damned_institute | Nightshift 36: Main Hallway, 2-West

The look that Renji was describing was most likely a look of utter shock and terror. But Artemis couldn't be sure. He'd lost all feeling in his face when he'd heard what Renji had told him.

"N... No," Artemis finally found his mouth after a few tries. "No Renji, I won't do any such thing--it's not necessary. You're going to be fine," Artemis' voice was wavering. "The Captain says we'll find a healer and you'll be fine... you can't die while I live, you just... can't."

The tears spilled over his eyelashes and down his cheeks. "It's not fair... it can't happen this way, I won't let it. I didn't even have a chance to tell you...!"

The way this was going, Artemis was almost certain that nothing would be okay. If Renji died for his sake, nothing would ever be right again. Renji served people, and what did Artemis do that was so grand? Serve himself? No, this was all wrong, this was backwards. He should have been the one suffering from the poison now, not Renji. Not Renji, who had been his first friend here and the one he turned to regularly for sound, down-to-earth advice. This wasn't fair at all. This couldn't happen.

"TOBOE!" Artemis shouted, gripping Renji's hand as though that would keep him alive. "WHERE IS THE GODDAMNED HEALER?!"

He'd never felt this powerless before.

Toboe hunched and watched the people going by in the shadows, whining softly. "I don't know. I don't know. Why isn't anyone...why aren't they helping?"

Once more, Toboe shouted. Maybe this time...someone would listen. "Someone help!! Please, we need help!!"

Hitsugaya was quiet for some time, his head lowered as he heard Renji's last requests...and that's what they were.

No one was coming for them. As loudly as Toboe shouted, as desperately as Artemis pleaded, any help would be too late.

All because he chose to save the human.

"Fowl," Hitsugaya said quietly. "We're not going to find a healer in time. You know that..."

"It'll be... okay," he repeated. He tried to cough, but found that he didn't have the strength to do so; it felt like the pain had wrapped around his chest like an iron band that couldn't be moved.

Hope they find you, Rukia. Hope they save you like I couldn't.

He didn't breathe again.

[ooc: aaaaand I'm out! It was lovely guys, thank you!]

"NO!" Artemis shouted, turning his attention away from Renji to yell at Hitsugaya, "No, we are going to find one! He's not going to die, I won't--!"

The boy turned back to Renji as he repeated the words again. His hysteria immediately kicked up several notches when he realized Renji wasn't breathing. The hand that was in both of his was suddenly very cold.

"Renji! RENJI!!" Artemis screamed, shaking the man's shoulder. "No, no... no no no, no...!" His mind started racing. He could fix this. This wasn't so hard, he'd brought people back from the dead before. He could just do CPR until a healer arrived. Or put Renji in the freezer and call Holly. Or he could just do it himself. Yes, that's what he'd do.

He sat, holding Renji's hand, shuddering uncontrollably, tears freely streaming down his cheeks. He couldn't do anything. Renji was gone. He was gone...

Because of him. Because he had rushed in when Hitsugaya had told him to retreat. Because Hitsugaya had healed him instead of Renji. Another man was dead because of him.

Artemis looked up at the ceiling and screamed as loud as he could. It was the only way he could expel everything he was feeling.

[running in from here (http://community.livejournal.com/damned/497998.html?thread=40632910#t40632910)]

Before he'd reached the top of the stairway Hanatarou had heard the shouting from the hallway and the second call for help, and was moving as quickly as he possibly could. And yet, even as he burst through the door and staggered a few steps to regain his balance (wincing slightly at the pain from his very-recently-bruised leg) he knew that it was already too late.

The healer flinched at Artemis' scream, finally reaching the group wide-eyed and out of breath and yet still unable to do anything to help his friend. He'd taken too long recovering after healing Bridget, too long making his way through the hallways up here, and he'd only proven himself once more to be worthless and unreliable.

"T-taichou, Fowl-san, I..." 'I'm too late, I'm sorry' wasn't anywhere near adequate to express what he was feeling, so Hanatarou just swallowed and continued, pulling makeshift bandages out of the pillowcase he was carrying. "W-who needs help more?" There was so much blood everywhere and he hadn't been there and he carefully didn't quite look at Renji again and remind himself of the one he hadn't been able to help.

Toboe's ears rang from Artemis's scream, his head spun.

There hadn't been anything they could do.

At a complete loss, Toboe slowly and dazedly made his way back, kneeling beside Artemis and beside Renji. Apologizing seemed so useless. The wolf reached out instead and wrapped his arms around the slightly smaller boy.

Hanatarou's timing couldn't have been worse. He didn't need Artemis' scream to know that Renji had passed on, and it had all been his fault. Hitsugaya had lost many shinigami before, some directly due to orders that necessarily placed them in danger, but never before was he forced to make a decision such as the one he had made. He prayed he would never have to make such a decision again. The feeling of guilt crept into his stomach and twisted and turned it about.

He stared at Hanatarou for ten long seconds before speaking. "Fix Fowl first."

Considering the circumstances, one could say that Artemis wasn't entirely himself. Artemis himself would have said the same, because the moment Toboe touched him, the boy seized the other boy around the middle and began sobbing into his shirt.

"N-no!" Artemis shouted. "Can't you see I've suffered enough?! Watching other people in pain at my expense?! Heal the Captain first!"

Edited 2008-11-15 08:01 (UTC)

Hanatarou didn't know the boy who was attempting to console Artemis, but at least one of them was able to do something useful. The healer could only meet Hitsugaya's eyes for a fraction of a second before he was forced to look down at the floor again, but he could still almost feel the captain's gaze boring into him.

Rather than any accusations or lectures, though, all he received was an order, and the healer nodded quickly before crouching beside Artemis. "Ah, F-Fowl-san, please hold still," he begged, reaching toward the boy's shoulder with his bandages in hand. Even if Artemis insisted, Hitsugaya still outranked him and orders were orders. Now if only his patient would be cooperative enough to allow him to carry them out.

"An alpha cares for his pack first," Toboe murmured softly, reaching up to smooth Artemis's hair as he'd seen humans do when comforting one in distress. He looked sorrowfully over Artemis's shoulder, down at the man he'd hardly known, and despite any fear he would feel at doing so--Toboe wished for a moment that he could trade places with him.

Hitsugaya would have liked time to mourn, to go into a private corner and forget the world; unfortunately such options were not available to him. As Hanatarou tended to Artemis, he glanced up at Toboe. "Renji's room...M42...get his sword and his books and bring them here." If someone didn't get them tonight, they'd be swept up and lost. Renji's final wishes had to be honored.

"No," Artemis snapped, trying to push Hanatarou away. "Heal Hitsugaya first, I'm fine, I can at least stand without bleeding out of my eyes."

He knew it was useless, though. Hitsugaya had given Hanatarou an order, and unlike some foolish boys, Hanatarou would actually follow this order. Artemis struggled to push Hanatarou's hands out of the way for a bit, but finally gave up and let the healer work.

"Get his uniform as well," Artemis murmured to Toboe, his voice hoarse and tired. "He won't be buried within these walls."

It was almost like trying to patch up Ichigo all over again, with how uncooperative Artemis was being. Having a bottle of shinten with him would come in handy at a time like this, but sadly, it was gone along with all of his other healing supplies, leaving Hanatarou to attempt to get a bandage made of a torn sheet on Artemis' shoulder. "N-no, Fowl-san, I have to...please hold still..."

Fortunately the other finally stopped struggling, and Hanatarou breathed a faint sigh of relief and closed his eyes, a faint green glow tracing his hands as they hovered just above the boy's wounds. Now that he'd had the experience of healing with the limits placed upon him here, he knew what to expect; the dizziness he ignored, as well as the pain that started at the base of his neck and slowly swelled to encompass the rest of his head.

He pushed on through the weakness that threatened to overwhelm him, willing the torn flesh to seal itself back together, and it almost did. It almost healed, though the newly-formed tissue was still weak and likely to tear again if stressed; the injury was still there, but at least Artemis' life was no longer in danger.

That was enough, and the healer had to be content with that, as for the second time that night he momentarily lost the struggle against his own limitations. The glow abruptly disappeared from his hands, and an instant later Hanatarou slowly toppled forward onto his patient.

Toboe squeaked as Hanatarou fell forward into himself and Artemis, catching the healer and...well, now what was he supposed to do with him? He had to go, but just leaving them there...

After a few moments, Toboe managed to manhandle Hanatarou over to the wall and lean him against it. "I'll be right back." He'd run as fast as he could...

He wasn't going to let anything else happen to them if he could help it. But if he wasn't there, he wouldn't be able to. He would just have to be fast.

Edited 2008-11-18 07:22 (UTC)

"I'm fine," Hitsugaya retorted to Artemis. "I just overdid it a little."

Then Hanatarou collapsed. In some ways he was grateful for the distraction, it kept him from focusing too much on the dead man who lay at his feet. "Damnit, Hanatarou!" he cursed.

"Don't blame him!" Artemis snapped, still coming off the earlier hysteria he'd expressed. "At least he did what you told him to do."

The boy pulled himself up, still clutching his shoulder. It was sore, but Hanatarou had really done a number on it--and thus, himself. Artemis yanked the tubes out of his nose and discarded the heavy tank, pulling himself over to Hitsugaya and Hanatarou.

"What can I do? Tell me how I can help."

Hanatarou didn't quite lose consciousness, but for a moment was skirting the edges of it. He was aware enough to realize that someone had caught him and, after a moment, left him propped against a wall. Well, that's good, he told himself somewhat fuzzily. Landing on the person he'd just healed couldn't be good for his injuries, after all.

At the familiar sound of someone cursing his name, the healer blinked a little, trying to focus on the people around him despite a wave of vertigo. "'m sorry, taichou," he mumbled, with a faint sigh. "Don' worry, 'm all righ'..."

He slowly straightened up again, glancing over at Artemis as concern overrode the lingering headache. "O-oh, be careful, please!" The wound hadn't entirely healed, and he didn't want to have to fix it again. Not tonight, at least. But there was still someone else there, and Hanatarou hesitantly turned toward Hitsugaya. "Did...um...I can t-try to heal you, too, taichou...?"

"No," Hitsugaya said quietly. "It's no one's fault."

"Help by sitting back and resting. There's nothing we can do, damnit. Just...Toboe's off to get Renji's personals, and as long as he has them they won't be lost. Rest. Mourn. Be ready for tomorrow night." Tomorrow night was not going to be fun, but it had to happen.

Hanatarou he looked at briefly. "I'm fine," he said. "I just overdid my kidou. No sense wasting your energy healing my use of energy."

Edited 2008-11-19 09:17 (UTC)

Toboe was breathing heavily by the time he made it back upstairs, yet another reminder that he wasn't the same as he used to be--as a wolf, he could run for miles without feeling winded at all, and much faster at that. Running while carrying things was also definitely strange, since it interfered with using his arms to balance. He'd nearly fallen more than a few times making his way back.

After the run, he was tired. He knew he'd recover--the tired was nothing strange, he was just used to it coming after far longer. The group looked little better after his return, save for Artemis. Hopefully...daylight would come soon.

"I took whatever I could find that smelled...right," Toboe said softly, sadly, voice harsh from heavy breathing. The two bundles hopefully contained everything he was supposed to get.

Nightshift 36: Main Hallway, 2-West

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject