damned_institute | Day 51: Breakfast

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Day 51: Breakfast

Yuffie Kisaragi, indomitable bouncing ball of sunshine and unfathomable ebullience, was tired. It'd been a long night full of gibberish and getting nowhere fast.

"Can't I—"

Plucky, who had been busily loading a plate full of French toast and bacon, tittered. "I'm afraid not, Hanna, darling. A chat over a nice, hearty breakfast would do you a world of good, don't you think?"

"Aaaaactually—"

"Come on, let's find you a seat. Plenty to choose from this morning!"

For a long moment, Yuffie seriously considered doing something—anything—to act out. Punch her nurse, rub jam in an orderly's face, climb a wall and hang off the ceiling, jump on a table and parody Loveless… A ruckus like that would definitely jolt her back into gear, right? Sedation aside. And it'd turn Plucky's good day right on its head, which was always a bonus worth shooting for.

But, by the time she'd reached a decision—and it was an epic decision, a really awesome one; everybody'd appreciate the genius, she was sure—she was already alone. Her breakfast tray had been set down neatly by the nurse, who had left with an infuriatingly winsome smile.

"Wow," Yuffie muttered. Shaking her head, she picked a chair at random and threw herself into it. She kicked back, one arm slung across her eyes, to wait. For what, she wasn't totally sure. Some moron to decide that she looked like good company? That was how it usually went.

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Aigis woke with a start, still clutching her candlestick and flashlight. Rei, the Janitor’s closet, Athena… Could it really be that Athena was gone? No! She could still feel her. Just barely. Muted and hidden under a thin layer of… what?

Aigis followed Cathy, dazed, answering the nurse’s inane conversation with just a polite nod now and then. She stared blankly, allowing her nurse to select her breakfast, and she hardly noticed the growing din in the cafeteria around her. What could have stopped her from reaching Athena last night? Was it this place? Or this body?

So distracted was she by her thoughts she barely registered anything even an inch past her nose. As a result, she bumped against another patient, despite the brilliant color of his familiar, messy hair. The jarring sensation finally broke her from the spell of her thoughts. Heat. She reached out and touched his arm tentatively.

“Excuse me,” she said, almost too softly to be heard over the others talk around them. She gave him a nod of greeting, but her gaze drew past him, her thoughts a jumbled mess. Her voice still obviously distracted, she asked, “Would you mind if I join you for now?” She suddenly did not want to be alone with only her thoughts as companions.

At the touch, Heat instinctively stopped and turned to glare at the one responsible. His expression immediately softened upon seeing who it was however. He took her hand so that hopefully none of the nurses would try to separate her from him, and shook his head. Of course he didn't mind. There was no reason to even bother with a tray, since he wasn't going to eat the food they gave him anyway.

Part of him was pleased that she'd asked on her own, as there were very few people in the asylum at the moment that he actually cared to talk to. If he had to make a list, she'd be at the top of it. He hadn't had a chance to speak with her since the day before last anyway, and that hadn't been under the best of circumstances, what with the way the nurses had been keeping such a close watch over them both.

Once they were seated, he even offered her a small smile. "Are you all right? Nothing happened last night, did it?" Aside from that one screeching wail over the intercom, Heat hadn't noticed anything out of the ordinary. As he hadn't even been listening to the announcements to begin with, he'd just waved the matter aside as technical failure.

She was thankful he hadn't pushed her away. She had almost expected him to with all he had already put up with from her, so the reaction was a little surprising. The feeling of Heat's hand taking hers, it was warm, real, and also so very comforting. Aigis could have drowned in the warmth of feeling another person's hand in hers for eternity and never grow tired of the sensation. But somehow, the fact that it was Heat made it all the more special. Similar to Minato and yet still so different. The gesture contrasted with Heat's usual rough demeanor, and yet it felt so natural.

And despite the wonderful feeling it gave her, Aigis could not even muster the will to smile in return. Not now.

"Physically I am fine," she answered, pushing her tray forward and away from her after sitting. A few days ago, after Heat had shown her she now had the ability to eat, Aigis had taken advantage of her new skill with gusto. Today would be the first day since that moment that she did not feel like eating.

"But last night..." She paused a moment, taking a shaky breath and forcing her whirling thoughts into stillness. "Last night, while exploring with my companion, we came across a door with a faulty lock. We tried to break it down, but neither of us had the body strength. I then decided to call on Athena to help me with the task but, when I reached for her"--Aigis took another shaky breath, fighting the pressure building in the back of her throat--"she would not come."

She bit her bottom lip and kept her eyes on the tabletop in front of her. The shame and the confusion was almost too great to bear.

Heat frowned at that. Athena? Who was Athena? If she'd mentioned her before, he couldn't recall. If the connection was related to any special abilities she had, however, then the problem was simple. He wasn't the best at looking encouraging, but he tried nonetheless.

"Don't think that has anything to do with you." He crossed his hands over his chest. "That's what this place does. The guy in charge stifles everything about is that makes us more than ordinary so he can feel all powerful." Though he'd still been left with his demonic hunger, of course. Making things easier for any of the patients was out of the question in any shape or form. When Roland had lost control, Heat was fully willing to believe that Landel had gotten a kick out of it.

The demon raised his right arm again, showing the atma mark. "You think I can transform at night? I've tried. Nothing like that works here." The best he could do was turn his arm, and that was horribly painful - not to mention he couldn't even keep it that way for long.

Edited 2010-08-10 05:35 (UTC)

"I understand that it is not a problem I brought on myself. It's this place." She indicated the cafeteria, the building itself, with a wave of her hand then gazed at the outstretched limb. "This... defective 'humanity' Landel has bestowed upon me."

She sighed, lowering her arm and curling it around her. If she thought about it, she realized she had been leading Rei along all last night believing she could defend her. What a fool she had been, deluding herself into thinking that everything was fine, that summoning would be so simple even with her powers weakened.

"I am sorry to hear you have also had your abilities nerfed." She used the word Junpei had, hoping to sound more knowledgeable, though she wasn't sure what Heat's power really was. He'd never mentioned transformation, but maybe that was a demon's power. "But I was certain I could call on Athena to help. I can still feel her, and my friends have also mentioned they could summon their Personas fine although they lacked their normal strength."

Aigis shook her head, trying to dispel that ache that refused to leave her eyes. It was not a feeling she wished to continue feeling. "Perhaps I am the exception since I was not human before my transferal."

As much as Heat wanted to argue that there was absolutely nothing 'defective' about Aigis aside from the way she viewed her current situation, he really didn't know a lot her, her friends, or how they handled these other beings they apparently called on. It sounded so similar to being a demon, but nothing she didn't seem to even know what that was. Not to mention the fact that she considered this Athena to be basically a separate being. As far as he was concerned, Agni was just another part of himself.

"Nerfed?" he muttered in bemusement, not understanding the term. The demon scratched at the back of his head.

He wanted to be able to help this girl, but neither of them knew much about what she'd gone through in order to change from what she was before the Institute to what she was now. There wasn't much he knew about her friends either. If anything, this was something she should bring up with them.

"Your friends are human, right? Or were they androids too?" It could hurt to try a simple method like this one. "Have you asked them about what they do differently? If she's there, there has to be a way for you to call on her." He didn't know if there was, of course. There was always a chance that she was just too different from the others for it to work, but for now he was going to try and be optimistic for her sake.

Had she said it wrong? Perhaps it was not a word in Heat's lexicon, as it hadn't been in Aigis' when she had first heard it. She put a hand to her cheek for a moment in thought, trying to remember Junpei's analogy. "Nerfed. Junpei-san said it affected all our Personas, and used his Agi skills as an example. Instead of holding the power of a bonfire he said they now held only the power to leave a sunburn." It was obvious by her tone she was still a little confused on the matter.

"Yes, they are human. The others of my series were destroyed long ago." She listened to his advice, and took a moment to consider it. Yes, there was one big difference between how they summoned their Personas. "The Evokers."

She bit her bottom lip. Did she really need one, now that she was here in this faux human body? It would make sense. While it was theoretically possible one with the potential could summon a Persona without the use of an external source, Aigis had not been born with that skill. It had been implanted in her, written into her programming. Now that she was no longer just a machine, her programming should be gone and yet Athena stayed within her. Maybe because Athena had risen from Palladion and become a part of her very being. It was a ridiculous notion. Ridiculous, and the only guess she had.

She found herself laughing quietly, not sure what had brought on the strange reaction. She certainly wasn't happy, the usual emotion behind laughter, but she just couldn't help herself. "Yet another impossible thing becomes possible. I will never gain an understanding of this place."

"Did you say Agi?" Heat blinked at her. This was the first time he'd heard someone outside of his own comrades mention a spell name that he was familiar with. Or had he heard Junpei mention it before? It was hard to recall, seeing as he forgot most of what came out of that boy's mouth on principal. He wasn't even sure he could call up fire on his own here, given how he couldn't transform properly. He'd done it before, but nothing very powerful.

He was distracted from those thoughts as she mentioned others in her 'series'. On a very basic level that reminded him of the Junkyard and how most of it had been deleted before he and his friends had made it into the real world. It probably wasn't a good idea for him to be making such similarities between the two of them, but alone as he currently was he found it oddly comforting.

At her not-pleasant laughter, she received a not-pleasant smile in return. "I think that's the idea. If we started being able to understand this place then we might actually become comfortable with it." And heaven forbid that ever be allowed to happen. Landel seemed to enjoy keeping them on their toes.

"Hmmm, yes, " she mumbled, realizing he might not understand what she was talking about. Maybe she should clarify. "Agi. The ability to use fire."

Finding comfort in this place was certainly the last thing she wanted to do. Becoming used to this place? Unlikely, even for a Shadow battling android. The world she strove to create was peaceful and free of terrors at night. She wouldn't rest until they were free from this bondage of terror.... And with that thought, Aigis realized she was prioritizing again. This place had somehow leaped higher on her list than defeating Nyx, and that should not have happened. And yet, here in Landel's Institute, time seemed to stand still and Nyx felt worlds away.

"I appreciate your patience with me, Heat," Aigis whispered, looking back up. "I must remember, I cannot fall complacent here. Nor can I let them beat my spirit down."

She sighed, deflating a little again. "I only wish I could make it farther through the night. I was able to travel a bit last night, even to the second floor, but because of my disabled abilities... I was unable to progress to my satisfaction."

"I know what Agi is." Heat waved off the explanation a bit irritably. He should have explained his own question better, but it didn't really matter now. "I use it too."

Neither of them were getting very far, it looked like. Somehow they had to make it back before Aigis' two week deadline was up, and Landel seemed to be doing his damnedest to keep them from that. It wasn't even taking much for him to do so, and that was the most infuriating part. They didn't know how powerful Landel was, but they knew he had almost complete control over what they could or couldn't do here.

Meanwhile, Aigis' demeanor was reminding him far too strongly of Sera right now, and he rubbed awkwardly at the back of his neck. "Hey, we'll figure this shit out. Quit looking so depressed about it."

"You also..." Aigis looked up, surprised by this new information. Heat also used Agi. Maybe that wasn't so special. Some Shadows used Agi just as easily as Junpei's Trismegistus could, but Aigis realized something she had never even considered before. Reaching out, the android very tentatively touched her fingertips to the tattoo-like mark on his arm; he had taken her hand before, but she didn't want to overstep.

"I wonder. Maybe a demon is more like a Persona than a Shadow." She smiled in a quiet fashion. "Or, at least, perhaps your kind of demon is."

She looked depressed, did she? Maybe that was true, but couldn't she be allowed at least a little bit of shame and sadness? "I'm sorry. I do not wish to trouble you, Heat." She forced an even brighter smile than before, but it was a pathetic attempt. It faded within only a few seconds, and she sighed again. "It is not something I believe can be easily 'figured out.' It is a physical problem, and not one this body can easily remedy."

Never before had Aigis believed having a human body could be so limiting. How much had she wished she could understand her friends better, and how she had envied their mortality. Now Martin Landel had taken her dream and turned it into a shackle. It could only bring her down and impede her.

The awkwardness increased as she reached for his arm, and his face turned slightly pink. However, he didn't move it away, allowing her to get a better look at it. "Sure. Maybe." He had no idea what a Persona was like, but if they used the same sort of spells he did, then perhaps there were similarities. Every time he thought he had a handle on what he was, something else popped out of the woodwork.

"And stop saying that. You're not any trouble." Quite the opposite, really. She wasn't a demon, but she was more similar to those he knew than practically anyone else in the asylum. That meant something. She also wasn't crappy company, which couldn't be said for most of the people he came across.

He patted the top of Aigis's hand lightly, trying once again at the comfort thing.

Aigis wasn't sure what to make of the changing of color on his cheeks. Was he angry, or sad? What feelings preceded a blush? His words sounded relatively neutral. So Aigis just tilted her head as she traced the outline of the hungry flame. "I assure you, it is a good thing." If Heat's type of demon really was more like a Persona than a Shadow, then that would technically make him a guardian spirit rather than a hungry, soul-eating monster.

"It gladdens me to hear that," she said, truly very grateful for his kind words. But it also strengthened her resolve to work harder, to become someone who truly deserved to be seen as an asset rather than a burden. He may think she was no trouble, but she knew the truth. She would work hard, and without a doubt she would become the person Heat thought she could be.

She sighed again at feeling his reassuring touch on her own hands. If anything, this body made up for its impediments by giving her the ability to understand sensation. And Heat's hands were especially warm, perhaps even warmer than Minato's. It made her wonder, did his name come from such warmth, or was it because of his ability to use Agi?

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Day 51: Breakfast

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