damned_institute | Day 43: Chapel

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Day 43: Chapel

And just like that, the disorienting feeling of blacking out just to wake up in an unfamiliar bed came again. Alkaid had wondered if it would - everything about last night had been different, all the way from the zombies to the eerie emptiness of the Institute to the strange broadcast at the end of the night. Had the Head Doctor been shot? Damn, someone had gotten to it before her. And who was the voice at the end there? It was like she'd been allowed access to some kind of strange mystery that she could not understand, one that had been going on for a long time before she had arrived and would be going on for quite a while in the future, after she was gone. Had these strange sets of circumstances been bugs in this place's programming? Who could say?

The morning's intercom greeting was strange, as well. Federal training whatsit? It didn't seem like this happened very often, from the sound of it, but so much had happened since the last day she remembered that the former Demon Palace Emperor was ready to take pretty much anything at face value.

The room she woke up in was still empty. Wondering where to stick the half-cracked bat that she'd picked up last night, she shoved it under the mattress hastily when she heard footsteps in the hall.

The stupid nurse was the same as ever, though. Some things never changed. "Ahh, good morning, Eileen. It's so nice to see you awake."

Alkaid rolled her eyes at the nurse's chuckle, and shook her head. She didn't care that the NPC thought it was nice, she just wanted to see the rest of the institute already.. see what had changed! "Yeah, it's fantastic. Whatever! Just take me where I'm going and be done with it!"

It was just then that she realized that she was not wanting to devour the flesh of the nurse in front of her. And that the pain on her arm had kind of abated - she couldn't see through the thick bandages they had covered her arm with, but she wondered if her skin was still rotting off like a zombie. Had they somehow cured her infection overnight? Or was the nurse not human, like Alkaid had always thought?

There was only one thing for it: she had to go somewhere else.

"Chapel, sun room, or cafeteria, then?"

"Does it look like I care?"

The nurse sighed, then started walking Alkaid down the hall, up the stairs, and down another hall to the chapel. No one here yet, huh? That was weird. She couldn't imagine that no one else'd show up, but who could say? This place had been turned on its ass.

The chapel was empty so far, and kind of nondescript. She shooed the nurse away, and stood in the middle of the space between the pews, standing akimbo. What would happen today? What would she learn about herself... her situation? How long had she been sleeping? Was she really still going freaking undead, or had that been somehow taken care of?

All this would come to light really soon. She hoped. Geez, too many mysteries!!

[unwittingly awaiting Haseo]

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Okay, whatever the fuck happened last night, Ken could quite safely say that he did not want to see it happen again. He'd take mind-numbing monotony over zombies any day.

Speaking of mind-numbing monotony...by the time he woke up, Yukito--or Yue, whichever--had already left. Or never came back to begin with, but Ken really hoped that wasn't the case. His nurse, assuming 'Andrew' would want time for quiet reflection, or perhaps mistaking him for a practicing Christian, led him to the chapel after a short pause by the bulletin, just enough to scribble out a response to Artemis and realize halfway down the hallway that he hadn't signed it. Well fuck. He blamed it on being distracted by the fact that his leg fucking hurt.

...if Sister could hear him now, he'd be getting his mouth washed out with soap. For starters.

Tiredly, Ken found a pew and dropped into it, staring up at the stained glass windows and their studiously non-denominational patterns.

What the hell. How much could it hurt? Ken bowed his head and began to pray, something he hadn't done regularly since he was a kid. What was the worst that could happen? Nothing. They were all already in a pretty good approximation of Hell.

[Free, no limits!]

Edited 2009-08-10 09:52 (UTC)

This jarring wake-up was getting on Aya's nerves. No, it was past that.

His roommate wasn't there when he awoke, alive or just ushered out before Aya awoke, he wasn't sure for now. At least working at home allowed him the luxury of knowing if his acquaintances and teammates were alive when he went to sleep.

...at least he got to choose when he fell asleep as well.

Not that it mattered. Aya didn't feel like he'd slept at all as he sat up, choking down the lingering taste of salt and water and chasing the sent of rotted corpses away from his mind. His arm, he found was neatly bandaged and strapped into a sling. Didn't stop it from hurting.

He was ready to go when his nurse showed up and ignored every single word she said. The priority right now was to make find his teammates. Yohji was confirmed in passing by the Sun Room, and Ken had to have swept in as well because his scrawl was up on the board under their teammate's note.

Finding Ken in the chapel, kneeling and for all it looked like praying was unexpected. Aya slowed as he approached, then stopped. Would it do any good? He never had believed in heaven. Hell was where he pronounced Weiss' targets were going and deserved to be for what they'd done. Maybe this was hell. They all had died in the water and this was what he was trapped in, sentenced to for his own actions. Trapped in this place with only the faintest tease that she was alright.

Maybe...

His hand on the arm uninjured clenched.

Hell would have to try a lot harder.

Ken paused for a moment, feeling the presence of another person behind him. He spared a quick glance to confirm who it was--Aya, at least not someone trying to sneak up on him for purposes nefarious or anything. Though talking to Aya this early in the morning might not go very well, especially not with that look last night--the 'you have shit to explain, Hidaka' look, in conjunction with his terseness on the bulletin with Yohji. Ken's mouth curved in a thoughtful frown for a moment, before ending his prayer with a silent 'Amen.' He'd have to pester God another time.

"Morning." He pulled himself up, using the back of the pew in front of him for leverage, and settled into the uncomfortable wooden seat. Still designed to keep fidgety children awake during sermons, it seemed.

Aya moved forward, easing himself into the pew in front of Ken and careful not to jar his arm needlessly. Though the fact he was being careful about it was annoying all on its own. He sat sideways, his profile towards Ken and for a long moment he stared forward, silent.

At least, they'd managed to survive towards the morning.

"Ken." His voice wasn't frigid but it was cool. How long did they intend to try and keep him from it, whatever had happened in five years, while being in Landel's? "What do you and Yohji think keeping what happens to us from me is going to accomplish?" What exactly happened to Yohji for him to slide so far that accepting emotional support from Schwarz was an acceptable?

Edited 2009-08-12 01:36 (UTC)

Ken sighed, closing his eyes. Dealing with this first thing in the morning...wasn't his idea of starting out the day on the right foot. He took a moment to collect his thoughts, speaking slowly and deliberately.

"Not much happened to you. Actually, after the Tower and your sister waking up...you cool off a lot. You seem...more content, at least. After Omi leaves to become Persia, you become the leader of Weiss. It's not exactly a whole team you're put in charge of." And if anything was an understatement, it was that. "Sometimes I find it hard to believe that Kritiker didn't just...get rid of me. Yohji was a bit more...introverted about the whole going off the deep end thing. He was having hallucinations...they only got worse after he and I were sent to Europe. I didn't really notice at the time--I wasn't exactly in any state to. Both of us were in a bad way."

Something about the environment and his odd feelings this morning made this a lot easier to say--as if he were in confession. He probably wasn't lucky enough to be absolved of these sins, though.

The right foot? You mean the one that was eagerly chewed upon by zombies the night before? No. Even Aya wouldn't advise starting on that foot with such considered. This was a conversation that needed to happen and it was going to. Timing came in secondary, if Aya even considered it at all. The sooner they got past this nonsense the sooner they could start trying to function like a team again. If it was even possible, still.

Aya listened carefully and kept his face schooled other than a slight narrowing to his eyes. Hallucinations...

Their work wasn't something that someone could stay in and hope to stay whole. Not unless they had something to anchor them and even then, that was iffy. He'd...seen it happen. And Yohji had already shown something of the sort with that woman from Schreient.

"What happened to you?" Maybe to an outsider it would have sounded flippant, voicing a question like that in such a manner but Aya was anything but the sort. He was watching Ken. Ken who had always had his emotions on his sleeve, his emotions etched in honest lines. How much had that changed?

"I came very close to losing it completely," Ken said frankly, watching Aya in turn. "For the longest time, I thought being in Weiss, what we did, was nothing more than a necessary evil. I hated it. I was afraid, fucking terrified, every time we went out on a mission. I knew what we were doing wasn't right, neither were the people we were going after--but I never thought that justified what we did, not completely."

How else could he explain a descent that he didn't completely understand himself? It had taken him years to fall to the point he had finally hit--and just when he thought he'd gotten himself back, somewhat, to the way he had been--he'd found himself in this God forsaken place and the descent had started again, in its own way.

"That changed. I changed. I began to enjoy the missions, I wanted to kill, tear, rip--it made me feel alive. Everything else couldn't even begin to compare. When Weiss disbanded and we all went our separate ways, I went out looking for fights, with drunks, street brawlers, yakuza thugs--I didn't give a shit. I barely ate, slept less, and sometimes I tried to keep track of Yohji. Somehow I knew he was as bad off as I was. You stayed with Kritiker. Omi became Persia. And finally he decided he needed us back, probably where he could keep an eye on us." Ken snorted. "When he sent you to find us, I agreed to return to Weiss without even a second thought."

This was exhausting. Really it was. But he wasn't done yet.

"Yohji took a bit more convincing, but he returned as well. He'd been seeing visions of Asuka for the last few months, I think, and the drugs and drink probably only made it worse. The two of us were completely fucked up, and to balance it out, we were assigned two new kids, straight out of training. Kyo and I had already been...acquainted. Sena was never meant for it, but he had a relationship to our next target. Mamoru decided that the kid could be used to draw her out. It ended bad all around."

What Ken described was a possibility for all of them, no matter how much of a grip on their minds and actions they thought they had or not. It didn't wipe away the fact that they were killers and killing was something that left a mark on those left behind. A smudge that only spread out and built up the more deaths got racked up. You'd need something to ground you, to keep you sane or else...

That's exactly what would happen. Aya wondered, to himself, if she'd become that anchor for him. Was he in her life...?

An aside, one far less important than what Ken was revealing. Yohji's hallucinations, Ken's descent...and Omi. Omi who had told him that he was not a Takatori. Gone off and reclaimed that name and then started to apparently act like one. All of this was hard to swallow in one gulp, just like the history dumb Ken had given him two days ago. Aya's expression remained neutral, if anything he only seemed to grow more thoughtful as he started to spin all the information and attempt to make sense of it.

He was not, however, without a distinct pang of worry for the teammate beside him. "How?" Ken spoke like he'd pulled out of that spiral. And the rest...obviously there was still more to be said. Aya wasn't sure how this would affect what would happen when they got out of this place but he needed to know. He'd deal with what happened when it came.

"Sena blew his cover, and very nearly the rest of the team. As it was, it ended up getting Kyo killed. It didn't get Sena taken off the mission, which at the very least it should have, and the poor kid ended up dead. Shot by his own mother." Ken shook his head. He'd been...not at all friendly to the kid, which he sort of regretted. Sena really hadn't deserved any of that.

"Yohji...was involved with a secondary target. She offered to take away his memories...and he attacked you because of it. He decided not to go through with it in the end, but...well, he ended up with amnesia anyway. The last time I saw him, he didn't even know his real name." Ken snorted. "But here...I don't know. He's acting like he expects any of us to haul off and hit him at any time." Not that Ken hadn't already hauled off and hit him, but it was for a reason. "I think he was surprised I didn't attack him outright my first night here. That's why he's so...well, I'm assuming this isn't any news to you...dependent on Schuldig. From his viewpoint? We should all hate him at best, want to kill him at worst."

Well, that was everyone else. Ken could only hope that Aya would be distracted enough from the information dump that he wouldn't ask any more about him. Telling Aya that basically the only reason he'd bothered trying to get to some point of mental stability was so that he wouldn't feel like he was...inferior?...to Aya himself...that might end in awkwardness. 'I'm only sane because of you.' Right. Jesus Christ, that sounded stupid.

Worse then a mess. With all that going on it was insane to think Omi-Mamoru would have let the mission continue. Two team members dead and two more severely unstable? What was he thinking? And what was Aya thinking all through that? At this moment he couldn't do much more than listen with an odd sense of detachment. Like hearing a briefing about some other team which had spiraled down head first. Not his own.

Aya sighed, realizing now why Yohji had been so defensive on the bus when they'd talked. It made sense. Fit the pattern. Yohji kept trying to take refuge in exactly the things he shouldn't. "Idiot.." There was more than one idiot being mentioned with that short grunt.

"And then you ended up in England."

"Heading there, anyway. That's where you were." Ken shrugged, glancing up at the stained glass windows. "After the Koua clusterfuck, Weiss was completely disbanded. You went to America. Yohji, well..." The amnesia had meant he stayed in Japan, obviously. Got married, had a new life--completely guilt-free. "Mamoru called in a few favors, at my request, and I ended up in Tokyo Prison for a while. It was the only place I felt like I could go to try and get myself back in order." It had actually worked somewhat, too. At least until he got here.

"He remembers everything now." All too acutely considering how they'd clashed "Did he get his memories back when he got here?" Aya could only try to imagine what the onslaught of all that on top of being in Landel's could do. No wonder...if that was what happened then he was a perfect target for Schuldig to latch onto.

There was a considering pause before Aya asked another question, his gaze focused on Ken in that unerring manner. A prison? Most people would consider that the last place to find themselves, though Ken was more than capable of taking care of himself when it came to the other inmates. "Did that work for you? Prison." A self-imposed sentence.

"No...as far as I can tell, he's from just before he got the head injury that caused it in the first place," Ken replied--after a brief hesitation. That had been long enough ago, and long enough since he'd even ever thought about it...he hadn't even considered that possibility. Ken shook his head. The perceived betrayal, the months--years--of spiraling down...that would be more than enough to make Yohji doubt himself.

"...well enough. I'm a model patient, only time I ever picked a fight was...well, with you." And that had been completely justified in his opinion, thank you very much.

He'd agree. That was more than enough without the added chaos of regaining one's memories. This conversation didn't change Aya's opinion that Schuldig was just about the last person Yohji should be clinging to, but it did soften then anger which had flared from not understanding exactly what had driven Yohji to such a point.

Was it surprising that they'd gotten into a fight before? Even if it was an older alternate version? Not really. First impressions tended to stick around and considering theirs consisted of a fist-fight that wrecked the flower shop...

"Over what?"

Aya would speak to Yohji when he saw him again.

"...your sister," Ken said, quite honestly. "And what happened just before you were pulled here, before." It had been so long ago, that Ken couldn't remember if there was anything else to it, the exact words that had been said--whatever they were, they had been angry, spoken in passion from both sides. How many days had it been since then? Ken shifted awkwardly as he recalled one detail of that confrontation, the feeling of being yanked close--by his hair even, fucking prick--and the tickling of Aya's breath moving his hair. His hair that was now drifting down over his face as he ducked to try and conceal the flush of his cheeks, and God damn the fact he blushed so easily.

Why would...?

At mention of his sister, a flash of confusion arched across his brows. Why, exactly, had they been arguing about that? The youngest Fujimiya was no business of Ken's- even if it did end up leading him to the knowledge that she's safe.

And why the hell was Ken blushing-

No. Hell, no. "What did you do?" Hissed. Better talk fast, Ken.

...well, that was jumping to the entirely wrong conclusion. Ken really shouldn't have been surprised, though, since Aya had such a God damn sister complex.

"Nothing!" Ken barked back, embarrassment thoroughly flying away in the face of indignation. What the hell damn fool conclusions was he flying to now? "What the hell makes you think...She's your sister. I don't have a deathwish or a desire to get anything cut off, thank you very much!"

Aya had already twisted around in the pew, reach out and grabbed Ken's shirt as soon as he heard that 'nothing'. It was an insanity even worst than what Ken had just gotten done explaining to him but wouldn't that just be a icing to the whole fiasco?

He said nothing through Ken's protests, just kept his grip there tight and glowered. Aya tended to try and employ some form of logic, even if it was twisted at best, but any mention of her made all that jump ship.

Edited 2009-08-21 08:13 (UTC)

Oh Jesus Christ, didn't the hotheaded bastard ever listen? Ken knew he was bad sometimes, okay, a lot, but Aya put him to shame sometimes.

"For fuck's sake, Aya, let me go before you get yourself or the both of us sedated," Ken snapped, eyes flashing. "I would never..."

But how well did he listen to that the last time? Not at all, really. Ken was hard-pressed to think of anything he could say that would make Aya let him go before it came to blows. Finally, it came out in a low, unbidden hiss of breath, something that he wasn't altogether sure of, even afraid of, but would certainly shock Aya enough to jump-start his brain. He could figure out the whole truth about it when he wasn't about to be punched in the mouth. "I don't even...I don't like girls, okay?" Hopefully the red-head was aware enough of what he was saying to understand what he was saying. "Much less your sister, so you can stop jumping to your God damn crazy conclusions."

Ken glared, straight at Aya. "I was pissed off because you never contacted her. Because you actually have someone who gives a shit about you, and you were just throwing that away out of some misguided fucking idea that it'd keep her safe."

Edited 2009-08-21 08:51 (UTC)

Aya didn't let go, because letting go meant backing down he was absolutely positive. Hell, he'd already skipped over the possibility of Ken being 'that bastard' who decided he was worth being near her. Ken was just already there in his grasp to have it projected on. But then...

"Good." Then he'd made that decision and he would have kept her away from him and in that respect, safe. Aya came back out of the rapid race of his thoughts to respond to that and was working backwards in all that Ken had said. It was better for her, easier to believe that her brother had gone on with their parents instead of becoming a paid killer who stole her name. That wasn't her burden to carry and he didn't want it weighing on her at all. She was to-

Wait.

Aya's eyes widened. Yeah, that'd be Aya's version of the mental wheels grinding to a full and complete stop. "You don't-?" There'd been that woman though, right? The one caught up with that toxic sports drink.

Edited 2009-08-23 04:20 (UTC)

Yes, there had been that one--Yuriko, and another after her--but the way that it had all ended had very nearly scared him off of intimate relationships altogether. And then, well.

He wasn't about to say he'd been...well, together with Aya, the one who'd been in the hospital before. Ken still wasn't altogether sure where they'd stood, and now he supposed he'd never find out. But that would be too much for Aya to take.

Ken reached up to pull Aya's hands away from his shirt, silently cursing that he hadn't thought of anything else to say. "I'm not much for men either," he said slowly, reassuring himself of it as much as Aya.

If that extra bit of info had been tacked on there was a high chance key parts of Aya's mind might have shut down. When Ken moved to get his shirt back, Aya simply let go and drew away. Right, that next bit still went down the line of more information than Aya deemed necessary to know about Ken's preferences. Not to mention it was a weak addition at best.

You know?

They should have just stuck to the spiraling descent into madness.

Aya grunted, one of those non-committal sounds which meant a books worth and feigned indifference at the same time. He'd gotten what he needed and a whole basket more from this conversation. They should probably stop before anything else not expressly pertinent to their situation came up.

The swordsman pushed himself to his feet and glanced down at his teammate.

Ken sighed and crossed himself, heedless of Aya's eyes on him. The chapel hadn't provided much calm today. The nurses were starting to guide their patients out, the intercom crackling to life and making another strange announcement. I.R.I.S., inspections...after nearly a month of the same mindnumbing routine, these new developments were rather unnerving. He had no idea what they meant, and they probably wouldn't find out until nightfall.

God, that really hadn't gone the way he wanted it to. Ken stood, sighing out a deep breath he didn't remember taking, eyes closed, and turned to walk out of the sanctuary. Now all he needed was to fuck up with Yohji and this fucking wonderful day would be complete. It was barely even noon.

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Day 43: Chapel

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