damned_institute | Day 27: Breakfast

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Day 27: Breakfast

Day came too soon.

Sora hadn't been able to find Rena, had instead been forced to crumple onto the grass of the recreational field and bleed all over himself, and hadn't even accomplished what he'd been sent out to do. What he'd been entrusted to do. He didn't know how he was going to be able to face Renji and the others, but he also knew he wasn't going to hide from them, either. That would just be low, after all, and he was ready to face up to the consequences.

He didn't try to make excuses for himself. Even though there had been a Special Counseling patient, they had managed to take her down by sheer numbers. The fact that he hadn't seen any sign of Rena was what had him the most worried. He hoped he could find her today.

The boy laid in his bed for a good while that morning before his nurse finally came in to collect him. She clucked over the bandages wrapped tightly around his chest and leg, and asked him if he was okay to walk.

Once Sora assured her he was fine (he didn't really want to use crutches, as that would just attract attention to himself, and he didn't need others worrying over him), they made their way to the cafeteria. Sora yawned and winced against the bright light of morning - it seemed even earlier than usual, and he realized why when they entered the cafeteria and found it empty.

The boy shuffled over to grab a chocolate chip pancake, a bowl of cereal, and a glass of milk (good for the bones, or so his mom had always told him) before settling at a table. He kept an eye on the door, hoping he would see Rena walking in soon.

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Morning was unpleasant, to say the least. Valyn found himself placed in some sort of chair contraption by two orderlies while a pair of nurses looked on. his throat was swathed in heavy bandages, one arm was in a sling, and he felt miserable. His throat still burned. But it burned on the inside, every time he tried to take a breath.

He barely heard the nurses, but what he did hear only made him angry. They claimed he'd injured himself. Ridiculous! As though he could inflict those wounds....

He was wheeled into breakfast and left by himself at a table, with a nurse keeping a close eye on him Breakfast was liquid through a tube. Ancestors, he wanted to be back in bed. He saw Keman and Max, but had no desire to speak to them right now. Not yet. He'd have to apologize, to say his thanks, but not yet.

He'd been an idiot. He'd been an idiot and he'd brought this on himself. And that thing had worn Shadow's face. His Shadow. It had felt like Shadow, looked like Shadow, sounded like Shadow....

Valyn hated this place.

Raine was relieved to find the pressing atmosphere gone when she woke up; it actually almost put her in a good mood. As long as she didn't think about what was to come in the near or distant future.

Even that, though, went right out the window when she saw Valyn--she'd seen people fairly badly injured before, but if he was any worse off he'd be in the infirmary. Or dead.

As soon as she'd gotten her breakfast (completely unaware that whipped cream was not usually used as a sausage topping), she sat down across from him and cast First Aid as discreetly as she could. It looked like it wouldn't help much, but considering the pain he had to be in, it was something. Using so much of her magic before she'd even eaten didn't help her much either, but nevermind that.

That done, she asked, "What happened?" If it didn't hurt him to talk...

Valyn didn't even notice the healing at the moment. He didn't particularly want to be seen like this, least of all by Raine. But there was nothing to do for it.

"Monster," he managed, his voice a hoarse, rough whisper. "My throat." Ancestors, that burned. He fumbled with his good hand for his paper and a writing utensil. Speaking was taking too much out of him and he needed all the strength he could at the moment.

Monster, looked like my cousin. It went for my throat and tore it. My shoulder as well. Keman cauterized the wounds, stopped the bleeding, kept me alive.

It wasn't the normal neat, fluid writing the elven lord displayed on his bulletin posts. It was shaky and like a child's hand, but it got the message across.

Nurses say I tried to kill myself.

Raine shook her head, disgusted. "It's unlikely anyone attempting suicide would tear out their own throat." Who in the world did they think they were fooling?

Not that this place operated on logic much.

"And I suppose they wouldn't just let you rest this morning?" He'd sleep easily enough if they sedated him, which would be the kind thing to do. Likely why they hadn't done it, of course.

Even if she'd had her full power back, there wouldn't have been much she could do to Landels itself, but that didn't stop her from fantasizing. If the dream she'd had days ago had been real, Genis could level the building with a few well-placed spells...

They'd come for her before. More than once. And it hurt so much to know that this time, they probably couldn't. Hurt even more to think that they might not even know she was missing.

Shaking her head once, she at least tried to start on her breakfast. She never felt very hungry lately, but she knew she had to eat.

Renji had gotten his breakfast before he spotted Valyn; what he saw had him hurrying over. He didn't know the woman that Valyn was with, and didn't really pay all that much attention to her as he walked up and deposited his tray on the table. "What happened?" he asked. Whatever it was, it would have been after Valyn had headed off with his friend. As the words left his mouth, he noticed the paper on the table, and read the short message there.

Valyn... had almost died. And he hadn't had any idea. Intellectually, he knew that was how it worked; the only people whose spirits he could even feel here were the other Shinigami, and of them, the only person he could really track without effort was Rukia. But even knowing that, he couldn't wrestle down the wave of guilt and rather useless fear that hit him. His expression didn't change, though his face paled a little.

No, didn't let me rest. Say I have to be watched, I'm dangerous to myself.

Valyn glanced up at Renji and just pointed at the bit of papers. Even though it looked as though the older man had already read the first one.

I didn't go near the Sun Room, he added quickly, lest Renji think he and Keman had ignored his warning. They hadn't. This happened on the second floor.

He really didn't feel like company right now, but it seemed he had no choice. He knew they were just worried over him, and as touching as it was....

"I'm sorry I can't do more," Raine replied. What was she, if she was a healer who couldn't even do that? That train of thought was never productive, but it was hard to get off it.

Deciding to be sociable for once, she turned to Renji. "Oh, I'm Raine Sage." So he was a little overly blunt; it wasn't as though she wasn't used to it--Kratos was one of many like that she'd met. At this point, she wouldn't mind seeing even him.

Renji looked at Raine, making a mental note of her name. "Abarai Renji," he said. "Abarai is my family name." That sort of introduction had become habit; more than half the people here did things backwards.

"I figured," he said to Valyn. "It's not really Ichimaru's style. He keeps it neat." Most of us do, compared to that. Swords were cleaner than teeth, always.

He still felt wrung out after last night, from the flash step. Still, he reached out and rested his hand lightly on Valyn's shoulder. He didn't say what he was going to do; he knew better than to ask for permission, and he normally just did what he wanted, anyway. He gave Valyn what little energy he'd recovered during the night; it took only a second or two before he was seeing stars and feeling the familiar tickle that told him his nose was starting to bleed.

Still, he managed to let go of Valyn's shoulder and then sit without making a production of it. Maybe he was getting better at this. Normally he'd be overjoyed that he was showing any kind of improvement at kidou, but not under these circumstances. He had the presence of mind to sit where he'd have the fewest people passing behind him; he'd already picked out his seat.

You didn't need to do that, Valyn scribbled quickly. I'm fine.

He'd been healed already, sometime between night and waking. And he did feel as though he'd eventually be alright, not like last night when he'd feared dying. Which only made him wonder about death - his death, specifically.

Raine is a good friend, he added, getting used to writing with his awkward hand. As is Renji. It was best to let them both know that he trusted them and considered them friends.

Raine tried to smile in reply; it was good to know he still thought of her that way, even after lying to his face when she had no real reason to. She wouldn't do that again--if someone really was her friend, they wouldn't care what she was.

To Renji, "I assume you're a healer too?" To be nice, she handed him a napkin--she was glad overtaxing herself didn't result in damage, at least. Passing out wasn't the best result either, but that was only when she really went too far.

At home, it hadn't happened since she was in her early teens. Here, she had to watch it or it would happen every night.

Renji shrugged and took the napkin from Raine, pinching his nose shut with it. "I wanted to," he said, his voice muffled and a bit nasal now. "And if you were fine, you wouldn't be relying on your beautiful handwriting to tell me that." The last was mostly a joke, though delivered in the same tone as normal.

"I'm not a healer," he said, after a moment. He shrugged one shoulder. "It's just something I can do that I'm not any good at." Though it was still better than most of his other attempts at kidou. He'd yet to blow himself or anyone else up with the healing spell. "I make a much better shield." So that told him that Raine was a healer. He'd make sure to mention it to Hitsugaya, and to Momo at some point. He smiled slightly. "Or an even better sword."

I'd like to see you get your throat ripped out and have your good arm in a sling and still manage to write well, Valyn wrote, his expression giving no indication as to whether he was jesting or was honestly irritated.

I met one of those monsters that disguises itself as a familiar face, he admitted. Physically, they're easy to defeat.

Physically. Ancestors, if Keman hadn't been there... would he have been able to kill something that wore Shadow's face? He doubted it.

Raine winced; that was one monster she especially dreaded running into. "I can guess why they're difficult in other ways." She wondered who he'd seen, but wasn't about to ask. Anyone he was missing back home might be too painful to talk about.

"Did it just get your throat and shoulder, or your legs as well?" Inquiring if he was just too weak to stand was also a little too much to ask, but it didn't cross her mind--as a healer, sometimes she did need to know what was wrong. And she'd mostly gotten those in her group back home to admit injuries or illnesses when need be... no small task in some cases.

Renji grinned and finally began picking at his pancakes, one hand still pinching his nose shut. He was hungry, which he supposed was a good sign. Maybe. "I can't even manage to write well when I'm in perfect health," he said.

He frowned at his pancakes. "We need to figure out a way to see through the disguise," he said. "Otherwise the paranoia will start to split what little we have apart." He'd had a small taste of what it was like to trust no one, or in his case almost no one. It would be very, very bad for getting anything at all accomplished at night.

He kept an eye on Valyn as he ate; he wasn't certain what to do, if he ought to offer some sort of comfort or not.

Valyn gestured weakly at his neck and shoulder, to indicate those were his only injuries. He sucked at the tube to take in some more of his liquid breakfast, wincing as he swallowed.

"Fuck," he muttered, the word strained and hoarse. He was growing quite fond of it. How long was it going to be before he could swallow without pain? Or breathe or speak without pain?

He picked up his pen once more.

There was no difference, not until it attacked. Everything was the same. Until it bit me, that thing was as good as my cousin.

Raine raised one eyebrow at Valyn cursing like that--where, precisely, had he picked that up from?

The news that her trust issues were justified here did not help her mood... she knew exactly what she would do if she saw Genis, probably alone and scared, appear out of nowhere during Nightshift--and even with Valyn's warning, she could still see herself just hugging him without a thought as to what she was really looking at.

"What did the creature say?" That was a start, at least. "If didn't know the things your cousin should have, that's helpful." If it did...

...well, she might start cursing as well.

Renji couldn't help but grin all over again at hearing Valyn cuss. It was some small indication that he'd lightened up, maybe. Or he preferred to think about it that way. It was just the flicker of a smile, though; his expression was very sober when he read Valyn's next note. "There's got to be some way of telling other than just reading their spirit." He pinched the bridge of his nose. "Something..." He could already guess the answer to Raine's question; Valyn wasn't one to be skunked by an imperfect copy. He was too sharp.

He looked up as Rangiku entered the cafeteria. He needed to talk to her, and considering how soon Hitsugaya wanted to chat, it needed to be now rather than later. "Fuck," he muttered. He reached out to touch Valyn's shoulder again - the uninjured one - though who he was trying to reassure with that contact, he wasn't certain. Maybe it was for himself, trying to remember that there were people other than Rukia it was okay to touch, or maybe that if injured, Valyn was still alive and that was what mattered.

"I gotta go talk to Ran real quick," he said. "I'll be right back." It wouldn't need to be a long talk, he figured. He stood, hand still lightly on Valyn's shoulder. He saw no reason to take his tray with him. With a last quick, small smile, he headed over to Rangiku.

Valyn wrote out his reply anyway, knowing Renji would see it when he got back. The man had said he wouldn't be long, after all.

It spoke just as my cousin would. And knew how to behave and what to say. It even used the diminutive only my cousin ever used. No one but Shadow ever calls me 'Val'. And no one knew...

Valyn paused in his writing. How to put this vaguely and delicately, and yet still get his point across? There were some things it just wasn't polite to bring out into the open, after all.

There were other, small things, that only Shadow would know. There was no difference. I'd venture a guess that this is the most dangerous creature in the building.

Raine nodded solemnly; this wasn't good. At all. "Even coming up with a coded phrase might not work, in that case." What could they do? She'd talk it over with Reinforce later, maybe they could come up with something.

Landels was hard enough as it was--and now the monsters were fighting dirty as well. All the prisoners here needed to band together or there honestly was no hope... and now they had reason not to trust.

She pushed her tray to the side of her; despite not having eaten much since she got here, she just wasn't hungry.

No. Keman was suspicious, but I thought it was only nervousness.

Valyn hated to admit that, that he had been warned and disregarded the warning, but now wasn't the time to let pride get in his way. He glanced at the pushed away tray and frowned before scribbling some more.

You need to eat. You have to keep up your strength.

Was he turning into a mother hen, too? (Not to claim she never did it to Genis. Or Colette.) "Well, I haven't lost weight yet," she replied, a little dryly. She had no idea if it was the truth or not--she didn't pay attention, and the pants of the patient uniform stretched at the waist. The food wasn't bad at all, but not a day had passed yet when she didn't have some reason to completely lose her appetite. It hadn't really happened at dinner yet, or she could imagine how Reinforce would react.

Then again--while she didn't want them nagging, at least she had people here now who cared about her. That meant a lot--and gave her something to hold onto when especially down. Not that she could bring herself to say it...

Don't be foolish. You'll exhaust yourself more easily if you aren't eating well.

Valyn knew well how important it was to be well fed when under stress of any sort. Three full meals a day made a large difference. And if Raine was using her magic on a regular basis....

And you should be glad you can eat, he added, with a gesture to his drink and the tube coming out of it. He couldn't even have solid food.

"I try," Raine admitted. He might be able to guess why she often couldn't bring herself to eat--while she'd pulled the tray back in front of her, she hadn't actually touched the food on it again. She tried a sip of juice, at least; liquids were usually manageable, even when she didn't think she could choke any food down.

She looked at his drink curiously; she didn't recognize it for certain, and that made her curious. At least she knew how to distract herself! "It doesn't look so bad, at least. What is it?"

That actually reminded her she needed to try to get some Gel ingredients. Hmm...

I don't know. It didn't taste like anything Valyn was familiar with. It didn't taste horrible, but it was hardly flavorful. And the smell of the breakfast cakes and sausages was making him hungry for something more substantial.

It doesn't taste like much of anything. But even swallowing the liquid bothered his throat, and he knew that trying anything solid would only cause him further pain. And possibly even a bout of choking.

[from here]

Renji returned from his conversation with Rangiku and sat in the same seat. He took a moment to glance at the paper that Valyn was writing on, just to catch up on what might have been said so he didn't ask anything that was already answered.

"I think your friend mentioned feeling suspicious on the message board," he said, going back to eating his pancakes. "I think from now on, it may be best to listen to such feelings." He snorted. "Though maybe not to the point of killing first and asking questions later. Did... it do anything in particular? You were with others... did it just attack you in front of them?"

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Day 27: Breakfast

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