damned_institute | NIGHTSHIFT 43: M1

[from here (http://community.livejournal.com/damned/703812.html).]

For a moment, when Endrance rounded the corner, he looked away, flushing a moment. He wasn't entirely sure what was happening in the room at the end of that hallway, but it certainly sounded like...something that would be far too rude to give further thought to. He shook his head, pushing those thoughts away, then moved on, stopping just outside Haseo's room.

There was the moment's temptation to fling the door open, but Endrance really didn't think Haseo would take terribly kindly to that, given what had happened the last time. That gave him a moment to think, then, and he paced back and forth down the hallway, absorbed in thought. Who was it I sensed earlier? I still don't think it was Atoli...then, was it...

He thought back to everything Haseo had said that first morning at breakfast. If he went so far as to betray us all, then I can't put it past him - past this place? No, past him, to get at Haseo by acting like a visitor. That would explain the strong feeling...

Endrance sighed heavily. If this had been any other place, he would have been running the minute he'd felt that sensation. But as it was, what could he have done? The thought troubled him.

Edited 2009-08-30 02:02 (UTC)

Soon after the doors unlocked, Kanji headed out. It wasn't like he was in some kind of rush or was busy. Hell, he didn't even have a plan. But the last thing he wanted was for a repeat of that last time. He'd rather avoid having to watch... you know. That. Or whatever. At least, if he could help it.

And speak of the devil, as he was trying to remember which way he should be going to get out of the bedroom areas, his flashlight landed on that same blue-haired person from last time. At this point, it was kind of impossible for him to go unnoticed now. ...He didn't know why he was worrying about it. It's not like he was obligated to be nice to his roommate's... er, company. But somehow just walking off seemed like it wouldn't be right.

...But neither was just staring, which was what Kanji was doing. He glanced away, somewhat embarrassed. "Uh. Hey."

That pleasantry over and done with, Kanji turned and quickly walked down the hall, passing the other person awkwardly while not looking at them much.

[doo dee doo, oh! What's this place over here (http://community.livejournal.com/damned/702746.html?thread=57999386#t57999386)?]

Edited 2009-08-31 07:04 (UTC)

Despite specifically asking them to meet him, Haseo found himself reluctant when it came down to facing his allies. Before, he'd already felt somewhat guilty regarding the previous night, and after being both physically and emotionally knocked down by the Institute's shenanigans the entire day, in many ways he would have preferred to actually go through with just barring the door and staying there until things reset again.

And yet when Kanji left, the Adept Rogue found himself getting his things together anyway, trying to put aside his hesitation. In addition to Endrance and Tsukasa, he'd told Leon he would come by in order to obtain another sword. Plus... if he expected them to tell him things, then... he'd have to face his own problems, regardless of lack of resolution. There wasn't really a way around it.

There was a slight problem in that with the sword and knife he already had, he really didn't have the handspace to carry the flashlight or much else as well. Considering his friends were likely to have their own and were supposed to meet him nearby though, he passed it by and entered the hall. He caught the beam of a flashlight and stood silent, recognizing Endrance but... not really willing to say anything until he was noticed in return.

Endrance looked up when Haseo's roommate left, but didn't have a chance to reply to the greeting before he was down the hall and out of sight. With that done, he moved back up the hallway, and was almost to the door when Haseo stepped outside. He might normally have run back up, but something in the Rogue's expression seemed to ask him to hold back any large-scale displays of emotion or affection.

When he stepped forward, it was with that thought firmly in mind; Endrance stopped a few steps short of where he might have normally, looking Haseo over briefly. You look as if you've had your heart ripped out and haphazardly sewed back in...what could have possibly happened to you...?

"...I felt someone else's presence earlier," he said, quietly. "If it's who I suspect, then...I'm sorry. If there was any way I could have done so, I would have been by your side immediately..."

"Huh? You--?" Haseo didn't bother to hide his surprise at that admission, taking a moment to study Endrance curiously. Had he always been so sensitive to that kind of thing? He remembered that there had been brief mention of something like that the first time they ran into each other at the Institute, but now, just because of that, Endrance had apparently known something was wrong- even though Haseo was fairly sure that elsewhere there wasn't much indication. He wasn't certain if that was a good thing or bad.

Well, there was also the fact that he probably looked like shit. How could he not, with the memory of Ovan's smug words and maybe-Shino's reaction to the whole encounter still burning fresh in his mind? How, with what they had said, plus the blatant display of a particularly symbolic ring on her hand? He couldn't even--

He put out his arm toward the wall and then leaned against it. "Okay. That's... interesting," he replied, then sighed and used the heel of his off hand to half rub at his forehead and move the hair out of his face. He was aware he should probably confirm Endrance's suspicions one way or the other, but he paused and got caught up as he tried to think how on earth to phrase it.

"Even if I hadn't sensed it...it only took one look at you to know something was wrong, Haseo..." Endrance stepped forward then, slowly closing the distance between them, but staying towards Haseo's right side. He didn't know why, exactly, but had the feeling putting himself behind the Rogue was a very bad idea.

"As I said before, I don't know how I was able to sense it, but I knew that something had happened. And...there are only a few people who would make you react that strongly. I think it was your reaction that I was sensing, more than anything else," he explained. "I don't think it was Atoli. You would be sad to see her, but this was something darker. I've been worried since then, because of what you said the first morning you got here..."

A few more steps forward, then, and that distance was closed almost completely. "And even now, it's still affecting you. That much is clear. I'm worried, Haseo..." Endrance moved then, lightly putting his arm around Haseo's shoulders. "If I could have done anything at all without being stopped, I would have."

Another ironic situation noted then: despite looking like a character from a videogame, the luxury of hiding behind the screen was still put aside, substituted with how good he was at hiding things in real life. It hardly seemed fair- it had been much easier when it was just a game, where if it became too much, he could just walk away for a bit, and where he was obligated to participate in school and work and family issues, which took his mind away from what was going on in 'The World' at least for short times.

In fact, it was probably a welcome veil on both his part and that of the people who knew him. Had the PKs populating the game who knew firsthand of 'The Terror of Death' been aware of how often he used to stray from mere anger when hunting down 'Tri-Edge,' or how much it had affected him when Sakaki was trying so hard to tear him down, perhaps things would have supported an entirely different conclusion. With this and from he knew, Haseo wondered if Endrance would have been able to go through with his false betrayal if it had been staged in this weird place stuck halfway between the worlds of real and online. He'd admitted before that he wasn't incapable of getting tripped up himself, but to have it reflected with that level of concern behind it was disconcerting.

What was also disconcerting was how Endrance thought it okay to invade his space. The word 'shameless' came to mind as Haseo made eye contact, though the thought and his reaction was more exasperated than anything resembling resentment. "I know that," he said evenly, subconsciously leaning away in what room he had. He paused before he acknowledged the earlier observations, and blinked. "I expected Atoli," he answered, "But you're right. Ovan was here in the building, and... Shino was with him."

What would I do, if this was happening from behind the screen, rather than this strange place? I... What he might have done was turn away from the screen for a moment, close his eyes and think of what someone else might do in the situation. As it was, though, that veil had been stripped away; he wasn't able to hide, or hug a pillow in place of a person, or even stare at the waves outside his window. It didn't matter that he wouldn't want to go out and feel the ocean air, or look at the clouds without glass in the way, it was sometimes just enough to look at it.

More than that...there was the feeling that relying on anyone else's words wouldn't be enough. There was both fear and a strange feeling of strength in that thought. Anyone could say something comforting, but the words would ring hollow without sincerity behind them. Endrance felt that in spades; it was an almost painful kind of sincerity, the kind that might have broken him had he not experienced the pain of losing someone twice, having them brought back, and losing them again. That last time...thinking about it was painful still, but the experience had changed him for the better. It was a debt that couldn't be repaid simply. He didn't realize he'd moved closer and pulled Haseo into an embrace until it had already been done.

He didn't let go as he answered that statement. "Shino? But...I didn't think that possible." It was strange, in a way, to accept Ovan's appearance as one of the Institute's horrible tricks, but...it wasn't so surprising. They did like to strike at one's weak points. Even so, though, he hadn't thought them capable of waking someone from a coma caused by AIDA. "They were together, then...no wonder you reacted so strongly. I won't ask if you're all right now, but...will you be?"

Edited 2009-09-01 18:27 (UTC)

Okay, that-- what. In addition to dramatic entrances and executing surprise attacks with impeccable timing, it appeared Endrance also had a way of slipping past defenses outside of battle. Like a... hug ninja, or something. Haseo went absolutely still and then stiffened, mind short-circuiting in the most helpful manner. "Hhhha... let me go or I'll stab you," he finally announced, painfully aware of the blood rushing to his face.

Haseo managed to get an arm between them, waiting until he had Endrance at arms-length before he answered, still burning in embarrassment and throwing a wary glance along the hall. "I don't even know if it was really her," he said slowly, but wasn't sure himself how he felt about that. She seemed happy enough, but the way she was... as he had said to Ovan, he had doubts regarding that as an acceptable cure.

The bandages on his arm received a glare as he looked down, and the urge to mess with them required strong resistance with the way the wounds stung and itched beneath the layers. At the moment they looked to him like a beacon projecting his weakness, regardless of how he'd actually gotten them, and it suddenly seemed imperative that he do something about it. It was apparently autumn-conditions here anyway, so....

He backed off deliberately and turned into his room with a semi-muttered "hold on." Despite his earlier choice in leaving it behind, he strode to the bed and gathered up his flashlight. Sighing, he bent to retrieve one of the previously-dumped sweatshirts, but the instant he did so, something changed in the wall. He glanced over sharply, feeling his stomach twist in recognition.

Moving back over, he reached out and uneasily put his hand on the cool surface, half-kneeling on the bed. Solid. His brows knitted together as he followed the wall's plane in every direction, but it stayed the same as it was before.

"...Did you see that?"

Edited 2009-09-02 00:45 (UTC)

Endrance couldn't say he hadn't been expecting a rebuke at some point, and as such, actually smiled just a little at that push backwards, bowing just a little as he stepped backwards. If Haseo was threatening people, that at least meant he wasn't feeling quite as...the words 'frozen up' came to mind, when he thought of how the other had been a few moments before. Most people wouldn't consider a death threat a positive thing, but in that particular case, coming from that particular person, it might as well have been a smile, and Endrance was happy enough with that.

Without thinking about it, he followed Haseo inside, but this time, kept just a bit of distance between them, standing just a little more than arms-length away. That last comment...he didn't want to be the one to say it, but if that had been Ovan, then Shino either had an identical twin or they had been able to bring her back. The latter was what he would have liked to be the truth, but...he had a sinking feeling that it wasn't. Endrance sighed softly, about to make the point, but then froze in place.

Was that...yes. The same thing he'd noticed just after coming out of his own room had happened again. He stepped forward a bit unsteadily, resting his right hand on the metal bed frame. It was just as solid as it should have been.

"...yes, Haseo...you don't think it's Kite's influence again?"

If that's true, then maybe this means that he doesn't like flashlights, Haseo thought, letting his hand slide down and off the wall as he settled more of his weight on the bed. ...not that I could blame him. The Rogue recalled the crack that had been etched into the being's face with vivid clarity, as well as what had caused it- incidentally, the same flashlight he had with him now, which he lowered and now set on the bed as well.

"I don't know," he replied, "there was something weird going on yesterday after dark too. Like things were being edited." He turned to face Endrance, but at the same time caught the shape of something lying beneath the covers and a tossed-aside garment with his hand. He paused, curious, then tugged at the blanket until it came loose from the end of the bed.

The baffled expression that passed over his face was likely an odd contrast to what he'd been sporting before. "These are the shoes I was wearing yesterday," he observed unnecessarily, pulling them out one at a time.

There were trainers in the cupboard when Tsukasa opened it. Honest to god actual trainers and they made Tsukasa squeak a little to see them. On closer inspection, they were the ones from yesterday, a little battered but mercifully clean and free of blood and gore. He pulled them on gratefully, glad to have something other than light slippers to wear.

He grabbed the frying pan too; embarrassing a weapon as it was, it was still something. With a nod to Kvothe, Tsukasa stepped out into the corridor and headed to Haseo's room. He knocked lightly on the door. "Haseo? Endrance?"

For those few moments, Endrance had completely forgotten that there was a third person coming in to meet with them that night. He was a little surprised, but quickly regained his composure, for the most part. There was still the faintest trace of a flush on his face when he turned to answer the door. "Tsukasa, hello..."

He glanced around the room again - no more signs that anything was changing. "Did you see that, a few moments ago...it was just like the entry room, only it didn't stay like that. We were just discussing whether or not it might have been 'Kite'..."

Endrance wasn't going to touch the topic of Haseo's visitors - if he wanted to bring it up himself, that was fine, but to speak about it without prior prompting felt like it would have been a betrayal.

As Endrance turned to let Tsukasa in, there was a brief moment in which dismay flickered over Haseo's face and was then hastily covered up, even if it would have likely gone unnoticed in the darkness. It wasn't just that he was still off-center- with both people he had primarily been hanging around (and who were familiar with his situation, though Alkaid had a hand in too and she was absent- he'd have to talk to her again later), it meant they'd have to get back into the questions that Haseo would have preferred to fall on others with more experience in thinking things through.

Or more precise to his discomfort, the questions regarding their actions from the day and night before. Like how he had demanded a spell from Tsukasa that contributed to driving them from the grocery store into the midst of zombie-infested streets. In light of everything, what the others had been up to didn't seem quite as important as it had earlier. So, despite his misgivings over the process of brainstorming to get answers over going out to beat things up, he decided to go through with the current topic with a frustrated sigh.

"I'm not sure that even matters," he started, sitting up straighter and pulling the high-topped shoes (boots?) into his lap. "Remember, we're in the body of our player characters. Things keep changing or resetting, and now the intercom system and even the walls seem to be glitching up. I can't shake the feeling that maybe his presence is just one piece in the puzzle's whole." Plus, it helped that the last time Haseo had thought him to be behind something, he had turned out desperately wrong.

He felt like he was intruding on something private as he looked between the two of them, the flush on Endrance's face. He ducked his head in greeting. "Hey," he murmured, looking around Haseo's room and taking in the rather messy state of it. What had gone on here?

Tsukasa frowned when Endrance mentioned the entrance room. "Like that flickery thing?" he asked curiously. "I thought I saw something for a moment but it was gone so quickly. I thought I'd imagined it." It had been for less than a second and it was more likely to be his imagination, right?

Hisfrown only deepened when Haseo spoke. "You think this is all some kind of simulation?" he asked. The thought was unpleasant.

It was only then, once he saw that strange look on Tsukasa's face, that Endrance combined that with how the room had to have looked, and had to turn away from both of them for just a moment to regain composure once again. He almost wanted to say that it wasn't actually what it looked like, but that would only make things more awkward. In the end, he said nothing at all, instead settling into the chair at the desk and looking down for a moment.

"Yes...like the flickery thing. I've seen it twice tonight - the first time, I was sure it was my imagination, but the second, I was just as sure that it wasn't. I don't know what to think anymore. If it's 'Kite', then, that's one thing, but if not..."

Endrance swept his bangs from his eyes, thinking once again. "I don't like disagreeing with you, Haseo, but I truly don't think this is a simulation. I know that the past two days have certainly been eventful, to say the least, but...the two days and one night before that, the days when it was just me here...were less so. I won't say that they were completely quiet, but the overall level of trickery has increased. I'm not sure what to make of it."

"Then what, Endrance?" Within moments, the frustration had built up again, and it showed clearly in Haseo's voice and resulting hand gesture. "Didn't you hear that-- strange voice on the intercom? They admit they're watching us... do you actually think this is the real world as we know it?!"

He looked away, focusing deliberately on the walls as he thought, as if they would change again with merely his will directed at them. However, apparently in the same way a watched pot wouldn't boil, it seemed glared-upon walls didn't glitch, and after a moment the dark room faded from his vision as his attention was forced inward entirely.

What am I even doing? Whether this is a game or a simulation or none of those things... can I really afford to be acting this way? It wasn't like this was the first time something or someone had tried to knock him down, after all... just the first time they'd done it so thoroughly. "No, I guess it doesn't even matter," he said, slow and suddenly calm. He took a breath, but what influenced the turnaround remained unspoken. "We can only observe and decide for certain when the answer comes in front of us."

"Unless you two think all this shit has something to do with me," he added, in that almost-amused tone that tended to indicate something wasn't all that amusing at all.

Tsukasa rolled his eyes, not quite believing that they were having to argue over whether they were in the world as they knew it. "I think that's pretty obvious considering we spent last night in the middle of a zombie apocalypse," he said sourly. "Endrance wasn't saying that he thought that at all," he continued firmly. "It could be a simulation, it could be something weirder. It doesn't matter. What's important is that it's real enough for us to get hurt in which means it's possibly real enough for us to die in which I'd like to avoid." He'd come too close to it during the time he'd been in a coma and he had too much to go back for to let this place kill him.

He sighed softly, closing his eyes for a moment before giving Haseo a confused look. "Why would we think it was anything to do with you?" he asked. "Might as well be something to do with me or with anyone else who arrived on the same day." Boys were confusing. And occasionally annoying. This was definitely one of those times.

Endrance just sighed, pulling his long legs into the chair with him and wrapping his arms around them. It hurt, but he ignored that pain. Besides that...the accusation hurt more than anything physical would have. "I didn't mean it like that, no. Of course this isn't our world! But..."

He sighed, and uncurled one arm just enough to gesture to the bandages on the others' bodies. "You can't get hurt in a simulation, no matter how realistic it is...and there's more to it than that. It seems to, at least, know our weak points. I..."

Another sigh, and Endrance looked down, staring at the floor. "Seven years ago...we were against an enemy with every chance to learn every single one of our weak points. It had access to the entire network, and it didn't care what damage it did, as long as it wasn't wiped from existence. And yet...not even something with that strong a motivation exploited every single weak point, like this place seems determined to."

That last statement...it was enough to make Endrance want to cry, but he didn't. "Haseo. Tsukasa. None of this is your fault. If anything, it's mine. I was the first one brought here, and I...I couldn't keep them from taking you. I couldn't even protect anyone that was here before, and..." The words trailed off, and he had to stifle a choked sob.

"Endrance, don't even--" Haseo sighed through his nose, feeling slightly stung himself. "Video games aren't supposed to send people into comas or connect your will and emotions to... 'Epitaphs,' either," he muttered. Work with me here, Endrance, you have an Avatar too and you've already admitted your sensitivity to it....

"That's not what I think," he answered Tsukasa, "It's just that if you heard what some people have to say, I'm to blame for everything." He wasn't being self-deprecating, just honest, even if by this point he half-expected someone to come along and crown him the Emperor of Misunderstandings. "Besides, this isn't the first time people have tried to knock me down, and I know it's not for you either, Endrance. You just said it yourself." Although the flashlights only partly-banished the room's darkness, he looked up at Tsukasa too. He didn't know the guy's full story, but he had a feeling his words probably applied there as well.

"You can't go saying 'it's my fault because I couldn't do this or that,'" he continued quietly, "Unless there was some choice thrown out and you failed it, I really doubt that... and in any case it's already passed. All we can do is focus on what can be done now."

Haseo picked up one of the sweatshirts off his bed, working it in his hands so it would be easier to thread over his injured arm. "Alkaid and Atoli were here before any of us showed up, as far as I know... do you think we should go tell Alkaid she's a failure because she didn't manage to stop it herself somehow?" A faint smile crossed Haseo's face at that, though he had to kick himself a bit for neglecting to mention her information on how he'd been there before Endrance as well. Maybe he'd bring it up later at a less sensitive time... once he'd talked to the girl again, probably.

Edited 2009-09-04 06:07 (UTC)

Tsukasa winced when Endrance said that you couldn't be hurt in a simulation. he licked his lips nervously wondering whether to tell them before deciding that he might as well. it probably didn't apply here but they deserved to know. "That's not entirely true," he said quietly, glancing up at the other two. "Even in The World, it's possible." He let out a soft huff of breath. "When I was stuck in this body before, I could feel everything there as though it were the real world. Heat and cold, the wind... pain. And it affected my body in the real world when I got hurt." They'd said that his hart had stopped at one point, probably when he'd been data drained but it had become so difficult to tell the passage of time.

He shifted a little awkwardly as Haseo spoke, giving him a surprised look for his words. It resonated with him a little. He remembered being hunted by the knights, being blamed for chaos being brought to The World.

"It's no-one's fault except the person who brought us here," he added quietly but with intensity. "We can't blame ourselves or each other. That's probably what they want."

"I..." There was no way Endrance could have possibly known what Tsukasa was going to say, but the words still hurt, and he tensed a bit more at the thought. It was truly frightening to think of everything that could happen in The World affecting someone in real life in the way Tsukasa had described. But...was it so different from AIDA? No. In the end, it wasn't that different; he remembered being able to feel the cool air in Indieglut Lugh, and of course, Mia's presence, there and steady and comforting. False comfort, but comfort all the same, or at least he had thought that was the case. He choked down another sob, this one harder to stifle than the last, then let the full impact of what Haseo and Tsukasa were both saying hit him. In the end...did it matter what this was? No. It didn't. What mattered was making sure everyone survived and got back home - to the real world, whatever that might be. Endrance didn't say anything, but looked up at both of them and nodded. The words wouldn't come out, but the look on his face said enough.

Haseo couldn't deny he felt relieved when it seemed his impromptu speech had hit its mark at least a little. It seemed odd to take comfort in that odd sort of normalcy in such a dark place, but like he had just said, they could only work with what they had, right? ... Even if they got hurt or whatever else. He sighed and pulled the sweatshirt over the bandaged limb, over his head and other arm, then--

The off-and-on static issuing from the intercom changed, and immediately Haseo's hand was on his short sword, his body stiffening in surprise as he turned his head to the intercom system and then in every direction, as if the input of this "password" would be visible somewhere in that small room.

"What the hell?" he said, "Is that... binary?" There was a brief urge to try and write down the code, but it was already too late and the message was too garbled underneath the... singing. As the broadcast continued, he handed a mental point to the Institute's play in creepiness and applied himself to putting on the boots he'd found with renewed vigor. They were a weird style, but he couldn't argue with something like that- they were better than the 'standard issue' for patient-prisoners, and he'd take every advantage he could get.

"Listen." As the intercom began to die down, Haseo spoke over it, standing once more and regathering his possessions to hide his uneasiness. "I told Leon earlier on the-- bulletin board that we'd come by. M88." He cleared his throat and shifted, for a long moment staring at Endrance before turning to Tsukasa with his eyebrows slightly raised. "I assumed you guys were coming with me, so."

NIGHTSHIFT 43: M1 - M10 CORRIDOR

[currently pacing between M4 and M9]

[coming out of M4 and awkwardly passing along]

[outside The Room of Death]

Re: [outside The Room of Death]

[outside M4 the Awesome]

[outside the Terror of M4]

[M4 is not a bore! 8D]

[we all adore room M4? 8D;; ]

[Yea, go for M4, to the core! \o/]

[I can't think of a rhyme for M4, so I'm feeling a bit sore? orz]

[ M4- perhaps you should try the rhyming store? :|a ]

Re: [ M4- perhaps you should try the rhyming store? :|a ]

[M4 - but going to the rhyme store is such a chore.]

[ M4 - What! Say that again and you'll be out the door! >:( ]

Re: [ M4 - What! Say that again and you'll be out the door! >:( ]

[ M4 - I won't do it anymore. T_T ]

[ M4 - Good! Else you hear me roar! ]

Re: [ M4 - Good! Else you hear me roar! ]

[ M4 - O Haseo, why don't you make En cry moar? ]

[ M4 - Continue with that and he'll get ignored... >> ]

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NIGHTSHIFT 43: M1 - M10 CORRIDOR

[currently pacing between M4 and M9]

[coming out of M4 and awkwardly passing along]

[outside The Room of Death]

Re: [outside The Room of Death]

[outside M4 the Awesome]

[outside the Terror of M4]

[M4 is not a bore! 8D]

[we all adore room M4? 8D;; ]

[Yea, go for M4, to the core! *\o/*]

[I can't think of a rhyme for M4, so I'm feeling a bit sore? orz]

[ M4- perhaps you should try the rhyming store? :|a ]

Re: [ M4- perhaps you should try the rhyming store? :|a ]

[M4 - but going to the rhyme store is such a chore.]

[ M4 - What! Say that again and you'll be out the door! >:( ]

Re: [ M4 - What! Say that again and you'll be out the door! >:( ]

[ M4 - I won't do it anymore. T_T ]

[ M4 - Good! Else you hear me roar! ]

Re: [ M4 - Good! Else you hear me roar! ]

[ M4 - O Haseo, why don't you make En cry moar? ]

[ M4 - Continue with that and he'll get ignored... >> ]

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[Yea, go for M4, to the core! \o/]