Day 63: Morris Park (Noon)

[purgatio]

There were many and myriad places wild for a small child to hide within when given half-free rein. It was more than what was given at their previous home, and so even in a town considered small, it was large enough for Albedo to wander for a quiet spot, secluded and nearly obsolete in its obscurity. The park he found, far from the one they had entered next to, was overgrown, foliage patchy and dead not from the cold. He stared as someone crossed the park, in a heavy parka and ski-cap, a swaying, sauntering walk to their name. Trash littered the dead grass, but water was heard somewhere in the distance, and Albedo found he didn't mind either as there were so many trees close together to forget any chance of wide open spaces.

There was something of remembrance in this, dark alcoves and dirt mounds before a tree, and Albedo was comforted, deeply and fiercely, as he hadn't been for months by that. His fingers clenched unconsciously, and he eyed a gnarled tree nearby, a dead space around its roots. The ground was frozen--he knew that rationally, but he didn't stop himself from dropping in front of it, didn't stop himself and tearing his fingers until they bled by digging at the earth.

It affected, still. Even now. Even here. The thought of death and all its trimmings, another's corpse falling down, and the same adage rolled within his mind. The same line of reasoning, held and kept and not as outgrown as he thought-- I'm digging graves... So when they die, I won't cry.

Had he broken that already? Had he? He couldn't remember. He couldn't--

[ brofriend. ]

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[atrabilis]

There were means to an end, steps to a destination. Against his better nature, Nigredo threw caution to the wind. Against a paradigm, despite the heavy fever and the blemish sticking to his skin, he took what was in front of him and followed a winding path to a desolate grove of trees. A nurse had caught him walking and warned him of delinquents, but nothing in the boy wished to take heed. He brushed her off and wandered in, eyes searching for the one element he sought.

He found him at a distance, crouched down against the earth. His focus was elsewhere, and if not for a disconcerting factor, Nigredo might have called out to him, drawing Albedo's attention to something he should have conveyed the night before. Instead, he froze. He stood stock-still and wondered when this scenery had become familiar.

Weeks had passed, but they had written off Albedo and his habits as sulking. Gaignun's presence distracted them long enough to never realize the extent of the middle brother's 'habits'. Here, without the cat or Rubedo, Nigredo was bearing full witness to what they had carefully overlooked, and he--

He hadn't a clue. He didn't know what reaction was best. The youngest could only stare outright, keeping himself to silence as his brother dug into the ground as if in a trance.

[purgatio]

Nothing. There was nothing to be found, here, under the dirt, under the first layer of dry and dismantling topsoil made infertile from the cold season. It seemed... It seemed apt in that, and a part of him was further away, watching and noting all that he did and that part seemed interested. Curious. He had never done this since things had occurred, never done this since that girl had died, since Sakura--

His motions stopped with a jerk, a high hiss passing through his lips as his head shot up to stare wide-eyed at the tree before him. That girl--

What girl? What name had he thought? Nothing, of course; no name and no one, and that was the way it would stay, because then there was two, two who had died--

(Two who had died for him.)

The boy gave a low whimper and rested his hands onto the earth, blood-stained fingers weakly kneading the dry soil.

[atrabilis]

It was strange to be privy to another's mind--stranger when another was known well. He placed respectable distance between them, and still, the impressions rose before him without effort, an aura of death encompassing all. And for that brief instant, he had thought he heard--

The name was thrown. Nigredo moved swiftly, trudging through the overgrowth to reach his older brother. One arm stretched to touch a shoulder and hesitated, grasping cloth instead. Others would have found it unusual that a brother would falter in his worry, but Nigredo felt as though he had encroached on a time not meant for him.

It was for this reason he kept quiet. For this, he did not question what lay at his feet, the stench of earth heavy in the cold air.

[purgatio]

He had been faltering. In only and nothing more than than his own senses. How many times had he missensed something, having not become aware of another's presence? How many times now, over the past days, had he been surprised?

Surprised, but not startled, at the touch against cloth, for it was Nigredo, for who else would it be, and his senses gave him that within a moment's breath afterword. There was no petty anger at being discovered, no dismay at being found; any higher emotion was beyond him, and the fact of his brother's presence eased all anxieties for the moment.

Albedo leaned back and turned to wrap his arms around Nigredo's legs, paying no mind to the blood and dirt on his fingers. It was another faucet to be overlooked, another flaw to forgive, and Nigredo would love him still, he would, he would still accept him, and Albedo needed that. He needed that very much.

[atrabilis]

There was something to consider in this. When a loved one would reach for him without question, when he would convey a need with intent, Nigredo had to think on the reasoning. He did not here. Here, there existed no need. The child bent down and took Albedo into his arms, wrapping him tightly enough to leave no room for questions.

Nigredo kept to the tune of silence, allowing no meaningless comfort to grace between them. One did not speak for speech alone. One spoke to communicate, to share secrets, and with everything as they were, they needn't say a word.

No, they needn't say anything at all.