Jiraiya didn't answer at first, instead blinking his eyes a few times. His vision was a little more blurry than he liked. Luckily, it only took a few blinks to take care of it, and then he was able to look at Naruto again.
"I should have told you when we were training," Jiraiya answered truthfully. "I wanted to tell you how proud Mina--your parents--would have been of you. About how you were like both of your parents..."
"But I guess I was afraid," Jiraiya's voice dropped to something quieter--it was hard to admit. "Of your reaction, maybe. Or maybe the elders. It.. seemed so much clearer, my reasons, before I--"
Jiraiya barely stopped himself in time, his words ending abruptly. That was the last thing he needed to tell Naruto now. I'm your godfather. We're family. And I'm dead, just like all your other relatives.
"... Before I realized some things," Jiraiya chuckled weakly. "A lot of things. That even I can't live forever, and that I don't want to die with regrets. Not telling you about your parents wa--would be one of them."
Damn it, he was slipping. Damn it! He had better control over himself than this. Had this place, had the 'return' of Naruto's parents, had his death really shaken him up this much?
"But I should have had more faith in you, and I should have told you sooner," Jiraiya continued, as if the slip hadn't happened--Naruto probably wasn't observant enough to notice it, anyways, and for once Jiraiya was grateful for that. "Even if I haven't been the godfather I should have been."
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"I should have told you when we were training," Jiraiya answered truthfully. "I wanted to tell you how proud Mina--your parents--would have been of you. About how you were like both of your parents..."
"But I guess I was afraid," Jiraiya's voice dropped to something quieter--it was hard to admit. "Of your reaction, maybe. Or maybe the elders. It.. seemed so much clearer, my reasons, before I--"
Jiraiya barely stopped himself in time, his words ending abruptly. That was the last thing he needed to tell Naruto now. I'm your godfather. We're family. And I'm dead, just like all your other relatives.
"... Before I realized some things," Jiraiya chuckled weakly. "A lot of things. That even I can't live forever, and that I don't want to die with regrets. Not telling you about your parents wa--would be one of them."
Damn it, he was slipping. Damn it! He had better control over himself than this. Had this place, had the 'return' of Naruto's parents, had his death really shaken him up this much?
"But I should have had more faith in you, and I should have told you sooner," Jiraiya continued, as if the slip hadn't happened--Naruto probably wasn't observant enough to notice it, anyways, and for once Jiraiya was grateful for that. "Even if I haven't been the godfather I should have been."