Day 56: Sheriff's Office (Late Afternoon)

[freewill]

The conversation with Dean had been long overdue, and yet Castiel still felt like he hadn't had enough time with the man. There was simply too much to go over, too many facts that Dean needed to be filled on. It seemed like he would never reach a point where he was more or less on the same page with the man, and getting back to the point that they had been at when their timelines had matched up seemed impossible.

He also wasn't certain if he'd really accomplished that much, but Castiel was nothing if not persistent. He would track Dean down the following day and continue his work to get him on his side, because he wasn't certain he would be able to get anywhere without his help. Sam was... another story entirely, seeing how he was still so far under Ruby's spell. That was likely something that only Dean could snap him out of.

While he'd wanted Dean to accompany him back to the sheriff's office to see if it was now open, the man had apparently had his own plans, and so he'd been forced to part ways. It wasn't ideal, but he could hardly force Dean's hand before this; here it would more or less be impossible.

And so he headed to the sheriff's office on his own, walking up the three steps onto the porch and then peering inside through the window to see if it was open. It seemed that there were some people moving around inside, though most of them looked busy. That wasn't enough to stop Castiel, however. The office resembled some of the small town ones he'd seen while working alongside the Winchesters, so he would have to hope that he could get some information out of them.

First, though, he needed to decide on his strategy. Castiel lingered near the door as he thought through it. Should he ask about possible omens, signs of the Horsemen? Or would it be better to see if they had any idea of what was happening in Landel's Institute? What was his priority at this point?

[For Kaworu.]

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[moral-liberty.livejournal.com]

Without Shinji, Kaworu wandered.

Although he always appreciated Shinji's presence, desired it, sought it... without him he was able to see the town more clearly. His mind was less occupied by delicate words, and a nervous hand that didn't so much hold his as it did permit Kaworu to do so.

Kaworu's attention was free to go where it wished, and he found himself following paths he vaguely recalled. He could hear Yousuke and Naoto's voices, even if he couldn't recall their exact words. He traced their shared steps (weeks ago, now), and watched the contrast in his surroundings and his memories. The dark blanket of dread and death was lifted, revealing what was both mundane and pleasant. The humans tended to their lives, as real as could be imagined. He wondered, not for the first time, if he should favor their reality over his own.

He didn't doubt his life. Although there was much he couldn't describe in detail anymore, or much which he had never acknowledged, it was no less real. The years of nothing, they were sharp in their lack of emotion. They were even more pronounced when compared to his final days. All that he had not felt came to him at once, and he had been happy. Happy to live and to die.

He still was, or so he believed. There was so much doubt in this existence, though. The Lilim passed it through to him, and he made it his own. Fears and concerns that were too worldly, and had previously been so irrelevant. Still, he was satisfied to accept the decisions he had made. The promise to stay and to survive had been reiterated, and once more he had agreed.

His memories led him to a building he had followed Yousuke and Naoto to. They were gone now (dead or alive, it didn't matter), but the location persisted despite their absence. And outside the door, there was something that was familiar in a different context. Someone. He rearranged his thoughts and brought his mind to the more recent past, and the present as well.

"Hello again," he greeted, hands buried in his pockets. "It's Castiel, isn't it?"

[freewill]

At the exact moment that Castiel was preparing to step inside and give his best attempt at speaking with the officials, he heard a voice from behind him and turned to see a somewhat familiar face watching him. He had only spoken to this other patient once before, and it had been a very brief exchange. Despite that, Kaworu had seen fit to seek him out a second time.

"Yes, that's correct," he responded, only half-turning to the other patient. He would not allow this to distract him from his mission. "And you are Kaworu." It wasn't a question, exactly. His memory was too good for there to be any doubt in his mind.

There was definitely something about Kaworu that was off. Castiel could recognize it because he realized that he was that way himself. He didn't know what it was that made the young man stand apart, but he behaved as if he wasn't entirely there. Maybe that body wasn't his.

"If you wish to talk, it will have to wait. I'm planning to get some answers out of the officers inside." He nodded toward the door. Allowing the other patient to come along might be a mistake, as Kaworu could upset the questioning process somehow. On the other hand, there was no simple way to turn him away...

[moral-liberty.livejournal.com]

"I don't need to hurry," Kaworu agreed amiably. So long as there was the implicit invitation for him to remain, he would. Perhaps not for any particular reason. In fact, beyond the persistent curiosity he had in Castiel, the only cause to follow him in to the building was that he had not been told to leave. That in and of itself held meaning and fascinated him.

Castiel was difficult to read. His features held steady, and emotions resonated in a slow, quiet way. Kaworu believed he saw hesitation, but couldn't grasp its nuances. He didn't doubt the depth and layers, but he nor could he uncover them and analyze them. Perhaps he hadn't known enough Lilim, to now be faced with so much variation. So many that didn't fit. That denied fitting. That defined themselves as so wholly apart.

This man had his own business, and if Kaworu drew himself away from attempting to read what the lines in his expression meant, then that was also worthy of curiosity. Kaworu couldn't say he had taken much interest in this situation that they doubtlessly shared. He existed regardless, and beyond that, he had gained more here. Life and living had gradually become tangible experiences. However, he wouldn't fault others for attempting to undo it. It was inevitable that one day he should either return to his world, or become so immersed in this one that he would no longer be Kaworu. All was temporary. He only needed to wait, and was happy to do so.

"What answers are you looking for?" he asked, although he suspected it would be an unwelcome question. He smiled, maybe to assure Castiel of his intentions.

[freewill]

It seemed that Kaworu meant to say that he was willing to follow him inside. Castiel eyed him for a moment, wondering at how likely it would be for the strange boy to somehow upset his plans. He could always ask him to remain silent once they went inside, but somehow it felt strange to do so with someone he barely knew, especially someone so young.

Castiel straightened his shoulders, realizing that he was already getting distracted by his own inquisitiveness. He considered the other's question. "I would like to get an idea of our location, if possible, and also see if they have any idea of what is going on." Whether he meant what was taking place in Landel's or the approaching end of the world, even Castiel didn't know. He would have to judge how the conversation went and go from there.

He wasn't willing to waste any more time, however, and so without warning he opened the door and stepped inside. He took a moment, once he'd entered, to look around the station -- if it could be called that. It was small, only manned by a few people, and hardly fitting of its description. There was no urgency here, no sense that the people running this place were serious about catching criminals. That was obvious from the start.

This was not enough to deter him, however. Castiel approached the counter -- the only part of the office that was accessible to them -- and waited for only a few seconds before calling out. "I have a few questions," he said, his tone firm as he called to the rest of the room, hoping to catch someone's attention. He still didn't have the best hold on manners.

[moral-liberty.livejournal.com]

There was no immediate need to ask Kaworu to be silent. Castiel's desires were simple. He wanted to feel grounded, because of course, there was a sense of loss that came along with the way they had been removed from their previous lives. Kaworu'd mind suggested that his lack of attachment to the one he had once held contributed to his peace of mind, but he knew that was not the whole of it.

When he had awoken, he, too, had wondered. He had sought more. He had hoped to find something to hold onto, so that his life might retain its meaning. Meaning that he had only recently found. To have it taken from him was jarring, and he had felt so lost, as Castiel was now.

But then Shinji had appeared. It all felt pointless to concern himself with now.

Kaworu's eyes scanned the room with Castiel. It was unsurprisingly different from when he had first seen it. It was clean, full of life, light poured into the windows, Lilim tended to their business. Castiel seemed unsatisfied with what laid before them, but Kaworu thought it was simply plain. He followed close to the man, hovering at his heels and staring across the counter expectantly. The questions that would be asked were as valuable as the answers that might be given.

"Do you think that they'll speak to you?" he asked quietly. "Our reputation is well known."

[freewill]

"That is what I'm aiming to find out," Castiel replied to Kaworu under his breath. It seemed that thus far the other patient was willing to let him take the lead in this operation, which was how it should be. So long as Kaworu continued to only ask him questions, then it was possible that this interrogation could continue without incident.

After a few seconds had passed, a red-haired officer came to greet them from the other side of the counter. "How can I help you?" he asked. The smile on his face made it difficult to know if he recognized them as patients from the institute, but Castiel decided to press forward.

"Is it possible you can tell me where exactly this town is located?"

"Where?" the man shot back, looking a bit taken aback. "Well, I..."

There was only silence after that, as if the officer was simply expecting them to give up and leave. Castiel would not accept that so easily. "It would be helpful even to know the state," he continued. "This is the United States, isn't it?"

"Well, sure," the man replied, "but we were told by the nurses that we shouldn't tell you too much."

Castiel had figured this would be the case. It was a very simple question, and yet there were no fliers on the walls that gave any idea of the state. Almost as if it had been set up that way. He paused for a moment, trying to work out what his next approach should be.

[moral-liberty.livejournal.com]

The exchange went quickly, but it noticeably stalled on Castiel. Although the stranger radiated discomfort, he still seemed more grounded than Castiel. One voice held the unsteadiness of life, the anxiety of an uncomfortable exchange and a guilty refusa. Comparatively, Castiel sounded hollow. Not lifeless, not without feeling, but so different. Kaworu had long since given up staring at the man behind the desk, and had returned to watching Castiel. Little information was exchanged, and so Kaworu was more drawn to his companion's reactions. The fact that they were few and muted only made it more interesting.

An inquiry of location. A guilty refusal. Someone who, perhaps, wanted to help but was disallowed. Castiel presented the knowledge he already possessed, and wielded it sharply. But still, somehow, it was ungainly. Kaworu understood, he thought. It was difficult to say for certain, but he felt it as an echo inside himself. It was perhaps only a realization that he would have been unable to say how it would have done better, if he were to have asked at all.

But in knowing some of Castiel's wants, and in seeing what hadn't been gained, Kaworu acknowledged it was a failed endeavor. Castiel might try a different angle, he might ask again, he might beg, but this man believed he was helping them. It was a strong driving force for humanity. The need to care and to help, even against the wishes of the one they were protecting. Kaworu briefly wanted to ask why, as he craved an explanation or to know what he had been told, but expected it would ultimately go unanswered.

"To judge an individual as incapable or in need is to relieve them of their will. It's as natural for humans to want to protect as it is for them to hurt, and they are equally insistent in their pursuit of it." He addressed Castiel, but eventually his eyes moved to the man behind the counter. His hair was the same as Soryu's. "But even the decision to help can cause pain."

[freewill]

It was time to see just how much this man knew about the institute. He was only one person in this town, but he was supposed to be a man of the law and so Castiel could only assume that he would know more than most who lived here. As he was preparing his next question, however, Kaworu suddenly spoke up.

While he'd wanted to keep his gaze fixed on the man he was questioning, the words came so suddenly that he had no choice but to turn and stare at the other patient. Now that he was truly looking at him, Castiel realized that other than the red eyes, Kaworu had a pale and washed out quality to him. It was possible he was one of those albinos, a rare and peculiar sort of human.

And yet not human at all, with the way he was speaking. Castiel could follow what he was saying and even realized why he was saying it in the end, but the fact of the matter was that it wasn't likely to sit well with the officer.

When he looked back, the red-headed man appeared more bewildered than anything else. Castiel held back a sigh and worked to salvage the conversation. "He's right. Holding information from us will be of no help. Are you aware of what exactly goes on in that mental hospital? Their methods are not what you would call humane."

The man raised an eyebrow and then shook his head. "Look, I don't know anything about that. More than that, Landel's isn't our jurisdiction in the first place..."

So they would ignore it, then? Castiel frowned. It was so frustrating and yet so human.