Day 36: Waiting Room/Lobby 2

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Okita hadn't been expecting it when his nurse suddenly appeared in the Game Room. He'd expected to be left alone like last week, but instead she gently took him by the arm and told him he needed to say goodbye to Kaden for now. Okita assumed it was time for his visitor and waved goodbye to him, only to be led off himself. The swordsman had followed obediently into the Sun Room, but when he tried to go off to another room, she stopped him. "Not today, Julian."

Not today? Something about his nurse's demeanor seemed off, almost as if she were worried about something. It wasn't until she led him out of the Sun Room that he understood what was going on. He had a visitor. There were only so many people that would come to visit him in a place like this. His sisters, Tetsu, Kondou or... Okita didn't want to think about the last option.

Taking a step into the waiting room, he stopped at the door and turned to look at his nurse. "Are you sure you're not mistaken?" he asked, feeling actual fear for the first time in a long while. If this wasn't some strange punishment/joke for behaving poorly in the chapel, he didn't know what to do. Badou's graffiti was still on his hand and he quickly slipped that hand into his pocket. He could feel the pen there, clipped to the inside of his waistband. The nurse shook her head and moved to the side of the room, keeping a close watch on him as he stayed by the door, trying to hide his anxiety by feigning interest in the strange magazines on a table nearby.

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This couldn't be happening. How could Hijikata believe this place and their lies? How could he have left when they had so much to do? For a moment, Okita thought that this was just a clever lie, a man who looked like his leader without being him. Looking into his eyes though, he could see the same man who had held out his hand to a bloody child and gave him a place to be.

Years of walking at Hijikata's side had given him something like a sixth sense for detecting him and even in this lie, he could feel him there somewhere. A blessing and a curse because, on the one hand, Hijikata was alive, but on the other, he was so far away now. Even standing right in front of him, Okita felt like he was staring at his back as Hijikata left for good. It would be so easy to just pretend and give in to the lies that he was Julian Ikeda, but there were people depending on him - on them both - and Okita wasn't about to let Hijikata fall just because this place did something to him. He wasn't going to give up on him.

But that didn't mean he was happy about all this and in the end, he slowly let go of Hijikata's shirt. Western clothing suited Hijikata, but it still didn't feel right beneath Okita's fingertips. He couldn't hold onto it while looking up at that face and not think it should have been rougher, and dark blue, lapels folded left over right, tied around the waist. Things were going wrong, so very wrong.

"I'll find a way to bring you back," he murmured under his breath. Everyone was waiting for them at home and if they didn't go back, they'd all die. Tetsu, Kondou, Susumu, Harada, Toudou, Yamanami - all of them, everyone would perish. It would be easy to live blissfully in the future, but he couldn't. That wasn't what a samurai did. "I'll find a way to bring you back to your senses, Hijikata-san. Somehow. I haven't given up on you."

But now it was time to go and Okita couldn't bring himself to leave Hijikata's side. Instead, he took a step closer, wanting to breathe in the scent of tobacco and linen that was only just faintly there. He had to remember this for the rest of his time here. Until Okita could break Hijikata free of whatever was binding him to the lies, he would never again see his commander walking these halls. "But I'm sorry, Hijikata-san." His hand slipped into his waistband and gripped the pen hiding there. "I can't walk away from you."

Never in his life would he ever hurt his leader. Never would he think of doing it. But the nurses didn't know that and he needed to be dragged away or he'd begin to turn to the lies, just so he wouldn't be alone anymore. Whipping the pen out, he closed his eyes and made an overly exaggerated move at stabbing Hijikata in the shoulder, knowing the nurses would be waiting on this.

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He didn't know what to say or do; he'd gotten nothing more than a sigh out before the pen suddenly appeared, and then the orderlies who had been watching for something like this were there, grabbing Okita and dragging him away. It happened in slow motion almost, time competing with the idea that Julian would attack him, because Julian wouldn't do such a thing. He knew that, even though he'd seen it, because something in his head told him that it'd all been a trick.

The nurses didn't care, however. They'd already stuck a needle into Julian's neck, and now someone had come to lead him away. Michael looked at her with a scowl, staying just where he was until Julian was out of sight.