Day 58: Cafeteria

[gald_digger]

Anise woke up feeling lucky to be alive. She still felt a bit waterlogged, even though her skin, hair, and clothes were completely dry. During last night's adventures, she'd swallowed a lot of water, and it still felt heavy and disgusting in her stomach. Her arms and legs were tired from treading water. Lying still in her bed, she still kind of felt like she was floating and bobbing in the water.

But she was alive.

Knowing how close she came to death last night, and remembering the lengths her friends had gone to in order to save her, there was no way Anise could let a little discomfort get her down. She had to be at her best today so she wouldn't seem ungrateful to Guy and Claude. On that note, she had to remember to thank them properly, now that she was better able to express herself.

While getting ready, Anise was surprised to actually run into Claude that morning. He came to her room asking for the notebook he stored there (or maybe it was an excuse to see her cute face again), so Anise happily located it and handed it over. She was pretty tired, but the big smile she gave him was genuine. Who wouldn't be happy to see her savior so soon after a dramatic rescue?

After he left, Anise finished re-tying her pigtails into a low position so the military beret would fit on her head, and then she was ready! Even though her stomach wasn't feeling that great, she figured sitting down to a decent meal would help normalize it. And luckily for her, she was among the few who had the privilege of eating such a meal. Anise filled a plate with french toast topped with syrup and fruit, accompanied by small portions of each of the available side dishes.

It looked like she was early, which meant there weren't a lot of people around. That was okay, though. Anise could get a good head start on her meal before any company came around. She sat down at a table by herself and started on her sausage first.

[for Tolten!]

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[unit67.livejournal.com]

Lily bit her lip and looked down, realizing that she might have made an error in being so frank when she really just meant to explain why she thought the place wasn't so terrible. Was it a bad thing to be a child soldier? It didn't necessarily imply that she lost control, that she was capable of hurting her friends. It didn't reveal anything about the dark voice, about her own weakness against it. There were others, those who weren't a threat...people like Heine, like Giovanni, like most of the others. Anyone would want to be friends with them. They wouldn't be scared. Still, she chose her words carefully, a bit nervously and not entirely free of shame. Her last memory, her hands slick with Heine's blood, coated her memory with warm red. And Giovanni...

But she couldn't talk about that that. Not yet. Not ever. No one would be friends with a person like her, and as much as Lily hated twisting the truth, she hated her loneliness even more. And the voice, it fed on that emotion. It whispered most forcefully through weakness, clamored for revenge against those who would reject her.

So no. She wouldn't talk. She'd answer his question, give the answers Heine might have given. She'd hide for as long as she could.

"Yes," she finally said. Lily seemed to have lost interest in her food, not that it was that interesting to begin with. "I mean...I think that's what you could call it. We were going to escape, though." That, or degrade into monsters. "I didn't want to hurt anyone."

It was safe. A safe enough answer. Mikado couldn't guess the truth from that. Could he? He didn't sound disgusted when he asked the question. She watched him for a second, trying to read his expression, but his mention of cats quickly raced past her anxiety.

"I love cats," she said with a grin. "They make this quiet sound, like their whole body is vibrating, and they have little pink tongues, and they rest against you when they're going to sleep, and-" And again, she'd gotten carried away with excitement. Mikado knew what cats were like. Everyone did. "I'm sorry," she said, glancing down. "It's just that back home, we...I never saw a cat before."

[ofthemotions]

Her expression seemed to fall, and Mikado half-wished he could take back what he asked. Except it was there, for better or worse, and the truth was what was important in the end. Even if he didn't have the right to know it. Her expression had guaranteed the answer before she even spoke it, and the way she spoke, without coyness or subterfuge, made him believe her. When Lily paused, Mikado smiled, nodding once. "Then this place is better, then. I'm glad that you did get out, one way or the other."

He thought for a moment, then continued. "And maybe you'll end up seeing your friends here? I've met someone I know, and I heard there's a couple more as well." The fact caught up belatedly. Wow. A child-soldier. Had she been kidnapped to... Africa or China? Mikado had no idea what countries still used those. She looked too European--did Russia have child-soldiers?

Mikado thought of Simon suddenly, and mentally shuddered. He could have been one, for certain.

His smile widened peacefully as she spoke, watching her. Yes, it was really cute. She spoke without shame or embarrassment--ah, he spoke too soon. He waved a hand. "No, no, it's fine, Lily-san. It's nice that you have something you like so much." If all she knew was fighting, a cat must be something so unique. "And it's called purring. They do it when they're really happy, I think."

Part of him wanted to question her fiercely on the fact of her background, curious about the details. He asked nothing. She seemed on guard about it, and there might be some unpleasant memories attached. Maybe some other time....