She said it again. He hadn't misheard. Itachi took another deep breath, his eyes closing for a moment involuntarily. He didn't even have control over his reactions at this point.
The girl didn't even seem to notice how strange it was to face a person and tell them they'd died. Perhaps she already knew about the time differences. Itachi's mind latched onto the pointless little observation, unable to comprehend the entirety of this new knowledge.
It wasn't that he had ever been afraid of death. He just hadn't thought about it much, not in that way. It had been an abstract concept, one to work with in theoretical calculations, but anything that involved him being laid low had been outside of his basic understanding.
He could see that now, he was aware of things now that he had never even conceived of before. Before being deprived of something he identified as me, myself, Uchiha Itachi more than his own face. Before being physically overpowered, unable to see and unable to see, unable to have his way without even trying. Before scrabbling around powerlessly, before knowing what it was not to be able to put reality into motion merely through willing it. Now he knew what the sensations of uncertainty, anxiety, vulnerability were, and he knew that there was so much he had not understood before. Not things that he had needed to understand, mind, but he also hadn't understood death and he didn't need that realization now.
What if staying here was the only way to stay alive? What if he really was going to fail (he could hardly even believe the existence of the word)? What if -- what if he were already dead?
No. This was stupid. He wasn't dead, and he wasn't going to die, he couldn't. He needed to focus, deal with the situation, accomplish his goals one step at a time. Sasuke -- he didn't even want to think about to handle that one. Sasuke was here (Sasuke was going to kill him) but he couldn't afford to care. He didn't care about any of this, he didn't care what this worthless girl did with her life, he just wanted to (live) get out.
"Of course I know what he wants," Itachi snapped. "I'm his brother." Reducing Sasuke to a list of easily-predicted goals was so much more convenient. (His own brother was going to kill him.)
no subject
The girl didn't even seem to notice how strange it was to face a person and tell them they'd died. Perhaps she already knew about the time differences. Itachi's mind latched onto the pointless little observation, unable to comprehend the entirety of this new knowledge.
It wasn't that he had ever been afraid of death. He just hadn't thought about it much, not in that way. It had been an abstract concept, one to work with in theoretical calculations, but anything that involved him being laid low had been outside of his basic understanding.
He could see that now, he was aware of things now that he had never even conceived of before. Before being deprived of something he identified as me, myself, Uchiha Itachi more than his own face. Before being physically overpowered, unable to see and unable to see, unable to have his way without even trying. Before scrabbling around powerlessly, before knowing what it was not to be able to put reality into motion merely through willing it. Now he knew what the sensations of uncertainty, anxiety, vulnerability were, and he knew that there was so much he had not understood before. Not things that he had needed to understand, mind, but he also hadn't understood death and he didn't need that realization now.
What if staying here was the only way to stay alive? What if he really was going to fail (he could hardly even believe the existence of the word)? What if -- what if he were already dead?
No. This was stupid. He wasn't dead, and he wasn't going to die, he couldn't. He needed to focus, deal with the situation, accomplish his goals one step at a time. Sasuke -- he didn't even want to think about to handle that one. Sasuke was here (Sasuke was going to kill him) but he couldn't afford to care. He didn't care about any of this, he didn't care what this worthless girl did with her life, he just wanted to (live) get out.
"Of course I know what he wants," Itachi snapped. "I'm his brother." Reducing Sasuke to a list of easily-predicted goals was so much more convenient. (His own brother was going to kill him.)