back towards Renji when she realized her hand didn’t hurt, she soon figured out what he had done and reached out to grasp onto his arm in a tight hug. She had seen Rukia last night, and the poor girl had practically almost fallen over.

That still didn't sound very fun to Harry. To only be able to feel emotions that made you miserable? Never happiness or friendship or love? That was worse than death.

He watched Renji with some curiosity as he touched Kairi and muttered some words. "What did you just do?" he asked, confused, as Kairi hugged the red haired man.

"I'll ask him about it some time," Renji said. It did sound sad, to only be able to feel things like anger. Though if the example Byakuya set was to be believed, not feeling anything at all would be best. It wasn't an example Renji wanted to follow, to be certain. As much as his passions got him in trouble, he preferred the way he was to the alternative.

After he finished the incantation, he gave Kairi a crooked smile. "Hand all better?" he asked. That had been his main concern. Having only one hand to use was - he knew well from experience - sucky.

He turned his head slowly so he could look at Harry. Even if a little dizzy, he felt lucky; he'd escaped even the nose bleed, it seemed. But he also knew that if he tried to use kidou again this night, he would be flat on his face. That was how it worked. "Kidou," he said. "For healing. 's not much, but it's better than nothing."

While Sora wasn't sure why they were having dinner in the cafeteria, he wasn't about to protest. All he knew was that he hadn't eaten all day, which meant that he made a beeline for the food line the minute he entered the room.

Piling his food with the pork, along with mashed potatoes with gravy and corn on the cob (coleslaw was gross), his arms strained under the wait of his tray as he turned to the room at large and looked for a place to sit.

Kairi was the first person he spotted, and he was elated to see that she was with Renji and Harry, as well! He had only met Harry once, on the bus with Artemis, but he had seemed like a nice person, so Sora didn't hesitate in heading over to the group of three.

His hair was still a little damp from the shower, so it wasn't spiking up as much as it should have, but he did his best not to fuss with it. He was too busy thinking about his empty stomach.

Taking a seat next to Kairi, he sent a bright grin at Renji and Harry. "Hey! It's cool if I sit here, right?" He hoped it was, since he didn't want to put off eating any longer than he had to.

“Renji …” Kairi whispered, releasing his arm once she was sure he wasn’t going to topple over, “you didn’t need to do that … especially if something happens tonight.” Though, nothing could be changed now. Looking down to her wrapped up hand, she slowly began to unwind the bandages from around her hand. Once the appendage was free, she flexed her fingers and smiled. “But … thank you.”

Turning to look at Sora once he sat down on her other side, Kairi smiled and waved her now healed hand. “It’s fine! How’re you, Sora?”

She suspected that he had already known Harry considering how friendly he was being, so she didn’t introduce him or anything.

Harry was interested in what Renji had really done, because he hadn't used a wand or anything and if it was possible for him to learn then he wanted to at least try. The problem was that Renji also seemed a little out of it, so maybe he should wait to ask about it.

Whatever else he was going to say about it though was driven from his mind when Sora came to the table. He smiled slightly. "Sora," he said, recognizing the new comer to their table. "Have you seen a girl with lots of brown hair named Hermione?" He was happy to see Sora, of course, but Hermione was still on the front of his mind. He still couldn't see her anywhere in the crowd, and the mess hall was starting to fill up.

"Don't worry about it," Renji said, then cleared his throat. "It'll work out okay tonight, since I'll be with taichou. You need both your hands. If something happens." He turned to give Sora a broad grin. "Yeah, sure. Join us."

He leaned his elbows on the table, rubbing his eyes. He just needed to get over the fatigue from using the kidou.

Like he had figured, none of them protested him joining their conversation, so Sora took that as his cue to start shoveling food into his mouth. He tried not to be impolite, but he was starved and it was hard to hold back.

It was when he was in the middle of chewing that he heard Harry's question. As he finished and swallowed the food, he thought it over and eventually shook his head.

"No, I'm sorry. I'll keep an eye out for her, though." If one of the boy's friends was missing, then Sora could definitely sympathize with that. "So," he continued, glancing them all over, "what were you guys talking about?"

“Just chatting, really,” Kairi perked up after Sora’s question, a smile crossing her lips as she turned back to look at Harry. She really did feel bad about his missing friend – her and Sora knew all about that.

Trying to start off a new topic, the once Princess tilted her head to the side and regarded Harry with a curious expression. “So, can you tell me any more about your magic school? It sounds pretty awesome. I mean, back on Destiny Islands, school is just … school. Is your kind of magic hard to learn?”

Smalltalk, really. She just wanted the mood to lighten.

Harry watched Renji with a concerned face but Kairi's question snapped him back into their conversation.

"Oh," he said, pushing his glasses up on his nose. "Um... Well, it's just school too, only instead of learning arithmetic or writing you learn how to turn a tea cozy into a bird or how to make a feather fly across the room. I went to Muggle school until I was eleven, then the letter came inviting me to go to Hogwarts. Uh, Hogwarts is the name of the wizard school in the United Kingdom. My favorite class was Defense Against the Dark Arts... although some years it wasn't as nice as others." He rubbed his scared hand at the memory of Umbridge forcing him to cut the words into it. "Hermione was the smartest witch at the school." He looked around again, trying to catch any sight of her, but he still couldn't see her anywhere.

"Some about that thing that was in the MU hallway a couple nights ago. Sounds like we did about the best we could with it," he said.

He listened to Harry's explanation of the school, and had to wonder if it all sounded so ridiculous because he was still a little dizzy. "Hog... warts," he repeated quietly to himself. It was the oddest name he'd ever heard. He wondered if it was literal, and in that case, why the hell anyone would name a school that. "Sounds... kinda like the academy." He sounded a bit doubtful though.

He felt bad that Harry was still worrying about his friend. He knew how that went. "Don't suppose you could tell me what her soul feels like. I could try lookin' for her then," he offered. He wasn't certain how well that would work out, really, checking on a description, but it'd be better than nothing.

[ Sorry for the delay! ]

At the memory of that phantom they had encountered in the M-U hallway, Sora had to suppress a shudder. He could almost remember what it had felt like being around that thing, and it wasn't something he wanted to revisit. It had all turned out okay in the end, but he was hoping he could avoid that creature in the future if at all possible.

Hearing about a magic school, Sora focused on the much more exciting topic. A whole school just to learn magic -- he wondered if Donald had gone to anything like that! "I knew an old man who taught me a lot about magic," he said, smiling at the memory of the strange house behind the Third District of Traverse Town. "His name was Merlin, and he could do cool stuff like make the furniture in his house float around!" Granted, Sora had learned a lot of neat tricks himself, but it wasn't like he could show off any of it in this place.

Day 30: Cafeteria, Dinner

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