damned_institute | Day 29: Chapel

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Day 29: Chapel

Hiei didn't give a damn about religious services, meditation, or pretending to be social. The always sudden waking after night put him in a bad mood, this one particularly so. Even with Kurikara licking him like some perverted moron, the warmth the dragon provided was welcome in Hiei's bed, and missing when he woke, giving the surrounding air a greater sense of chill.

But the perfect thing to relieve his anger might just be making an appearance that morning, and that at least gave Hiei hope for a decent day.

Hopefully Kurikara and Kurama both would be clever enough to figure it out for themselves. Without hesitation, Hiei demanded to be led to the temple, taking a seat in one of the rear pews. Humans had a way of overdoing things, and this place wasn't really much exception to that. Granted Hiei's limited knowledge prevented him from realizing there were much more outrageous churches, but to the demon, the colored pieces of glass and polished wood seemed to be much.

It didn't matter, however. Either could be turned into weapons, perfect objects to slice into that damned head doctor's throat or bash in his skull. That was a thought worth grinning about.

[Feel free to pester. Just, uh, be aware that he's not exactly nice.]

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HK sighed, slightly disappointed. He had no idea what that was. "Statement: I do not know what a 'Noah' is." And the meatbag was going to be confused by any definition of 'droid' that he gave... Oh well. It would at least provide a small amount of entertainment.

"Definition: A droid is an intelligent mechanical being, far more capable and durable than any meatbag." He watched to see how long it would take the meatbag's thought process to get a handle on all those words with so many syllables in them.

Good. Only Noah were supposed to know what Noah were, and the Earl, and Akuma, which were exactly what this guy was explaining with his definition of a dro-eed. Well, except for the "intelligent" remark, but she guessed they could be considered that so far as being able to speak and think went. Level ones couldn't do any of that, but the higher levels possessed some level of intellect. Still, they were pretty stupid in her book. Underlings usually were.

Skipping over his first statement, she grabbed his dro-eed definition and ran with it. "Got those. We call 'em... Akuma," she yawned unintentionally, "They're minions. 'N take orders..."

Though he was blurry, Rhode was pretty certain he had a human shape. He said he was a dro-eed, but maybe they could take on human skins just like Akuma. She supposed that different places called things different names.

"Dro-eed" sounded stupid.

"Objection: I am insulted by the insinuation that I am merely a drone. I am far more intelligent than any meatbag, and more than capable of creating mass slaughter of my own free will." Honestly! Whatever a 'Noah' was, they needed to have some sense knocked into them. Thinking they were better than droids.

His anger went ignored; Rhode herself was angry enough not to care for his offense. "Whassa drone?" Well, he hadn't specified that there were levels of... whatever he was... which is what he seemed to be indicating.

Drone sounded more like an Akuma, were that the case.

Then he said something that seemed to override whatever drousiness she was still feeling. Enough of an override to make her grin devilishly, "Slaughter's fun."

And enough to manage complete sentences, it seemed.

"Definition: Menial labor droids programmed to perform non-intelligent tasks such as salvage, mining and sanitation." HK started contemplating taking out one of the scalpels he had hidden in his clothing. "Simplification: A very stupid metal thing that does very boring jobs." There. Would the meatbag be able to get all of that, now?

...The meatbag couldn't be faulted for priorities, though. "Agreement: Of course it is."

Bah, this guy was confusing. He said some fun things though.

"Akuma dun do that," she persisted. Even with his definition, the only thing that made his drones like Akuma were that they were unintelligent. "They kill. Dun hafta be told. But th' Earl makes 'em, so they obey us."

He wanted simple, she'd give him simple.

"Like pets," she decided, finally landing on a good term. "We're better at killing though. S'fun." And really, the Akuma were just the Earl's side project, they weren't actually needed. The Noah were good enough to purge the world themselves. Akuma just came in handy for mass killings that weren't worth her family's time to deal with.

"Query: Earl?" HK did have a list of more names than a meatbag could ever remember, devoted to possible assassination targets. He might be able to recognize at least the name from his files, if this meatbag was even from the same dimension as he was. That did tend to complicate things.

"Statement: Well, I am most certainly no meatbag's pet." Except possibly the Master's, and he hoped that he would never be referred to by that term. "I am completely above that level, or any meatbag's capabilities."

The Millennium Earl simplified... not an easy thing to do. Even thinking of the fun things she could do once the Earl came to get her didn't get her mind to think of any simplified explanation for him. Was there a simple explanation for the Millennium Earl?

Doubtful.

"Yup, the Earl," she settled on, not giving anything away. She wasn't really allowed to give anything away, so that was as good as he'd get.

"You mi'ht not be, but Akuma are. Not fo' meatbags... Noah," she corrected. She still assumed that he was using the meatbag title for humans, and she certainly wasn't one of those inferior weaklings.

HK decided it wasn't worth following that line of inquiry. Correcting the meatbag as to their status was more important. "Negatory: Unless Noah happen to be inorganic like droids, then they are meatbags. The term encompasses all organic life forms, although humans are the most prolific among them."

Really, why did meatbags have such difficulty understanding this? They were membrane-bound, watery sacks of meat. Thus, meatbags. It really was so simple.

"I dun hafta explain Noah t' you..." she finally told him. She doubted he'd understand even if she did; he was so dense. He did have some things right, but he also had some things wrong, and some things she didn't even understand! What use was there in correcting him then? She wasn't really in the condition to correct him anyway.

However much she may have wanted to.

Really, he was calling humans meatbags, and she was anything but. Well, except for when she was taunting Allen Walker. Then she could be human. Otherwise she was no more human that a dro-eed, if this person was even one of those.

Still, he talked really weird. Now, where had she heard that before? She knew it at least sounded familiar, so where...? Oh!

"You're th' one who likes eye-gougin'! From th' boards!" she exclaimed, still a bit weakly. She knew it had been important! Some weird person had been writing like he was talking on the boards. He had sounded fun.

So this was the one he had been talking to? HK was not so impressed at the moment. "Affirmative: Yes, I am. And it is entertaining. They squish quite pleasingly. And it causes meatbags of all species so much pain."

"Mmmm, they do!"

Whoever he was, he was arrogant and still spoke really weird, but if he liked killing and stuff, then he couldn't be all bad. She had no doubt he was from another kind of world than her own - such disrespect for a Noah when he was pretty much calling himself an Akuma was unheard of - so she'd let him slide with a lot of comments just based on ignorance.

Maybe he'd make her miss Lord Tamaki.

"You like callin' things meatbags, huh?" she asked. That last comment had indicated that he didn't just use the term for humans.

"Affirmative: While it later became an imperative in my coding, it was only as a result of my own repeated use of the term. In addition, the distress it caused in the original 'meatbag' to constantly be referred to as such was most amusing." Malak had been such a wonderful test subject. Not only had he cemented HK's love for the epithet, but he also gave HK a legitimate reason to test his strategies in combating Force sensitives.

It was a pity he'd never actually been allowed to kill Malak back then. That disgusting traitor to the Master! If he could be killed a second time, I'd make good on my promise of removing his entrails!

She blinked at his explanation. It was getting easier to follow what he said, though she wasn't sure if she was just getting used to his strange speech or if she was finally getting over the intense amount of bloodloss. Whatever it was, she was glad to have her coherency back. Now to work on her still affected speech.

"Why not bloodbags?" she asked, falling again to what she would have dubbed humans given his mindset. "Or do your meatbags not all bleed?"

She was pretty convinced by now that he wasn't just referencing humans, but all living things were supposed to have blood, weren't they? Well, save for trees, but she'd like to hear his explanation for wanting to call those meatbags as well, if he did. Blood was more fun than meat unless a dro-eed was some kind of carnivore. That'd make him even more interesting to her!

"Statement: Not all meatbags have an equivalent of blood, although there are only a few isolated species. I did consider various alternatives to the term at first, but none have quite the same effect on meatbags. They seem most universally offended by the term."

Those that he wanted to offend, at least. The ones that were not affected by the term usually knew their place in the universe- as inferior, squishy beings.

Whoa, things didn't have blood? Rhode hoped never to deal with those; they'd be such a disappointment! No fun at all! Hopefully that goody-goody had blood considering the things she intended to do to him later. Oh, and brain juices.

"Still like bloodbag better." And she probably always would. Her special kind of logic was at work once again. "Blood tastes better," she yawned.

This guy was sadly mistaken if he thought the term could offend her or that it didn't based solely on the fact that she knew her place. Rhode just didn't offend easy. She was too warped already, and besides that, she did know her place - it was far above any dro-eed no matter how special he thought himself. She was special too - the Noah were chosen.

"Guess your meatbags don't regenerate then," she tried. The conversation on the board was coming back to her in pieces, but she was at least remembering the important parts now. She'd told him about how Allen Walker's eye grew back after being gouged out. Had she made any mention of the Noah regeneration...?

Yuck. HK was not in favor of the idea of putting any meatbag juices in his mouth. He already found it disgusting enough that meatbags drank the lactate of others, anyway.

He hoped that preferring the term 'meatbag' meant this one thought he was partial to injecting that instead. Because he wasn't.

"Negatory: They do not regenerate. Some heal uncommonly fast, but if parts are damaged beyond repair, then they cannot regrow. Qualification: At least with most species. Those that do tend to make uninteresting targets."

Now that she thought about it, she probably hadn't mentioned anything about the Noah on that board. She'd put up those pictures (with little effect), but nothing mentioning the Noah or what they were. Then she'd definitely not told him about the Noah regenerations. Just Allen Walker and his adorable little cursed eye.

Oh, but she should be focusing on his answer. "Mmmmmm, but if they heal fast, then you c'n keep hurtin' them over 'n over again. That's not "uninterestin'," she defended, "it's fun! They'll scream more, and bleed more when you stab 'em!"

Of course, Allen Walker was the only exorcist she'd ever dealt with that had any kind of regenerative ability, and it hadn't been at the level of the Noah's own ability. That woman with the clock had done something with that Innocence that one time, so it didn't count. She didn't know how or when Allen Walker's eye had grown back - she knew it had because of what Tyki'd said - but since it had, he had to have some kind of ability, right? How else would you get a gouged eye back?

There were probably ways, but Rhode preferred thinking that her Allen-kun was special. Just. Like. Her~.

"Statement: Maybe for some. But the species capable of re-growing extra limbs generally do not react in such an entertaining manner as humans do when hurt." Humans never took maiming with any grace whatsoever. Unless they were preternaturally stoic or deadened to the pain, they all tended to thrash around and make lots of noise. HK truly enjoyed the times he was sent out to slowly assassinate meatbags.

"Contemplation: A human with such abilities would be very fun to mutilate. The real problem with human meatbags is that they invariably die after massive trauma. As long as extended torture was the desired activity, then it would make things so much more interesting." If not, then it would be bad for his duties as an assassin. As fun as Jedi could be to kill, he hated it when the apparently dead ones got back up again and attempted to forcefully disassemble him. That was just unsporting of them.

"But it's my human that regenerates," she pouted, again referencing just Allen Walker. This guy really was thick when it came to her logic.

She was about to scold him for not listening when he made up for his thickness with further commentary. "Yes, now you're getting it!" She didn't know she was speaking to an assassin, so she felt like this was somehow a learning experience for him where torture was concerned. "Torture's always fun~"

The only real difference between them was that she preferred when the nearly dead enemies tried those last attempts to kill her. Rhode adored when enemies made that one last attempt to finish her. They were usually so bruised and bloodied by that point that they made their own blood splash about. Rhode only had to sit back and watch while they struggled. She just knew the last thing they heard were her shrieks of laughter - a fitting end for things that were so weak.

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Day 29: Chapel

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