Day 63: Magus Park (morning)

[idolism]

The buses’ trundling halt next to the park meant the “field trip” was officially in full swing.

Aidou couldn’t imagine there was much excitement to be had in the prospect. Assuming there wasn’t another zombie ambush or something similar, being able to roam Doyleton merely meant they had been transferred to a bigger cage until sundown. A bigger cage with nowhere to go.

The one new addition was the credit card. Aidou would’ve thought Landel would have wanted to get rid of the purchasing system, but apparently not. It was probably more enjoyable for him to watch and see what they would try to buy to better their stay, especially now, with his latest threat breathing down their necks. Aidou was tempted just to throw it away along with his sack of food, but pragmatism won out. In the end, he kept it in the pocket of his jacket. If an idea struck him, he would have it for later.

Since he had been in the aisle seat, Aigis had been required to file out behind him; once they were free and clear of the smelly contraptions he turned around to address her. “You have an idea of where you’re going, I presume? I expect you’ll want to look for your friends.”

Comments

[no_dont_go]

Aigis followed Aidou without really knowing what she was doing. It seemed to be no surprise to Aidou that she trailed after him. If anything, he seemed to expect it.

His question, however, caused her a brief moment of grief. She took a breath of the chilly air, her eyes glancing down to the shoes. "It would be best if they avoided me for now. I could at least check in with them over the bulletin board here."

It was less observed in town, but there was one if she remembered correctly. Aigis bit her lip. As to where she would go... "I should perhaps do some shopping. If I have a means to buy, I should not waste it."

[idolism]

He angled his head at that. “I highly doubt you’re contagious. What is the point in avoiding them?”

Aidou wasn’t fooling himself; he knew he had no business telling anyone else how to manage their suffering or how to deal with their companions, but if Aigis was indeed set on making preparations, then addressing her friends was a step in that direction. It wasn’t like she was going to transform right there in the middle of town. If Aidou had feared that, their exchange that morning would’ve had a very different tone to it.

But the town’s bulletin board… yes, that was a stop he was also going to have to make. Aigis wasn’t the only person Aidou had wanted to track down.

In response to her comment about shopping, he gave a small shrug. “There’s not many useful things to take back, but good luck with that.”

[no_dont_go]

"True..." It was more of the emotions that Aigis wanted to avoid. She knew how debilitating they could be to her here, but that didn't mean she should avoid them just because it meant she felt better. She owed it to them to tell the truth.

He was probably right. Most things they would allow her to buy would be useless. And she hadn't been able to talk with Carter much about bomb construction before he left. Her old plans to make a flame thrower were long behind her.

"Useless." Every moment she felt more and more worthless. If only Landel would speed up the transformation. Then she could just end everything all the more speedily.

[idolism]

And suddenly they were down to one-word responses.

If it’d been him in her place, Aidou would have expected to see more of a fight--the will to defy his opponent, the desire to cling to his own personhood. As a B class vampire, he had grown up knowing he ultimately existed at the mercy of those in the A class, that at any time they could make his power their own. The strong used the weak as they saw fit; it was the nature of vampire kind.

But the transformation from prisoner into monster… it wasn’t some kind of natural inevitability. It was something insidious, designed by a perverted mind to degrade his victims. If Aidou had to face down such a change, there was no way he’d just let it happen.

Aigis wasn’t fighting, though. She was just… sad. Defeated. Waiting.

Her listlessness had been apparent the night before, more so on the bus ride to town. But now it was practically seeping out of her pores, and it made him look at her with a frown. “Stop that,” he said at once. “I can see where you’re going with this and it’s stupid. Who are you feeling sorry for, yourself or everybody else? If it’s the latter, they don’t need you to. And if it’s the former, then you’re being a crybaby. It’s too early for a spiralling depression. You don’t even if you’ll get any sicker than this.”

[no_dont_go]

His words brought her up short. And like so many times lately, he was once again right. She had been just letting things get her down. Wasn't that what had almost led her into despair before, back after she had realized the roll she had played in delaying Nyx's return? If she let this get her down then she would not be helping anyone, least of all her friends.

"You are correct. I must not stop fighting." She didn't believe she would be getting healthy again, so she refrained from saying as much. Instead, Aigis only lifted her head high and made a quiet vow.

"Landel will not get what he wants so easily. And we have the back-up plan, if all else fails." She had not forgotten that. No, not at all.

[idolism]

“Good, because it’d be a bother if you started crying in front of me.”

Truth be told, if Aigis was at her limit, trying to shake her out of a stupor served little purpose. He couldn’t fight her battles for her. That wasn’t his responsibility… nor was it really within his ability to do so, anyway. Landel was the one with all the cards, much as he hated to admit it. Landel was the one with control over her fate.

Aidou could in reality do very little to better the situation… aside from fulfilling her request. That he could do.

All the same, the noble was glad she seemed to have strengthen her resolve to delay that potential outcome, if not outright avoid it. After a pause, he nodded, expression taking on a more grave cast. “There is that,” he said simply. “Rest assured, in that matter I won’t fail.”

[no_dont_go]

"Crying does not solve anything..." Though the sentiment is expressed was more than she could ever have hoped back home. But Aigis didn't want to cry over herself. She wasn't worth tears; not her own, or anyone else's.

She looked up with clarity shining in her eyes. Gratefulness. "Yes. I appreciate your assistance in that matter."

[idolism]

Indeed. Though Aigis had to know from personal experience that such things were easier said than done. Tears weren’t beyond her. He had seen that himself.

And tears… tears were for loss, weren’t they? Wasn’t this a loss, all these people potentially turning into something worse than even the most mindless ex-human?

Aidou found he couldn’t meet her look head on. Becoming an executioner and wielding such cold, hard mercy might suit a vampire who was free of certain moral trappings, but it was still insufficient. Not hardly worth thanking him for. “You shouldn’t be relying on death as a way out, you know,” he said after a moment. “At least be less happy about it.” After all, didn’t she want to live?