damned_institute | Day 22: Brunch

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Day 22: Brunch

Cid usually liked sleeping in, especially in a place as messed up and uninviting as this, but this happened to be one situation where he really wished he hadn't.

Right there, on the bulletin board. The Head Doctor and he'd fucking missed it? Some part of him wished he'd been there to take his eye out and another part of him knew he wouldn't have been able to. No man that powerful who hid for so long went to dangerous places without some kind of entourage.

Brunch sounded like it'd be filling, at least, though he nearly stopped in his tracks when the bastard announced TEA. TEA. It'd been a damn long while since he'd had some fucking tea, though with all the stress this place had found fit to rain down on his fucking head, it hadn't really been the first priority on his mind. Kinda nice, even if Cid was sure this was just some game the mother fucker was playing to get them all stuck neck-deep in Stockholm Syndrome.

He scanned the mostly-empty room for any sign of a familiar face once he'd piled waffles and sausages and syrup on his plate, though the person he really wanted to talk to was that Reynolds guy. "Spaceship" was the last word he remembered clearly before waking up in his bed, and dammit if he wasn't going to keep it stuck like glue in his mind.

He found a table where he could watch people come into the cafeteria and grabbed for his mug. The steam rising from his drink and the bag of herbs in it was nearly enough to make him grin despite it all, and it was with marked leisure and a little relief that he drank his goddamn tea.

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Kurama furrowed his brow as he watched Hisoka. He hadn't meant to anger the boy again. Though it wasn't really him who was angering him...

"It's alright," Kurama replied, softening his voice to be as gentle and sincere as possible. "He'll get his due soon enough. They all will, for what they're doing to us here."

Hisoka turned his eyes away, seemingly surverying the room as he forced himself to calm.

"That's what the optimistically blinded say when they realize they're helpless," he commented icily, turning to look back at Kurama as his anger faded. "And I won't foolishly believe that someone is going to kill him one day. I'll do it myself."

Unballing his fists, the shinigami idly glanced down at his palms, unsurprised to find crescent nail marks in his skin. The question now was whether to continue the game. It was his turn, the other boy was here longer, he could perhaps give the shinigami more information than some of the others.

"If you say so..." Kurama replied. He gave Hisoka one last sympathetic gaze before schooling himself back to his calm expression. He knew what it was like to hate like that. Like a poison that coursed through your veins. One where the only remedy was murder...

"I believe it's your turn, Hisoka. If you'd still like to play, of course."

Ignoring the sympathetic look, Hisoka shrugged as he forced back his annoyance at being question, deciding to continue. If he merely asked the correct questions he could gather far more information about this place and not be so lost in the dark-- both literally and figuratively. But first...

"Why do you want to know so bad?"

"Because knowing things here...knowing people, can save our lives."

Kurama knew it sounded sappy, but it was true. And it was something he'd been neglecting as of late. He was so used to keeping to himself... In a situation like this, it was dangerous.

Hisoka had to fight to keep a straight face, never being one for sappy moments. Or any emotional moments at all. Yet the boy understood the message in the other boy's words, if only partially. He had been hearing rumors of monsters from the moment he arrived, but he still didn't understand how befriending others would save them. Wouldn't that only create liabilities?

"How would that save us now?" Hisoka asked, genuinely confused, not realizing that he had gone out of turn.

"Friends are pretty valuable here, when other resources are so few," Kurama pointed out. "You've been here two days, haven't you? You should know that you can't wander about by yourself. Not only that, but there's strength in numbers and the such. And not just physical strength."

Kurama sighed, folding his hands once more and resting his chin on them. His gaze was contemplative as he stared at the table. "Sometimes, friends are just important to have in a place like this. It can't be explained. There's something about a one-man-show that just drags you down after a while, leaving you nothing more than a shell, going through the motions. And I should know. I almost died by putting my faith in only myself, and I still didn't learn from it. It took a human woman to teach me that there's something special in the bonds we make with people...Something that can save more than just our lives. It can save everything that makes us who we are, and then some."

Hisoka shook his head, feeling odd for being the one to receive Kurama's explanation. Or perhaps he was just feeling out of place because he wasn't used to the lack of negativity. Even after being Tsuzuki's partner for several years had not allowed the boy to grow used to the lack of hate, not when he was always preparing himself for something that would make his partner snap and just... leave.

Funny how he tried to save the overgrown idiot when the time came.

The boy shook his head again.

"In a way, you're right... there are times when you need a friend to be there," Hisoka replied, definitely feeling odd as the words tumbled from his lips. "But people are liabilities. Friends are liabilities. You always worry about them, if they're okay and you have to protect them when they fall."

Like someone he knew. Hisoka frowned, fighting back the wonderings of just exactly what happened to his partner after the fire.

"And I've met a few of the people here, they are less than savory characters... I think it might be better if I'm alone."

Kurama shook his head. "It's never better to be alone. Sure, friends can be troublesome at times. They can cause their share of heartbreak and pain. You have to protect them and watch out for them. And when they get hurt, when you can't save them... It hurts you, as well." He paused, frowning slightly as his thoughts drifting back to Kuronue. There was that promise not to dwell on it...but it was hard to not think of it. Especially since his partner had disappeared again. As if he'd been swallowed up by this horrible place. The urge to look for him was strong, but there was nothing he could do during the day...

"But they give you a strength that no amount of training can produce," Kurama continued, the frown vanishing. "I've seen a boy with barely any training taken on a full-grown demon. Electrocuted nearly to the point of death, he was clearly outmatched. But knowing that his friends were in danger, that boy used his own life energy to attack the beast. He nearly died from it, but he won. If he had been fighting for himself, he never would have been able to tap into that energy. He would have been killed." He paused, smiling slightly.

"I can assure you, though, that not everyone here is unsavory as you think. I wouldn't mind being your friend if you think you can stand it," he added, teasingly.

Hisoka just sighed. That sounded like something Tsuzuki or Watari or Wakaba would say, believing full-heartedly that friendship was something no one could live without. Yet it just didn't make sense, why did everyone need someone to cling to and why was everyone disguising it as something good? Waking up every morning to wonder if that other person, that friend, was still going to be there that day did not sound like something worth possessing... Flushing slightly with shame for not knowing, Hisoka replied-

"I don't understand it... This need everyone seems to have to want 'friends', what's the point? And what is it anyway, a clique? Something for those to have in order to exclude others?"

The boy knew Tsuzuki had tried to explain once, even tried to show him, but it had done no good. All Hisoka had gotten from those explanations was that it meant others shared your pain. So... wasn't it better to be alone? To suffer alone?

"Having friends doesn't mean you need to exclude others." Kurama wasn't sure where Hisoka had gotten this idea. Granted, he himself tended to exclude others from his real life, but that was more for their protective than anything else.

"It's not a clique or anything. It's just...companionship." He sighed, wondering how he was supposed to explain this. Friendship wasn't just something you could read out of a dictionary and understand... "Some things are simply easier to deal with when you know someone will be by your side if you need them there. In a place like this, especially. Still, it's hard to explain. Words can't really catch its true meaning. It's just something you have to experience for yourself."

He paused to give Hisoka a smile. "You'll understand eventually, I'm sure. Just give it time. It's not something that happens overnight."

Hisoka scowled in attempt to cover up his moment of confusion, his walls of protection securely back in place.

"Whatever. I don't really care if I understand it or not, but if it makes your day then by all means be my friend already."

Inwardly pleased with the self-preservation, the shinigami let himself relax somewhat and turned his eyes down to the table.

"...What is it about this place though..." Hisoka asked thoughtfully after a moment of silence. "Why do they unlock the doors at night and what is with the talk of monsters?"

Kurama couldn't help the knowing smile that crossed his lips when Hisoka replied. Oh, he'd heard those words before. Not exactly, but the intention was the same. "Of course," he replied, knowing full well that Hisoka did care to understand, since he'd asked the question...

To Hisoka's question, Kurama merely shrugged. "I'm afraid it's beyond my knowledge as to why they do it... But the monsters are certainly there. It's not just talk. Twice now, I've run into the same psychopathic woman. The first time, she put a shard of glass through my arm for trying to pick a lock. The second time, she was carrying some kind of red-hot metal. My friend and I took the smart route and fled before she had the chance to attack us with it."

Hisoka frowned, ignoring the knowing response from the other boy and instead concentrating on the answers to his questions. So it was true then, even though he had come across no monsters, they were lurking somewhere in those dark halls and, by the sounds of it, not all of them appeared frightening at all. The boy frowned a bit more, he wanted to find the file kept on him-- as a hospital was bound to have-- but these monsters would hinder him if he was not prepared...

"What kinds of monsters are there and where are their normal haunts?" After a moment Hisoka then added dryly, "And I believe it's way past your turn."

Kurama laughed a bit when Hisoka mentioned his turn. "I'm done taking turns. I don't have any more questions for right now, so you can ask away, if you'd like." He paused to pick a bit at his food. "I don't know anything about the monsters themselves, though, or where they like to hang out. Just that the safest place is to stay locked in your room. Unfortunately, that's also the least productive."

Hisoka nodded, more than a bit relieved that the other boy decided to let the game die-- for now, anyway. It had been getting on his nerves having to wait to ask a question and he could only ask one at a time... The shinigami frowned at Kurama's next response though. Wait in his room?

"It's unfortunate that it's unknown where they are, but I do not intend to play it safe." Hisoka shook his head. "I want to find my file, do you know where they would keep it?"

Kurama thought for a moment before shaking his head. "I would suspect in the doctor's offices, but I don't know. I've never had much of an interest in my files, so I've never tried to look I'm sure they're mostly lies, anyway."

Just like most of the things that they were told. For a moment, Kurama was reminded of the visitations today, but he quickly pushed it aside. If he did have a visitor, he wasn't going to believe a word they said.

Hisoka's face turned thoughtful at that comment.

"I want to see what lies they've created and how far they've stretched the truth of my life. I want to know because I already know who my doctor will be..." The word 'doctor' was spat like poison, the boy's face darkening with this knowledge. "...and I don't want to be caught unprepared."

"I wouldn't recommend doing that on your own," Kurama warned. "Normally, the monsters prowl the halls, but if you try breaking into an office to get your file, you can bet they'll send someone after you. Like I said, I was trying to pick a lock when that woman attacked me. The second time, we were on the second floor and she told us to return to our rooms. Almost as if they're deployed to keep us in line at night..."

Hisoka shrugged, face serious.

"But they'll come after me just the same even if I follow your advice, right?"

If that was so, why jeopardize another-- especially if this other person was unable to deal with said monster as well-- when he could deal with it himself?

Kurama gave Hisoka a long look. He was being serious, wasn't he? "I don't think you understand the situation you'd be putting yourself in. Our powers are repressed here, but theirs aren't. You could be seriously injured. Especially tonight. If I'm right, they'll be brainwashing patients tonight. This isn't the time to be wandering off on your own."

Hisoka shrugged again.

"How does getting into groups make it better?"

If anything, that would cause more casualties... Being alone would allow him to run much quicker.

"Because there's strength in numbers," Kurama replied with a sigh. Was this really a difficult concept to understand? "Sticking with others keeps you from being ambushed. If you're cornered in a hallway, what do you expect to do? Like I said, you can be seriously injured tonight. People have been killed here before, only a few days ago. By another patient. I don't want that happening to anyone I know."

"There's also weakness in numbers," Hisoka replied stubbornly. "There's no chance of anyone but yourself being hurt if there is no one but you and as you said, someone was killed by another patient. Isn't that something that could be prevented by remaining alone?"

"No, it can't be prevented by remaining alone," Kurama replied. "You don't seem to understand. These patients are taken from their rooms and brainwashed to work for this building. They don't understand what they're doing anymore. Being alone only makes it easier for them to overpower you. And where does that leave the rest of us who worry about you? In a place like this, wandering off alone is quite possibly the most foolish thing you can do. It's pretty much up there with running through the halls and calling out the monsters. If you have any interest in surviving, you can not be a one-man-show here."

Day 22: Brunch

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