damned_institute | DAY 26: Men's Showers (Second Shift)

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DAY 26: Men's Showers (Second Shift)

Gluttony didn't want to leave his Lust, not after he'd just found her! But the mean tasty nurses said he had to. "You can't join her in the women's showers" was a bad excuse. He didn't like the mean tasty nurses. Maybe Lust would let him eat them later. Still, he knew he would see his Lust again, and that was good. He liked Lust. She was good and beautiful and smart and kind. Why did they have to take him away from his Lust?

Still, he would see her again. And she would tell him it was okay to eat the tasty nurses, and that would be good. His new friend liked eating people, too. That made him happy to find a friend who shared a love for eating people. Today was a very good day.

As he entered the showers, he stood under a shower head and opened his mouth wide to drink up the water. It wasn't as good as eating people, or eating waffles that didn't scream when he bit into them so weren't nearly as good as eating people, but it was still swallowing something, and that made him feel better.

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That attempt was just as futile as all the other ones had been. Sheesh, Ashton just couldn't hide something like that, could he? It didn't take a scientist to realize that Ashton was extra-virgin as well as extra-nervous, and that knowledge made Xigbar grin. Honestly, he was surprised no one had at least tried, considering how gosh-darn adorable Ashton was. Not bad-looking, either... and if he was left high and dry, then Xigbar wouldn't have just Ashton on his tail.

Mm, but he couldn't just teleport away. That'd put a damper on the matter.

Regardless, the Nobody let his fingers trail down Ashton's spine, the motion more light and less cleansing than what he had been doing before. "Y'know," he conversationally stated, "it's not nice to lie to your friends. You're about to jump right out of your skin just like this. 'Lots of guys'? Bo-logna."

Then he spoke in a somewhat hurt voice. Ashton was a soft heart, after all; that was an easy way to take advantage of him. "Just 'cause I'm a predator doesn't mean that I'm on the hunt all the freakin' time. But if you don't trust me even a little, then just say so. I can take it. You're a big boy, you could probably scrub your own back anyway if you don't want me around."

Ashton was such an easy target when it came to stuff like this, and the worst part was that he was somewhat aware of that fact. Even so, he didn't feel completely okay just telling Xigbar to back off, especially when he played that card. That trust card.

"I- .. aahh," the swordsman couldn't help but gasp as those fingers trailed down his skin. "Okay, okay, fine. You're right. I, uh, well."

Why was it hard to say? "Okay, I- I trust you a little bit. I do. We fought together, after all." He leaned forward into the steamy water spray, the lather of shampoo rinsing his hair clean.. "B-but you don't have to scrub my back if you don't want to. I mean, I'm fine showering myself. But.. uh, I dunno."

Something had been bothering him for a little while, though, and now was as good a time to ask as any. "Hey, could you tell me if there are any scars back there? I mean, where the dragons were."

Way too easy. Just squirm up some vulnerable points, and some people fell apart. So Ashton had trust issues, huh? Real good to know. Just like knowing that Ashton gasped real pretty; it was probably a good thing that the brunette didn't have eyes in the back of his head, or the gleam in that yellow eye of Xigbar's might have scared him off.

In the meantime... he quietly hummed to himself as he ran his hands over that strong back, barely listening to what the other man was saying. How to proceed? Go for quick gratification, or drag it out a little? Let Ashton think that he was normal, just 'misunderstood', or cause enough of a scene that guys would be talking about it for weeks? Oh man, so many choices!

To give himself a little space to think, when Ashton asked that question Xigbar leaned forward, wrapping his arms around Ashton's chest and pressing his own front against Ashton's back, the better to nuzzle into now-clean hair. "Kinda... circular-shaped scars, one on each shoulder blade, both 'bout the same size? Those kinda scars?" Yep, he was going to pull Ashton's leg until he thought of just what to do with the young man. Honestly, communal showers were just asking for something like this, weren't they?

Too close! So close! Close!

A naked, slippery hug was kind of pushing the limit for Ashton, and the strained look that crossed his decidedly flushed features only compounded when he realized that Dias was probably in here, Claude too, and the chances were somewhat high that they were watching this entire charade go down.

This was terrible, but- but- he wasn't going to let Xigbar keep him from getting clean! He raised his hands to rub the water out of his eyes so he could open them and see.

That was when Xigbar's words sank in, really sank in. And he stopped squirming to freeze. "Y-you mean there are scars? Oh man, they must have cut them off! That's .. that's terrible. That means.. that means they're probably dead."

His entire body seemed to sink.

Aw, Ashton looked like a little kid whose puppy had just died. Which wasn't too far from the truth, all things considered. Some dragons were kinda puppy-like, or so Xigbar had found. Made shooting them easy as breathing, too.

As though he could offer some consolation, Xigbar's hug tightened a bit, becoming almost conciliatory and comforting. Despite lacking a heart, he was still a warm body and he could mimic how people with hearts were supposed to feel; came in handy for moments like this. "Hey, don't look so down." Once more the Nobody rested his cheek on Ashton's hair, perhaps a bit more 'motherly' than the 'good-friend-with-benefits-trying-to-cheer-you-up' bit that he was going for, but eh, whatever.

But he couldn't resist a little chuckle as he explained. "I mean, there's nothing back there like that, so you can take that as you want."

Ashton breathed a sigh of relief - or at least as relieved as he could feel in this position right now. Gyoro and Ururun weren't necessarily dead, and that was the best feeling he'd had in weeks. Whether or not he would associate that feeling with Xigbar's arms around him would remain to be seen. He kept trying to remind himself that Xigbar didn't have a heart, and that he couldn't feel anything, but that fact was turning out to be just another one of those things that Ashton would end up either ignoring or forgiving in other people.

He smiled, the first real smile he'd had since seeing Claude this morning. "They're not dead, then. They're not dead. I'm so happy!" And his hand, slippery from soap, lifted up and brushed against Xigbar's forearm, in what might have been a gesture of goodwill.

Who knew how long this sudden happiness would linger, who knew when it would be replaced by doubt like everything seemed to do recently. "Thanks, Xigbar. I mean it, thanks. Here, if you get off, I'll wash your back, too."

Now that was not what Xigbar had imagined. A smack in the face for yanking him around? Sure. Storming out because of what had happened? Totally understandable. But actually smiling and being happy because of it? Not anywhere in the playbook. So the Nobody's one eye widened in bafflement at the gesture of supposed good will, and he stiffly jerked back in his confusion.

Obviously, either Ashton was crazier than thought, or he was a lot more big-hearted than Xigbar had imagined. Weird, weird, and very weird. In that order.

At any rate, the Nobody abruptly sat down on the bench and moved his hair so it was hanging down the front of his body, letting Ashton have full range to his scarred back. It was just a strategic withdrawal, really; he'd figure out something later on, he was sure.

Oh, Ashton managed to confuse Xigbar when it counted, didn't he? It was a scene oddly reminiscent of that time in the kitchen Ashton's first night. Not that that thought actually crossed his conscious mind, though.

In the end, it was true that Ashton was incredibly forgiving, so much so that the greater slight he was provided normally made him turn the other cheek with greater (and more reckless, some would argue) enthusiasm. Who else would end up becoming best friends with the monsters who, many might argue, could permanently lower the quality of one's life?

Humming to himself as he lathered up a washrag with liquid soap, the hapless swordsman happily went about moving the rag in wide, circular motions over the predator's back. Hmm, Xigbar really looked different when his hair wasn't in that ponytail, didn't he?

"These scars.. How'd you get them, anyway?" It was if Ashton actually cared. Which he did, oddly enough. Probably a poor choice.

Weird. Weird weird weird. It wasn't that Xigbar didn't like the hands on his back, or the humming swordsman to which they were attached, but the entire situation was just... odd. Normally Xigbar was unconsciously braced for a stab in the back, but with Ashton, it was like he could relax. Which was odd in and of itself, but especially moreso because of what they'd gone through. Or what Xigbar had put Ashton through. Whatever.

Oh well. Might as well enjoy the novel experience, especially since Xigbar's mind was already churning with possibilities. And if Ashton did care, then he could afford to be pushed a little. If not, then it'd come to light pretty quick. "Which ones? You'll have to trace them for me, I forget which ones are what unless someone points 'em out."

After all, if Ashton could get a little less blushy about it, then Xigbar could do more as a result... yeah, this could work. Maybe.

Ashton had clearly never washed another man's back before, and he hadn't had any real younger siblings to help wash, but he found it calming enough. Xigbar's back was muscular too, in an oddly sinewy way, and riddled with odd scars that he let his sword-callused hand drift over.

"Well, there's this one," tracing a deep scar from the edge of the Freeshooter's left shoulder blade diagonally down his side, almost to his hip. Another man's body.. it was becoming oddly natural to clean it, and his blush had faded to just a minimal pink. As long as he didn't look at Xigbar's ..bits, or get too close, he was going to be fine.

"Hmmm," he added, taking on a dramatic, mysterious tone, "it also appears that there are also these big circular-shaped scars, one on each shoulder blade, both about the same size.."

Xigbar barked a laugh at that, grinning at Ashton's sudden mysterious tone and and the far too dramatic styling. Hey, the kid was starting to pick it up! Good for him!

As for that one scar... well, at the start, Xigbar just let his grin linger, enjoying the feel of calloused fingers sliding over his body, something nice and easy now that he was all soaped up ~~with nowhere to go.~~ Kinda nice, really. "Sultan's guard," Xigbar murmured, "was snooping around to figure out where a genie's lamp was, got caught, got carved up kinda good before I got out. One of 'em nabbed me from behind, so it took awhile to get it sewed up. Hah..."

And here Xigbar tilted his head so he could glance at Ashton, that lopsided grin still on his face. "Guess they didn't want me taking phenomenal cosmic power away from 'em. Who woulda thought?"

Ashton laughed when Xigbar did, happy to be in a relatively calm situation with the Nobody, one where he wasn't afraid that he was going to be suddenly kissed or anything. Such naivete would certainly prove dangerous in the end, but Ashton wasn't afraid for his physical safety in the least.

"Oh, really?" Ashton said, interested in the story. Sure, he didn't know what a sultan was, or even a genie, but he could imagine. Phenomenal cosmic power? Oh, wow. It was a grand idea, a fantastical one that seemed like it would best fit in a storybook. "That sounds .. that sounds a little exciting. It's sad you didn't get the genie's lamp, though. It's great to have power," he said rather matter-of-factly, almost as if he was innocent of fighting and killing hundreds, if not thousands, of monsters (and people.)

His soapy thumb gently lifted to trace the scar on Xigbar's face, visible now that the other man had turned around to face him. He was getting a better look at that scar now than he had before, as he'd normally only seen the guy in the dark, so he got a little closer. "Hmm, then there's this one," he said in a more hushed tone.

Yep, that was a very dangerous sort of naivete, and yet Xigbar was still too disarmed to take advantage of it. Had to be because he loved boasting and telling stories, and it was a rare enough situation when he actually got a willing conversation partner. Especially one who had the heart to actually be interested, instead of just pretending... or not, in the case of most of his fellow Senior Members.

"Nah, someone like you should be glad I didn't get it. We were planning on turning the Genie into a Nobody, then turning all of Agrabah into a crawling hole of Heartless. Not exactly what a goody-goody like you would've liked." Not that Xigbar meant that too unkindly. He just knew that Ashton was a softie, and he wouldn't like the idea of thousands of people losing their hearts. Even if it was for a good cause.

As for the scar on his face? Xigbar took Ashton's hand in his own, abruptly nuzzling into it with a cat-like enigmatic grin. "Sorry, but that one I don't know you well enough to blab about. Same with the eye."

Yes, Ashton was very pro-emotion and pro-heart, but that didn't keep him from feeling understanding towards his heart-free friends. Even if they were really bad guys. Who did lotsa bad things, like Axel had told him. It was just one of the byproducts of being part monster.

"Ah.. I understand about your face scars. I'm sorry, it must be very private." He nodded his head, then turned his body to the side a little bit, pulling his hand back toward himself, so he could return to scrubbing Xigbar's back. Oh, Ashton was no stranger to learning about scars in the shower. The last time he saw some...

Well, last time's scars were no normal scars either.

He bit his lip, suddenly feeling a little nervous. Change the subject, change it, change it away from that "Why were you going around turning places into Heartless holes? I mean, not that I'd judge you any for it, you obviously know that, b-but.." he said, quickly trying to defend himself.

Yep, very private stuff, there. Xigbar didn't mind shifting the topic of conversation back to something else entirely, especially since Ashton was a very dutiful ~~uke~~ back-scrubber. When was the last time Xigbar got someone to do this? Waaaaaay too long.

Then there was that question, and Xigbar abruptly grinned as he turned around, taking Ashton's hands in his own and placing them on top of Xigbar's lean chest, right above where his heart was supposed to be. 'Supposed' to be. But he didn't have a pulse, didn't have anything there. As a Nobody, that was simply how it went. "'cause I don't have a heart," he said with the simple ease of a professor lecturing a student, "an' Xemnas had an idea. If we capture a lot of hearts and force them all together, they get more power, see? And if we get enough... we could get our hearts back. The Big Man said to do it, so I did. Tried to, anyway."

His one eye gazed into Ashton's two, that grin suddenly shifting into a completely neutral, emotionless expression. "...me? I just wanna get back to the way I was. People like you an' the Big Blue Machine? You don't even know how important a heart is. Nobody does except for Nobodies, an' we can't even get them back without tearing worlds inside out an' upside down. Heck if I've ever seen the beat."

Ashton looked dejected, dropping his gaze from Xigbar's one eye to his chest. Heck, Ashton hardly noticed his own heart beating, save when he was in an adrenaline-fueled situation, but most of the time he couldn't really feel his heartbeat even when he put his hand over his own chest. He could easier feel a pulse when he touched his neck in that odd place between a muscle and his chin. So it wasn't that strange to Ashton to feel the lack of a pulse, except that then he remembered that there wasn't a heart underneath. An empty shell..

That was something he tried his best not to think about, mostly because he couldn't understand how important it was, like Xigbar said. Ashton didn't really think about things that could damage or change his view of the world.

"I - .. I am sorry you lost your heart," Ashton said, his voice breaking a little. He remembered what Axel had said what seemed so long ago: "And that you have no emotions of your own. Even now, you're just being influenced by my own heart.."

He looked up sharply at Xigbar, his eyes suddenly determined. "Did it ever work for anyone? The - well, Number I's idea. I know Axel got sort of a heart, but that's different."

"Didn't 'lose' it. Got taken from me," Xigbar lightly corrected, as though the matter amused him more than anything else. He squeezed those hands over his chest, grinning a little as he spoke. "Mind you, I deserved it for bein' a real moron and biting a baited hook an' all, but man! If I could do it all over again, I'd have stopped things then and there. Shame I can't, huh? Used to be a real trend-setter, me, and now I can't even feel for myself. Feel like I'm handicapped."

At that sudden determined look, Xigbar sharply barked out his laughter. "That's a good one! That's a good one. Nope, me and the whole crew get killed before we could figure it out. 'least that's what they tell me; I'm from pretty early on, when it comes to the experiments. There was another way that might've worked, but I never got a chance to try it."

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DAY 26: Men's Showers (Second Shift)

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