Day 39: Sun Room [Fourth Shift]

[winged_moon]

Yue was all too pleased to leave the cafeteria by the time lunch was over, even if he still wasn't satisfied that Fai was properly taking care of himself. It was clear that Touya hadn't accepted the answers he'd been given and intended to find out just what the guardian wasn't telling him, and being watched so closely was beginning to get uncomfortable.

It was clear that the truth would have to come out at some point, especially if they were going to be spending any amount of time together. Avoiding him was entirely out of the question, but at the same time Yue stubbornly refused to consider the idea of just outright telling him about what had happened in the last week. It was a dilemma indeed, and only served to make him even more irritable than ever.

How could he admit any of it? That he was weak and crippled, betrayed and altered by his creator? That he'd almost broken the promise he'd given in exchange for Touya's power? The latter he couldn't help but be reminded of every time he saw this Touya, who had only just gone through it, and would remember it even more clearly.

Fortunately Yukito was staying silent for the moment, although he could feel his other self's disappointment at being unable to speak to Touya so far, and it didn't make him feel any better.

In the midst of all this Yue was rather dismayed to realize that the nurse wanted to lead him to the music room, of all places: that was the room where he'd met the Sakura-who-wasn't-his-Sakura the week before, and needed neither the reminder nor the inevitable noise in that room. He abruptly halted in his tracks and refused to continue on. The nurse seemed initially disappointed, but finally agreed to let him stay in the Sun Room instead; the guardian found a corner in which to stand, arms folded across his chest and lost in his own brooding thoughts.

[for Sokka]

Comments

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

"That's what he said," she explained, deciding against telling him that at the time she'd come from, Itachi had already been killed and there had been no sign of Sasuke either. Rumors were circulating about how he'd formed his own team and Sakura couldn't help but feel a twinge of bitterness thinking they'd been replaced.

"But there has to be a way to show him that we all want him to come home." Himura had said they would need patience and to show Sasuke that they were still friends, still useful to him. "I think we should try to treat him the same as before, as much as we can. Sasuke-kun won't change overnight, but maybe gradually he will."

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"You mean...like before he left?" Naruto said. It would actually be a little hard for him to manage that, considering the hurt of Sasuke leaving them both behind was ever present, a weight on his shoulders and in his heart that he could never quite forget. But if Sakura thought it was worth a shot, he'd try it, as well.

"We could try that."

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

"Well... not exactly the same, but... we won't get very far if we keep ignoring each other, right? I guess, I'm just not sure what else to do. I helped heal his arm the other night, so he said he owes me a favor, but I don't know how much good it will do." Really she wanted to be useful to him and show him that she'd be there in good times and bad, but hadn't they done that already? After all they'd been through and they still wanted to be his friend... just how long could he ignore that?

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"But he's the one that's ignoring us...no matter what I say he just shrugs it off," Naruto said, almost sulking. He agreed that ignoring each other wasn't a good idea, but he had done everything but ignore Sasuke from the beginning. He couldn't have done it, anyways.

"He probably meant a 'exchange information or give you a weapon' sort of favor," Naruto said, annoyed with him at the thought of it.

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

Even if what Naruto said was true, it didn't mean she was going to just give up. Sasuke had been reclusive and stand-offish since the beginning, it'd just gotten progressively worse. They couldn't force him to care, she knew that, but that didn't mean that they had to stop caring either.

"I'll have to give it some thought," she said after a few moments of silence. She knew as well as Naruto that Sasuke would be most likely to do something like that in exchange for what she'd done, but for now at least, she had a small bargaining chip.

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"Okay, I'll try to keep thinking of something, too," he said, his gaze falling around the room, observing the people briefly. He didn't like to think of the way Sasuke acted toward him. He had known Sasuke, in leaving Konoha, had attempted to sever their bonds, but he'd somehow believed that when they'd meet again, when he'd find him, he'd be able to bring him back. Failing to do so and ending up here was what he felt was his biggest failure. Not only had he not even been nearly strong enough, Sasuke was far more distant than he'd expected him to be. Infuriatingly so, and it made his chest ache a little.

It didn't help that Sasuke didn't act that way with strangers he barely knew.

In a way it made him wonder why he cared so much about Sasuke, why he couldn't stop thinking about him, about bringing him back home. He was still his best friend in his eyes, even if he no longer aspired to be Sasuke, to be as strong as him (because in Naruto's eyes Sasuke wasn't strong, and in acting so distant was in fact being a coward).

He wondered why Sakura loved him so much, too. He had always been nothing but an asshole to her, when he'd always stood by her side. He wasn't good with romantic stuff, but he couldn't understand why someone would pick someone as distant and cold as Sasuke over someone that simply wanted to spend some time with you on a date.

"Hey, Sakura-chan?"

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

She was glad Naruto agreed and hoped they'd be able to figure something out. Maybe it would be a good idea to speak with Kakashi or Himura. Himura at least might have some good advice. He'd lifted her spirits plenty the last couple of times they'd spoken, so maybe he'd have some ideas for what they could do.

Sakura found herself looking blankly down at her hands, and turned her head when Naruto spoke again. "Hmm?" she replied, waiting for his question.

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"Um," he hesitated suddenly, not sure if he'd get away with asking her that. She might get angry, and it was kind of a personal question. But he was curious, and for some reason wanted to know Sakura's reasons for liking Sasuke to his own. Even if he was very well aware it wasn't the same kind of like, Sakura was the only one he knew (apart from Kakashi-sensei) who cared about Sasuke as a teammate and a friend.

"Why do you like Sasuke?"

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

Of all the questions Naruto might have asked, she hadn't seen that one coming. He'd had opportunities in the past and it'd just... never really come up. It was true that her feelings had started out as a childhood crush, based solely on looks and his amazing skills, but after getting to know him, it'd become more than that. She'd given up her best friend, turning her into a bitter rival just to pursue Sasuke.

There had always been something dark and mysterious about him and it was hard not to be impressed by all the things he was capable of and how quickly he learned. As they'd completed more and more missions together, she'd seen other sides to him. He'd almost died when they fought Haku and while she'd never known the details, the fact that Naruto had been virtually unharmed, gave her an idea of how Sasuke had gotten hurt.

She'd grown a lot because of things he'd said to her, whether Sasuke realized it or not. It was because of him, she was able to understand and have compassion for Naruto too, instead of just thinking of him as an annoyance. And when he'd protected her from the sound ninjas during their Chuunin exams, she'd always hoped it was because they were friends, not just the people he worked with. Because he had cared. He had definitely cared.

There were so many small instances where she'd thought they were all growing together, she knew she couldn't name them all. To answer Naruto's question, she could've waved it off, laughed, gotten upset, but she chose to be up front about it, even if it was hard to answer.

"I guess... I don't think we can change who our hearts tell us to care about," she replied. And she believed it. Maybe the reason sounded vague and silly, but it was hard to explain any other way. That bond was still there, thin and torn though it might be. And just as strongly she knew that somewhere, deep in that cold, icy heart, Sasuke still cared about the friends he'd left behind.

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"I guess," Naruto said, knowing that she was right and that it was probably impossible to stop caring about someone instantly like that. It was one of the reasons he didn't believe Sasuke truly had severed their bonds. Sasuke wasn't inhuman, and he was sure to still feel something, somewhere.

Yet Sakura's answer frustrated him a little, maybe because it wasn't at all what he'd been waiting for or expecting. He was on edge already, and it still hurt a little to know Sakura still cared, seemingly the same way she had before he left. It had always hurt, but if he had to step aside then he would.

For now though, he hoped Sakura wouldn't be bothered by his questions.

"So you think you'll...always like him? Did you like him 'cause he was popular, before?"

[see-my-back.livejournal.com]

Naruto didn't seem all that satisfied by the answer she gave him, but it was kind of embarrassing to say any more than that! A love confession, that sort of thing was best left between the two people meant to hear it, wasn't it? She knew Naruto had a crush too, and it might be mean to say those sort of things in front of him.

"Geez Naruto, you shouldn't ask a girl things like this. Haa..." she scratched her head in a frustrated way, but considered the question as truthfully as she could.

"I used to like him because of that I guess," she admitted. "But things changed. I came to see just how incredible our team was. We all grew up a lot from where we started. And little by little, there were other things I came to admire and respect. You too Naruto."

Whether or not she would always like him? Well, the amount of care she had for her teammate hadn't diminished, even after so long. "The feelings I have now, I don't know if they're the same, but... more than anything, I just want him to be happy." It felt like she could wait forever just to see one genuine smile, even if it wasn't for her.

[whirlingwinds.livejournal.com]

"Sorry," he said, a little sheepish. He was simply curious, and he hadn't been sure if asking that was okay or not -- it wasn't exactly something he'd been taught.

He nodded as she spoke, thankful that she'd chosen to answer his question despite it. He gave her a surprised look when she mentioned him, but he knew by now not to hope that Sakura liked him that way, too.

He smiled a little nonetheless, especially when she mentioned wanting him happy. He couldn't disagree with that. Part of why he wanted Sasuke back in Konoha was because he had been happy there, when they were a team, because it was safe and Sasuke had smiled a little sometimes. Now he never did, never had any facial expression except for a blank one and annoyance.

"I want him to be happy, too," he said. Remembering those days as a team made him sad, because Sasuke had become almost an entirely different person. He'd been...despite being frustrating and always beating him at everything he'd been fun to be with, had, in his own little ways, shown he cared for both of them. Things weren't like that anymore, so Naruto could only wish they would return to it eventually.