damned_institute | DAY 43: CAFETERIA, MORNING

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DAY 43: CAFETERIA, MORNING

Where was Blitzwing?

Lugnut ignored the nurse's fussing over his foot, even as it howled objections to his ill treatment of it the night before, pounding through the town in search of his wingmate, reportedly helpless and injured by an attack the night before-- and not finding him, not seeing even a glimpse of his crazy triple-changing ally.

Snarling at the nurse, but restraining himself from shows of violence-- Blitzwing would mock him if he showed up drugged already, and he would be useless to Megatron like that--he made his way impatiently to the cafeteria, stopping for just long enough to post an urgent notice on the board.

Where was he?

Looming in the middle of the cafeteria, he took the tray the nurse handed him (filled with disgusting human fuel, didn't she know he didn't have time to eat, not when his wingmate was missing?) and ignored it, watching for Blitzwing, where was he?

He refused to think about what might have happened to a wheelchair-bound, drugged, incapacitated warrior, with the swarms of monsters flooding around him, clawing and biting...

[for Scourge]

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"Good morning Badou. No, I'm fiiiAAAH!"

Honestly, why he had been expecting Badou to greet him in a normal fashion, especially after a near-apocalypse, even he didn't know. Perhaps this was what other people called 'being in denial'.

Well, 'being in denial' had ended him on Badou's shoulder, clinging to the back of Badou's shirt like a kitten trying to avoid falling off a mountain-like hand. It was probably good that Haku wasn't there, otherwise Artemis might have been forcibly contracted into fluffing pillows and working lighters while Badou's crushed hands had a chance to recuperate.

"Is there any chance that you'll put me down before someone points and laughs?" he asked, giving his nurse a flat, annoyed look while she and some of her coworkers giggled about how adorable he looked.

"And you might be able to avoid hefting 'baby whales' if you'd stop picking me up whenever we happen to see one another."

Making sure Artemis was secure in his place, Badou passed by the food counter to pick up a tray of the usual breakfast crap. He wasn't really paying attention to what ended up on it aside from a salad and a precariously balanced glass of juice. He ended up carrying all of it in his free hand.

His own nurse didn't like him a great deal, but it looked like Arty's were willing to put up with this for a little while. Perfect. "You tell me boy genius."

Badou was taking his time picking out a table for them. "I've picked you up...twice. Something like that. It's not every time we see eachother so stop whining or I might get all demoralized drop you."

"Pleasedon'tdropme," Artemis pleaded, clenching the back of Badou's shirt even tighter. He didn't actually think that Badou would drop him on purpose, because it would most likely lead to injury and--most importantly--nurses never letting Badou pick Artemis up again. He'd be branded a child-dropper for life.

"How are you able to carry all of that one-handed anyway?" Artemis asked. He was making conversation whilst perched on Badou's shoulder. He must have hit some all-time high in terms of strange situations not even phasing him.

Artemis really needed to learn how to trust in Badou's awesome strength. "It's called a tray. You put all of the food on it. And I waited tables for a week back home."

He might have spoken too soon. His shoulder was really protesting now, to the point that he was sure he'd ripped some stitches open. He picked the closest table in the end and set the tray down first before helping Artemis down beside it with both arms wrapped around him so he wouldn't bruise his poor tender tailbone. He didn't let go right away. "You ok?"

Artemis had prepared himself to be let down, but when it didn't come immediately, he was a little surprised. Though he quickly recognized what was going on and nodded into Badou's shoulder.

"Physically, I'm fine. Mentally..." he laughed weakly. "Mentally I don't think I've come to terms with the undead walking down the streets last night."

Or the fact that he'd realized that the only thing that could save Haku from bleeding out and dying was the thing he was trying to tear down and escape from. That had been a bit damaging to his pride, to say the least.

"You're unharmed though, right?" Artemis asked. "Otherwise you wouldn't be putting me over your shoulder."

Badou let him go and pushed his fingers through his own hair. Last night had been nice in terms of a distraction - and man, he knew his life was fucked up when hoards of the undead were a nice distraction - but he still had to deal with yesterday evening sooner or later. And today was visitor shifts again, but maybe Haine had gotten his exercise hanging out with the other zombies last night and he wouldn't come for a return visit. He'd always been a lazy motherfucker.

Badou really wanted to go back to bed when this shift was over. He didn't want to deal with anything today.

"Actually your whale blubber might have dislocated my shoulder." He replied distractedly. "We made a zombie's head explode. You should have been there; it was badass."

He straddled a chair and motioned for Artemis to do the same. "Sit. Food. Then you can tell me how Haku's doing."

"I decapitated one," Artemis said shyly, sitting down in front of the food Badou had apparently picked up for Artemis and not himself. "But the neck joints were probably heavily decomposed. I only kicked it there when it bit Haku and the body just sort of... fell over."

The boy looked a little sick remembering that. Not that he was going to have a bleeding-heart moment and mourn the loss of a member of the undead legion--Haku was far more important than someone he didn't even know. He started in on the salad.

"But, it exploded hm?" Artemis said, not so subtly moving the subject away from Haku and his many bites. "How did that happen? ...And aren't you going to have something?" Artemis asked, indicating the space in front of Badou with his fork.

"Good job." Badou replied, mildly surprised that Artemis had managed it. He couldn't dodge a speeding turtle so it was kind of an accomplishment there. "Next time don't justify it. It was touching your man so you kicked its ass."

Badou could be dense about some things, but it was damn well impossible not to notice that Artemis was changing the topic. He raised an eyebrow, but he didn't say anything about it.

"We were in the bar. Pressurized beer directly into the brain." He wasn't overly bothered by it aside from the fact that it stank like Haine's face and looked a bit like the leftover pasta in his fridge. And speaking of food, it wasn't helping his appetite any. He hadn't even thought of eating this morning. "Huh? I'll eat later. Two brunch shifts."

"Ah, that's clever. I hadn't thought of that." If Artemis kicking something could break it, then high-pressure water would certainly do the trick. Next time: fire hose. Well, while they were on the subject, next time Artemis would actually be armed when he went on this little field trip. The near-death experience hadn't been amusing at all, but the spoils were too good to pass up. He had matches, after all.

"Will you really eat later, or are you just saying that to prevent me from making you go get something right now?" Artemis asked, smiling pleasantly at Badou. If by 'pleasantly', he meant 'if you don't eat something, I'm going to tell your nurse you're anorexic. ♥'

"Neither did I. Probably saved our asses. The other zombies were pretty easy to take down but this guy needed to be a special snowflake." He'd already bitched at length about how special a snowflake it was, so he was pretty content to leave it at that for once. Anyway, something else had occurred to him. "I heard he wasn't the only one either. You didn't run into anything else last night, did you?"

He was pretty sure Artemis had been spared that, or he wouldn't even be this stable in the morning. Didn't hurt to ask anyway. As for Artemis threat, Badou reached out lazily and tugged on his cheek. "Aww, aren't you menacing this morning."

Artemis shook his head, thinking back. "No, just swarms upon swarms of revenants. I think I might have seen an animal akin to those in the building, but other than the biting-types, nothing." He frowned, "What do you mean by special snowflake?" Perhaps he meant that their opponent hadn't gone down with a simple kick? That using explosive force on his head was the only way to down him?

"Ow," Artemis said through his stretched cheek. He decided that he was happy his parents' siblings didn't visit them at all--this sort of behavior would have been commonplace, otherwise. Oh wait--it already was.

"Talk like that could damage my ego," Artemis replied, giving Badou a flat look. "Unhand my face, villain."

"I forgot what a delicate flower your ego was." Badou replied, but since he was no longer being threatened with food, he let Artemis' face go without much further abuse.

"The barkeep was hard to take down. He was strong, and pretty fast for a zombie. Not as stupid as the rest either. Bigger. And he roared like he thought he was the fucking lion king. Three of us were fighting him." It might not be pertinent information anymore, but if they ended up in a situation like that again he'd rather Artemis - and presumably Haku - get their asses into gear while they could still outrun the damn thing.

But that wasn't what he really needed to bring up. He debated with himself briefly, but those things could be back as soon as tonight and it was better that Artemis hear it from him before he actually ran into anything. "And there's a rumor going around about another type; some of the patients that died here were out there."

Artemis was quiet for a moment, wondering if Renji had been among that group. Or even Hitsugaya, even though he was alive now--or his 'alternate' self was or... honestly it was too upsetting to think about.

"Oh..." he said, finding himself unable to say anything else. "That... has implications that I can't exactly think about right now, but if you give me a few minutes, I'll think of something..."

He poked at his salad again, trying not to think about people who had vanished being trapped in their own bodies as undead--unable to die or leave their hell. Which meant, of course...

"We can't die here," Artemis said, connecting the dots. "We can't die, or we'll end up like that."

There went his last resort, he supposed.

"Yup, so you should eat your salad unless you want me to feed it to you." Badou replied, apparently non-plussed. "Think of it as more incentive to not die."

Though he continued in much the same tone, he reached over and rested a hand on Artemis' head. "You know, just in case you didn't have enough to deal with."

Artemis laughed weakly, not minding the comforting hand on his head this time. "No, of course not. Currently I just have a half-dead boyfriend, Schuldig who's lost Crawford again, you who won't eat, and an afterlife as a mindless zombie on my mind. Fortunately I only tend to worry about the things that happen to me mere hours previous--like a goldfish."

He half-heartedly stabbed his salad. "I'm not sure if this is supposed to rally my spirit to fight harder, or utterly destroy it. But I think I have some time before I completely self-destruct in a cloud of logic."

That was news to him. Not the half-dead boyfriend part, but Schuldig losing his partner (?) again. Badou couldn't say he felt terribly remorseful since Yohji was still around and he didn't walk around like he had a skyscraper up his ass, but he was the last person to be talking about other people's choices in friends.

Also, apparently, he failed at kids. That wasn't news at least. "I don't know where you got the impression that I was a cheerleader. I mean, I look cute in the skirt but that's beside the point. I'm just telling you what's going on because it might keep you alive a little longer to know and it's better than finding out the hard way." Sadly enough, this was the easy way. "That's all there is Arty. Life sucks, and then it sucks more, but you live anyway if you're lucky."

"I'll be fine." He added, almost as an afterthought. "I'll eat later. I'm not starving myself like a moron. Just not hungry right now, I promise."

Artemis stared at his plate intently as Badou spoke. While the skirt comment was most likely meant to soften the 'I'm not going to console you' blow. As much as he tried to avoid using the psychologist gloves with people he was friends with, Artemis was angry that the outcome wasn't the one he had wanted.

He couldn't get angry with Badou, though. He couldn't take out his despair and frustration on Badou, because that wasn't what he wanted. Realism was taking over his life, and he wanted someone to tell him he could defy this. That he would live anyway.

"No, I don't live if I'm lucky--I live because I work for it. That is the difference between you and me. You're fatalistic to a fault, in this building at least. But where I came from, if I had to jump out of a building to save myself and three others, I would. When my manservant and only friend took a bullet for me, I didn't sit there and say he wasn't 'lucky', I saved his life. So, forgive me if I don't agree that 'that's all there is, Arty'."

He paused for a moment and then stabbed his fork into his waffles. It stuck upright. Frustration taken out on his waffles, he was able to take a calming deep breath.

If Artemis had been looking for someone to tell him everything was alright, that person wasn't going to be Badou. It had never been him. He took Arty's mind off the big bad world for a while and let him sob into his shirt and treated him like family - but he never said things would be alright somehow. In Badou's experience, things were never alright. You laughed, you killed shit, and you kept going. Artemis was right. That was one of the biggest differences between them. When threatened Artemis acted, forced his own way like the stubborn brat he was. Badou reacted. Always. He spent his whole life backed against the edge of something deep and dark and ugly.

He opened his mouth to say something, but instead he laughed, the sound as harsh as gunfire and about as cheerful. "You're forgiven. Feeling better now that the waffles know their place?"

"Yes," Artemis said, a little annoyed that Badou hadn't said anything in reply to his small tirade. He went to all the trouble of pointing out a serious character flaw and all Badou could talk about was Artemis' waffles and the fork that was now slouching in them.

"And no. They didn't do anything. They're just waffles." He pushed his tray back and folded his arms on the table. He looked at the opposite wall, as though trying to read something written on it in small print.

"Do you truthfully believe that you are going to get out of here?" he asked.

Badou shrugged as if this didn't matter in the slightest, and after a moment he folded his arms against the back of the chair and rested his chin on them. "The pancakes are good. I might get out of here, I might die tonight. It doesn't matter what I believe if I get my head bitten off."

He stopped. That was pretty much all he had to say on the subject. Or he would have stopped anyway, but Arty wasn't the only one with a few million raw nerves. He didn't even notice his hand reaching down to paw at his pocket for an absent cigarette.

"Where I come from, when you jump off a building you hit the pavement like bird shit. When your friend gets shot, you rip the bullet out and stitch it up and you get lucky because the hospitals won't take you. Unless you're Haine. Then you just defy every law of the universe and good manners and fall into my apartment at three in the fucking morning and sit around and bitch while I use my good tweezers to pull bullets out of your pasty ungrateful unlikable ass. And then you end up here telling me this shit is real." Badou rarely got angry, but he was practically snarling by this point. "Un-fucking-forgivable. You think I'm going to let that go? We're partners. I have shit to finish back home."

He flashed Artemis a grin. "I might die, I might not. Is that supposed to mean something?"

On the one hand, Artemis had never seen Badou this angry. Outwardly, at least. It inspired a strange, dawning kind of fear--the kind that someone had when they slowly (or quickly) came to realize that an oncoming car was not going to slow down or stop. For this reason, he didn't say anything for a long time after Badou stopped ranting.

On the other, Artemis felt relieved that Badou actually felt something. It was hard to work towards a goal with apathetic compatriots. Certainly Butler was always telling Artemis that whatever he was planning wasn't going to work or was too crazy for even Artemis to consider relatively sane, but any energy was energy. If Badou, someone Artemis depended on to keep him focused and upright, began talking as though it were all over, he wouldn't have been able to take that.

"It would mean something to me," Artemis said, looking back at Badou.

He stared at Artemis a moment, then shook his head and rested it on his arms again, expression unreadable. After a moment, he snorted softly. "You're such a girl."

He sat up enough to drag Artemis' plate of much-abused waffles over and remove the fork so he could cut off a small section. He held it out to Artemis. "Say 'ah' or I start making airplane noises and tell the nurses you're trying to look like a supermodel."

"I'm a what?" Artemis asked, ready to be indignant. He watched Badou cut up his food for him, frowning a little.

There was no negotiating himself out of this situation. Badou was a dangerous man, prone to fits of picking up children without their consent, and he was armed and dangerous with a fork and threatening to poke even more fun at Artemis' age. He couldn't defend himself against that. So he did the only thing he could: he pouted.

"Well, I wouldn't want you to look stupid," Artemis replied, his tone obviously implying the exact opposite. He opened his mouth and took the waffle bit, though.

"Just remember how much you like me." Badou replied. The only thing his tone implied was that he was a total and utter dick, and Artemis was doing very little to discourage this behaviour.

He cut off another waffle bit, ready and waiting for when the boy finished chewing the first. "Ahh. Allelujah was going to make a scrapbook out of the things he likes about me. Maybe you should help him out. You might be more artistically inclined than a guy who kills people with giant robots."

Artemis paused mid-chew when Badou mentioned Allelujah's apparent occupation. He considered this for a moment, then nodded and continued to chew. "Possibly. I suppose if all he does is kill people with giant robots, then yes he may be stunted in his right-brain.

"Or he could be a very creative robot-operator. Kill people in creative ways. But I suppose I could lend a hand. I did forge a few paintings in my day," he finished, opening his mouth for more waffle.

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