damned_institute | Day 42, Noon: The Twin Pine Restaurant

Yuffie took the long way around, practically making it a tour of the entire town. She collared--not literally, since the nurses would've thrown fits--a few random citizens along the way, asked as many inconspicuous sounding questions as possible, and then moved on. Wash, rinse, repeat. Sneaking a few covert glimpses into stores and windows confirmed what she'd been talking about with Sam earlier; no dates, no explicitly mentioned locations outside of the town itself… how weird was that? Even the most insular of towns back on Gaia would've coughed up some kind of connection with the outside world.

It was almost like a living ghost town.

Well, maybe she was just thinking too hard. Maybe she was throwing shuriken too hard at the wrong target. Back home, she had a concrete frame of reference. Here, she couldn't take anything for granted; she had no local or international knowledge whatsoever. All she could try to do was get a profile of the immediate area and build it up and out from there. Theories were already budding, popping up like weeds hit by Quadra-Haste, but without facts to back them up, theories were like sand in a desert.

Not that she didn't want to share those theories, sand or not. She did. A lot.

Once she'd developed a viable mental map of the place (as viable as she was gonna get given the time constraints), Yuffie swung back around and jogged back to North Street. From there, she took the alley; a quick right turn; slow to a trot, and there. Her cheeks were tinged pink from the cold winter air, and they stung as she poked her head in through the door.

Okay, so maybe she was a little early after all. That was cool. Very cool. She had some time to set things up, to pretend that she wasn't hideously under prepared for this lunch date. Stepping into the warmth, Yuffie surreptitiously cased the place out as she headed to a table. Homey, in a way that almost reminded her of some of the up-and-coming rural towns. Automatically seeking out one of the more strategic seats--one with a good view of the rest of the restaurant, and one that didn't leave her totally vulnerable to mutant chairs or murderous sandwiches--she made herself comfortable, whipped out a few crumpled pieces of paper and a pen, and began to jot down her findings.

[Closed to Edgeworth.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"Glad you asked, my boy!" Porky said heartily, "My name is...Porky! Porky Minch!"

Bel watches him for a moment. Stares. And then, breaks out into laughter- soft, hissed between his teeth, cruel, and horribly amused.

"W-What's so funny?" Porky said confused.

Oh, SHIT.

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck FUCK!" Porky shouted, "Oh, son of a BITCH! You mean I told you all of that for NOTHING?! No, it can't be! S-Stop joking around! Dammit, I know that you're just kidding!"

No no no! This can't be happening! Porky did not just tell this brat his life story for nothing!

Bel opens his mouth to laugh harder, a hand clenched over his stomach at the loud cursing of the other. After a few split seconds, he manages control, still giggling under his breath. This was hilarious. Too good to be true.

"Too bad." He murmurs out, on another fleeting chuckle. Belphegor leans in, his smile nice and wide and cruel. "Pleased to meet you," He murmurs, his voice practically dripping with sarcasm. "I'm prince Belphegor."

"SON...OF...A...BIIIITCH!!" Porky shouted, pounding the table with each word, "You CANNOT be SERIOUS!!"

After he had finished his outburst, he started slamming his forehead on the table. After a few whacks on the head, Porky simply laid his head on the table. He laid there for a few moments, completely immobile, and then raised his right hand and put it in front of Belphegor.

"Pleased to meet you," Porky mumbled weakly.

Bel simply watched, not bothering to hide his amusement, nor particularly caring if this guy happened to be attracting the attention of the people around them. He sipped his milk, took a few bites of his pasta, and just looked as if this sort of thing happened often.

At the extended hand... well, Belphegor watched that as well, his body language pretty much admitting that he wasn't even considering shaking his hand, king or no.

"Ten thousand years, hm?" Bel asked with a tilt of his head and another large, condescending grin. "All that time, and never learning to hold your tongue."

After waiting for Belphegor to shake his hand for a few moments, which obviously wasn't going to happen, Porky raised his head back up and put his hand back at his side. Porky sighed for what seemed like a full minute before finally speaking.

"Well, what can I say?" Porky said, managing to smile weakly, "Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age. And besides, it's not like I'm always this...verbose. Normally I'm a lot more secretive about things."

Suddenly, Porky lit up.

"Hey!" Porky said, grinning, "Wait a minute, if I thought that you were just like me, then that means..."

"I'm sure you are." He mutters sarcastically, the dark smirk still tainting his features and making him look downright nasty. Another pause, as Porky seemed to get an idea, and Belphegor sighed inwardly before tilting his head in an expression of mock curiosity. "Mm, by all means, continue."

"Well, I thought that you were me, right?" Porky began, a small grin, creeping onto his face, "And while the main reason I thought you were me was the way you looked, the way you acted was another important part of it. Namely, that you were rude, vain, and somewhat childish. I now know, however, that, unlike me, you lack tact, which is arguably my only social grace. All of these factors combined lead to one obvious conclusion."

Porky suddenly pointed right at Belphegor.

"No one here likes you!" Porky stated triumphantly, "And around here, if you don't have at least one person that trusts you, you may as well be dead. Do you see what I'm driving at here? Ah, thank you."

After he had finished talking to Belphegor, the waitress returned with Porky's meal, visibly shaken by his behavior earlier. Without waiting for her to leave, Porky took his fork and knife and began shoveling the pork chops into his mouth.

Belphegor had to stop again after that, eyes narrowing dangerously behind his hair. He reached down for his fork, as if ready to take another bite of his pasta, before hesitating and glancing down at the silver utensil, his eyes traveling back up to Porky himself.

His wrist flicked and the fork embedded itself into the soft padding of the booth next to Porky, and Bel scoffed. "I'm the prince. Everyone likes me, idiot."

"Oh, shit!" Porky yelped as he ducked as soon as Belphegor threw his fork, "What the fuck was that for?!"

When Porky realized that Belphegor wasn't aiming for him, he straightened up and pointed at Belphegor again.

"See? See?!" Porky said excitedly, "If you act like that here, you're as good as dead! Even the bad guys that got sent here won't hang out with you if you're..."

Porky briefly considered saying "an arrogant prick," but then settled on a more tactful answer. After all, Porky couldn't go around saying he had tact if he never used it.

"If you're so rash!" Porky finally said, "You need to learn to be humble! I know that it seems impossible now, but trust me, it's a necessity here."

"But fine," Porky said with a devious grin on his face, "If you're so popular, then I'm sure you have plans for tonight, right? I mean, everyone likes you, right?"

Belphegor simply raised an eyebrow at the over energetic man gesturing wildly in front of him. Vaguely, he wondered if Porky was some sort of clown before he'd been brought here- this certainly was almost entertaining. At the question, he tilted his head with an unwavering smile.

True enough, he hadn't many plans. He hardly knew anyone here (save for his roommate and his disgusting little friend), and making friends wasn't exactly the first thing to do on Belphegor's list. Nevertheless, it wasn't like he was just going to admit that to the fool, so he simply shrugged and gave a little hum.

"I refuse to spend time with paupers," he murmurs, taking a sip of his milk, "now hand me my fork back."

"Oh, a tough guy, eh?" Porky said snidely, "Well, we'll see how tough you are after your first night alone at the institute. I wonder...How long do you think you'd last? Besides, sometimes even princes have to spend time with paupers if they want to survive. I used to be a king, remember? I don't like hanging around these idiots, but I've accepted the fact that I have to if I want to live."

"Besides..." Porky said, this time a little more slyly, "It's not like you wouldn't get anything out of the deal if you decided to hang out with me. I may not be much in the fighting department, but when it comes to information, I'm top notch. I know where you could maybe get...a knife or two. Would that interest you?"

Porky took the fork out of the seat next to him and held it out in front of Belphegor.

"So what do you say, Prince Belphegor?" Porky said.

Day 42, Noon: The Twin Pine Restaurant

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject