damned_institute | DAY 36: LIBRARY

Keman retreated to libraries almost instinctively. He liked books. Books were simpler to deal with, and they didn't change. No matter what, the ending always stayed the same. Even if it was a bad ending, that ending was still a constant. Constants were good. They didn't surprise him, didn't show up out of nowhere and throw everything off kilter.

This had.

His mother. They'd taken Alara and done horrible things to her. Made her forget, fed her lies. He wouldn't wish it on anyone, not even Myre. And that was what would happen to him, too, if he wasn't careful. He'd lose himself completely. He was already slipping, already more halfblood than dragon. How long before halfblood turned to human, and Keman became Calvin?

At any rate, he needed to tell Shana everything that had happened. Alara was her mother, too. Keman left a note for his sister on the board, letting her know where he'd be, and then pulled the largest book he could find off the shelf: The Complete Works of William Shakespeare. It looked to be a massive collection of plays and poetry. Good. Opening it to a random page, he settled down and began to read.

[for Shana (and Valyn and Shadow?)]

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Ed huffed slightly as Hohenheim skim-read a few lines of the book, crossing his arms over his chest and glowering until his father put the book down. If he wanted to talk, the least he could do was actually talk instead of ignoring him.

He narrowed his eyes warily when Hohenheim asked about Hughes, not quite trusting him, even now. Hughes had been killed because of his involvement with Ed and Al, he didn't want to risk him again. "What do you want to know?" he asked sullenly. "He helped us a lot. Treated me and Al like we were his family." The word because you weren't there didn't even need to be said.

Tilting his head to the side at the reply, Hohenheim considered the question. What did he want to know? Edward was eyeing him in that way that created a new sense of awkwardness that had faded with the Edward of his time. "Yes, he mentioned how he thought of you boys as family," he said softly.

Of course, that was also right before the other man had expressed dislike towards him. He had lived too many years to be bothered by such things, and there was a reason for such animosity in the first place. He had stepped away from his duties as a father impromptly. Trisha had known his reasons, and he had promised to return.

"I suppose..." he drawled, trying to figure out what information would be needed. "Do you know an appropriate way to thank him? I don't know him all that well, but I would like to thank him for taking care of you boys in my absense."

Hughes had been like family to them, even if Ed didn't think he'd ever appreciated as much as he should until it was gone. He hadn't found out until so much later, and there hadn't been time to grieve or to go and see Gracia or Elysia and apologise for getting him involved.

"He gave me a twelfth birthday party when I first joined the military," he said, wanting Hohenheim to know about everything that he'd missed because of his own stupidity. "And his daughter was born on that day." He remembered it well. It had been such a happy day.

He gave his father a surprised look for that. "Thank him?" Why now? He was the one who'd left so why did he even care? "I dunno. Go back in time and stop Envy from killing him, perhaps," he hissed angrily.

Ah, the twelfth birthday apparently was as important as the sixteenth, though he had never figured out the significance. He was pretty certain that Trisha had tried to explain it to him, but he had found the concept of special years to be absurd. Every year was supposed to have something special about it or nothing at all. It was just another day of the year.

"Oh? You got to see a child being brought into the world?" Now, that was a special event. He had almost missed the first time, but he had been present for both Edward and Alphonse's births. They had been very special. "You were a cute baby when you were born. All squinty-eyed without a sniff of hair on you. Ah... those were the days..."

He nodded his head to the simple question. "Yes, thank him," he clarified before frowning at the mention of Envy again. He straightened his glasses on his nose. "You and I both know that turning back time is impossible and that things happen in history for a reason, even if we don't understand at the time." He considered that for a moment. "Besides, going back in time indicates regret over a situation or a feeling of powerlessness."

Ed nodded, feeling warm at the memory. It had been an amazing experience. Kind of gross and terrifying at points admittedly, but amazing all the same. "She's called Elysia. Hughes adores her." And would never willingly abandon her. Yes, he was bitter, and probably always would be to a certain extent.

He glowered at his father for that comment. No teenage boy liked being told how cute they'd been as a baby, and the fact that it was Hohenheim saying it just made it worse.

"I feel regret," he snapped, eyes flashing dangerously. "He died trying to find out about Envy and the Fuhrer. he died because he was trying to help me and Al! Because we got him involved!"

Yes, he remembered Maes Hughes mentioning a small child, though the other man had not been keen to divulge any particular details about the young one in question. Of course, Hughes did seem like the type of man to take family very seriously and tout about any blood-related children, especially if there was such a fierce protectiveness over his own children.

At the glower, he smiled pleasantly. He almost forgot that Edward was a teenager, but it really had been a nice moment. "Your mother adored you. She kept hugging you and saying you were going to be a sweet young boy." Trisha really did adore the children; he couldn't have left them in better care.

Hohenheim raised an eyebrow at the words and rubbed fingers along his chin as he regarded Edward seriously. "He died because he cared, is that it?" Such a child, sometimes. "If you regret what he did for you and Alphonse, you'll cheapen his sacrifice. You should be sad, but you should appreciate the act for what it was... a man who considered you family protecting you."

Forget leaving, this was the worst thing that Hohenheim had ever done. Ed groaned softly, only just resisting the urge to clap his hands over his ears so that he couldn't hear what the bastard was saying. He didn't want to hear what he'd been like as a baby. He wasn't sweet, he wasn't a little boy. He was a mature, adult alchemist.

Edward glared up at him hatefully, hands clenching into fists on his knees. How dare he say something like that? Pathetic platitudes that didn't make any difference at all. "He shouldn't have been sacrificed at all!" he snarled. "He shouldn't have died for anyone! What's so wrong with wanting to change things?"

DAY 36: LIBRARY

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