With the way the subject matter continued to veer into the previous night, Shikamaru was having some difficulty maintaining his professional exterior. It didn't falter, but with all of the effort, he was starting to wish he'd napped instead of curling up in the corner. Not that he'd had an option.
Conscience. Did he blame himself for what had happened? He couldn't deny thinking it sometimes: if he'd paid better attention, used his chakra more efficiently, managed to deduce things more quickly...but no, Shikamaru was determined to only look forward. Even if everything that happened that day had been his fault, all he could do was learn from it and do better next time. He'd tried to believe that since he was thirteen. He still tried, but this time, his only success was keeping the doubt from his expression.
"It seems like the nights are getting worse," he said. "The zombies in Doyleton, then last night. It's affecting our morale, but there's also a chance we might be unknowingly involved in some kind of war between Landel and an outside force, and the opposing side is getting closer or gaining power. It's one of the reasons I was so interested in the ruins: I thought they might be a battle site. I don't have enough information to make any kind of educated guess, though." The statement was mostly thinking out loud, which had always been a habit of his, and he quickly returned to the subject at hand.
"You're right. It does seem like a completely different matter." Shikamaru wasn't certain, considering that even if one party murdered another, the degree of remorse would be limited given the knowledge that the other party would awaken the next morning. "I've never had to personally kill a comrade," he added. Though it showed his lack of experience, it also might excuse his lack of understanding for the degree of trauma involved.
And then the request. He'd partly expected it--most likely, she'd needed more people--and he was inwardly pleased that he'd impressed her enough to consider his group. Unfortunately, it meant that he'd have to go over Kakashi's head and accept her request, but given the circumstances and the offer, he was certain that the jounin would approve. He'd been trying to get Shikamaru to take more of a leadership role, after all.
"In my world, teams are usually made up of four people, but since there are only six of us here, we've been working in groups of three. Having a fourth wouldn't be any burden. I don't expect you to put your life on the line--we'd protect you, though as a vice-captain I doubt you need it--but for strategy's sake, I have to know any of your abilities or weaknesses that might affect combat. Sometimes I have to make decisions quickly, and it'd be safer for everyone involved."
That settled the question of whether he'd be able to spend the night alone, at least. Momo's offer might be vital to future success, even if he wasn't sure what the word meant in this place, so he couldn't turn it down.
Shikamaru could put off dealing with his emotions for another night. It wasn't like he'd never done it before.
no subject
Conscience. Did he blame himself for what had happened? He couldn't deny thinking it sometimes: if he'd paid better attention, used his chakra more efficiently, managed to deduce things more quickly...but no, Shikamaru was determined to only look forward. Even if everything that happened that day had been his fault, all he could do was learn from it and do better next time. He'd tried to believe that since he was thirteen. He still tried, but this time, his only success was keeping the doubt from his expression.
"It seems like the nights are getting worse," he said. "The zombies in Doyleton, then last night. It's affecting our morale, but there's also a chance we might be unknowingly involved in some kind of war between Landel and an outside force, and the opposing side is getting closer or gaining power. It's one of the reasons I was so interested in the ruins: I thought they might be a battle site. I don't have enough information to make any kind of educated guess, though." The statement was mostly thinking out loud, which had always been a habit of his, and he quickly returned to the subject at hand.
"You're right. It does seem like a completely different matter." Shikamaru wasn't certain, considering that even if one party murdered another, the degree of remorse would be limited given the knowledge that the other party would awaken the next morning. "I've never had to personally kill a comrade," he added. Though it showed his lack of experience, it also might excuse his lack of understanding for the degree of trauma involved.
And then the request. He'd partly expected it--most likely, she'd needed more people--and he was inwardly pleased that he'd impressed her enough to consider his group. Unfortunately, it meant that he'd have to go over Kakashi's head and accept her request, but given the circumstances and the offer, he was certain that the jounin would approve. He'd been trying to get Shikamaru to take more of a leadership role, after all.
"In my world, teams are usually made up of four people, but since there are only six of us here, we've been working in groups of three. Having a fourth wouldn't be any burden. I don't expect you to put your life on the line--we'd protect you, though as a vice-captain I doubt you need it--but for strategy's sake, I have to know any of your abilities or weaknesses that might affect combat. Sometimes I have to make decisions quickly, and it'd be safer for everyone involved."
That settled the question of whether he'd be able to spend the night alone, at least. Momo's offer might be vital to future success, even if he wasn't sure what the word meant in this place, so he couldn't turn it down.
Shikamaru could put off dealing with his emotions for another night. It wasn't like he'd never done it before.