damned_institute | Day 62: Men's Showers (4th Shift)

This whole day had been quiet so far, and Kratos rather liked it that way. Aside from a mandatory therapy session, he had not been forced into talking with someone he didn't know under the pretense of making friends, nor had he been conversely accosted. There was still a report that he needed to give, if Sora would actually be around the next day for him to give it, but that was different. Reports and things of a more business-like nature agreed with him where small talk did not.

He was the first one into the showers for perhaps the first time, which meant that the often sought-after corner shower was now his for the taking. Kratos had no problem with communal showers, thanks to his time in the military, but the corner shower had this aura about it, this sort of vibe that clearly stated, "Do not bother me"--exactly what he was looking for, on a day where he'd enjoyed mostly peace and quiet.

Turning the water on, he waited for a few seconds under the spray to thoroughly soak his hair before reaching for the shampoo.

[OLD MAN CLUB MEETING NOW IN SESSION]

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The concept of communal bathing in of itself didn't faze Hakkai - he was, after all, Chinese - but the idea of bathing with total strangers made him uncomfortable on a personal level. There were far too many marks on his skin he didn't feel like explaining. Luckily, the nurse escorting him didn't seem to mind him waiting a short while for a quieter moment. He shed his clothing quickly, folding it and putting it one of the lockers with his glasses stacked on top.

Then he headed into the showers, determined to make this as quick a trip as possible. He stopped somewhat short though, when he saw that the only other person in the showers at the moment was somewhat decidedly not male. The mist from the shower heads made it hard to see, and he really was half-blind without his glasses on, but it was hard to miss curves like that. There was a moment of indecision - apologize, or flee and hope she hadn't noticed?

He was just starting to work the shampoo through his hair when he heard the sounds of bare feet on the tiles. He cursed mentally and glanced back over his shoulder to see if he knew who it was. If it was someone he hadn't spoken to before, he might be able to escape without having to make too awkward of excuses...

No such luck. Of course it was the one of the few people in the institute he'd actually spent any time talking to. That was exactly his sort of luck.

"Sorry," he said after what felt like one very awkward moment. "I'll be out of here in a minute." He hated hurrying himself out, but he didn't want to make things more uncomfortable than they were already bound to be.

The voice caught him totally off-guard. He squinted, closing his bad eye in an effort to clarify what he was seeing somewhat. "...Gren?" Yes, that did look to be his friend. Only with... breasts. That was pretty definitely not a figment of his imagination. He tried to keep his voice polite, carefully friendly - he didn't want to be rude.

"Aah, don't rush on my account. I can come back later, if it makes you feel more comfortable...." And he wouldn't have to try and explain the jagged foot and a half scar coursing down his stomach. His skin was already starting to redden slightly in the heat, making the taught white scar tissue all the more obvious.

Well, that hadn't worked, had it? Which, in retrospect, he should have known. Hakkai was one of those unfailingly polite people, and now they were just going to be trapped in a cycle of mutual embarrassment.

"No, it's okay. I mean, it doesn't really matter, now." Of course, it might not be just his own comfort at issue. If that scar was anything to go by, Hakkai had some secrets of his own.

"Aah, alright." Hakkai took one of the shower heads a few down from Gren. A little distance was more comfortable right now. He turned the water on as hot as he could stand - it stung a little along the half-healed cuts in his side and leg, but otherwise, the heat felt good. He turned to face the wall, and squinted at the dispensers until he found the one with shampoo.

The silence was hanging awkwardly between them now, though. "...It's not something shameful. Even the Merciful Goddess is... of more than one gender." And Gren lacked Kanzeon's other shortcomings, in Hakkai's eyes.

He knew Hakkai was probably trying to be helpful, but his words raised the ghost of the rage he still felt over what had been done to him, and he had to take a moment to keep from snapping at Hakkai. He didn't deserve that. It wasn't his fault.

"I suppose goddesses have the luxury of not caring what other people think," he replied, not able to keep the bitterness out of his voice. "But I didn't ask for this. It's just a bad joke."

Ahh... Hakkai winced internally. That had been the wrong thing to say - though from the bitterness he could hear in Gren's voice, he wasn't sure there really was a right thing to say. He was quiet for a bit, letting the hot water run over him and wash the shampoo out of his hair.

"...I'm sorry, then. Both for what I said, and what was done to you."

"Not your fault," he replied after a moment. "Sorry. I shouldn't have..."

He probably should have been grateful. So far as reactions went, Hakkai's had been pretty tame. Unfortunately, knowing that didn't particularly make him feel any better. He just needed to finish up and get out of there. Then maybe they could both forget about this.

Hakkai laughed, a little awkwardly. It was a tension release, more than actual amusement or humor. "Aha, no need to apologize. I came in thinking I'd have the place to myself." Which, no doubt, Gren had thought as well.

"It can be a little tricky," he replied. "You have to get the timing right."

He reached for more shampoo so he could wash through his hair one last time. At times like this, he seriously considered getting a haircut.

"Indeed." Hair clean, Hakkai reached for some soap to get the rest of himself clean. "Though next time I'll endure the company of others and give you some privacy." It was clear who needed it more, out of the two of them. And Hakkai was willing to push through his personal discomfort for a friend.

He wanted to be able to say no, that was okay, Hakkai didn't really need to worry about intruding, but the truth of it was that he was relieved. He may have worked through a lot of issues after he'd escaped prison, but this just wasn't one of them.

"Thanks," he said instead. "I appreciate it."

Day 62: Men's Showers (4th Shift)

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